Tootsie (1982)

Jessica Lange: Julie Nichols

Photos 

Quotes 

• Julie : I miss Dorothy.

  Michael Dorsey : You don't have to. She's right here. And she misses you. Look, you don't know me from Adam. But I was a better man with you, as a woman... than I ever was with a woman, as a man. You know what I mean? I just gotta learn to do it without the dress. At this point, there might be an advantage to my wearing pants. The hard part's over, you know? We were already... good friends.

• Julie : [answering phone]  Hello?

  Dorothy Michaels : That's a corncob.

• Julie : I know I'm pretty and I use it. I just guess I shouldn't have gone to Dr. Brewster's office so late.

  Dorothy Michaels : Well, no, that's not true. You know, Dr. Brewster has tried to seduce several nurses on this ward, always claiming to be in the throes of an uncontrollable impulse. Do you know what?

  Ron Carlisle : Uh-oh.

  Dorothy Michaels : I think I'm gonna give every nurse on this floor an electric cattle prod, and just instruct them to just *zap* him in his badoobies.

  Julie : [Tries, unsuccessfully, to hold back a giggle] 

  Ron Carlisle : Cattle prod?

  Dorothy Michaels : Ruby? Hi, you wanna open the Yellow Pages under the section, Farm Equipment Retail...

• Mrs. Crawley, Amy's Nanny : Miss Nichols.

  Dorothy Michaels : Oh, my stars!

  Julie : Dorothy, this is Mrs. Crowley. She helps me with Amy.

  Mrs. Crawley, Amy's Nanny : THAT CHILD WILL NEVER LEARN ANYTHING IF...

  Julie : Thank you, Mrs. Crowley.

  [whispering, to Dorothy] 

  Julie : She scares the shit out of me.

• Julie : Hi. We met the other day. Julie Nichols, hospital slut.

• Julie : You mind if I ask you a question? Do you worry about using so much heavy make-up on your skin all the time?

  Dorothy Michaels : No. I don't worry. I have a little - mustache problem I'm real sensitive to. Probably just too many male hormones or something.

  Julie : Well, some men find that attractive.

  Dorothy Michaels : I know, I know. I just don't like the men that find it attractive.

• Julie : Listen, you don't think I do this without a plan, do you?

  Dorothy Michaels : What do you mean?

  Julie : There are a lot of men out there. I'm selective. I look around very carefully. And when I find the one I think can give me the worst possible time, that's when I make my move.

• Julie : All my lines sound like subtitles for a Czech movie.

• Dorothy Michaels : Why do you drink so much?

  Julie : Because it's not fattening, and it's not good for me. How many things can you say that about?

• Dorothy Michaels : Why do you drink so much?

  Julie : When you grow up the way I did, an orphan raised by a sister 16 years older, you got few illusions.

• Julie : Truthfully, don't you find being a woman in the '80s complicated?

  Dorothy Michaels : Extremely.

• Julie : You know what I wish, just once?

  Dorothy Michaels : What?

  Julie : That a guy could be honest enough just to walk right up to me and say, "Hey, listen, you know, I'm confused about this too. I could lay a big line on you, we could do a lot of role-playing. But the simple truth is, I find you very interesting, and I'd really like to make love with you." Simple as that. Wouldn't that be a relief?

  Dorothy Michaels : Heaven. Sheer heaven.

• Julie : I've always hated women who treat other women as stand-ins for men.

• Julie : I remember her helping me pick out this wallpaper. I'd chosen one with great big, purple flowers on it. And she said to me, "Just remember that once you choose it, it's gonna cover the walls of your room for a long, long time." So I tried to imagine what those big, purple flowers were gonna look like on all the walls of my room every night when I was falling asleep and every morning when I was getting dressed. So I said to her, "Which one would you choose, Mom?" And she said, "The one with the daisies and the little rosebuds, because daisies are such homey flowers and rosebuds are so cheerful and always waiting to bloom."

  Dorothy Michaels : That's lovely.

  Julie : I made a million plans looking at this wallpaper. I was always waiting for these rosebuds to open.

• Julie : You wouldn't live this kind of lie, would you?

  Dorothy Michaels : Well, no, I wouldn't.

• Julie : What the hell. I'll live, won't I? Maybe not happily, but honestly. Sounds like something you'd say.

  Dorothy Michaels : Julie, you mustn't idealize me. Honesty, in many ways, is a relative term.

• Julie : Dorothy, it's me.

  Dorothy Michaels : No, it's me.

  Julie : No, it's me.

  Dorothy Michaels : No, it's me.

  Julie : Not, it's me. I'm just not well-adjusted enough.

• Julie : I'm sure I've got the same impulses. I mean, obviously, I did have the same impulses.

  Dorothy Michaels : Don't jump to conclusions about that impulse. That impulse is a good impulse, Julie. If you could just see me out of these clothes...

• Julie : My God! No, please, don't say anything.

  Dorothy Michaels : But there's a reason.

  Julie : I understand the reason.

  Dorothy Michaels : No, no. That reason is not the reason.