John Candy credited as playing...
Desk Sergeant (segment "Harry Canyon") • Dan (segment "Den") • Den (segment "Den") • Robot (segment "So Beautiful and So Dangerous")
- [after sex]
- Robot: Earth women who experience sexual ecstasy with mechanical assistance always tend to feel guilty!
- Den: [as the Queen presents her disrobed body to him] Wow! 18 years of nothing, and now twice in one day! What a place!
- [looking at a beautiful naked woman with huge breasts]
- Den: [voiceover] She had the most beautiful eyes. I wanted to make some conversation. But I found my new self asking the same old stupid questions.
- [to the woman]
- Den: Are you from around here?
- Katherine (segment "Den"): Well, you may not believe this, but I'm from another planet. It's called Earth.
- Den: Earth. I too am from Earth.
- Katherine (segment "Den"): My name is Katherine Wells. I am from the British Colony Gibraltar. You saved my life. I have no reward to give you, but if any part of me pleases your senses, I will give it to you willingly.
- [they lie down on the ground and start to have sex]
- Desk Sergeant: Before you go any further, pal, I gotta tell ya it's cash up front. A thousand bucks a day for a full investigation, another thou' if the assailant is caught. Do you understand?
- Harry Canyon: Yeah. Hey, here's a dollar. Thanks for nothin'.
- Desk Sergeant: Think you can do better?... Punk.