Plot

Facing hanging, a bank robber makes a deal with the corrupt banker to avoid execution in exchange for a dirty assignment.

"Cactus" Jack Slade (Kirk Douglas) is the meanest bad man in the west, or so he thinks. When a bank robbery goes awry, he lands in jail facing a hangman's noose. When the corrupt owner of the bank offers him a job, Jack sees a chance to stay alive and get rich in the process. All he has to do is steal a strongbox full of money the banker lent to Mr. Parody Jones (Strother Martin) who needs it to keep his mining operation going. If he defaults on the loan, our "friendly" banker takes over the mine. Ms. Charming Jones (Ann-Margret) comes to town to collect the money and take it back to her father, Parody. To ensure the money makes it back home, Parody has called in a favor from a man who owes him a life debt. Enter Handsome Stranger (Arnold Schwarzenegger). The toughest and strongest hero in the west. As tough as a steel plate but, unfortunately, just as dense. As Charming and Handsome set off on their journey, Jack sets out after them. Using his trusty "Bad Men Of The West" handbook, Jack sets one trap after another only to have each one go awry in true Wile E. Coyote versus The Roadrunner fashion. With Looney Tunes-style sight gags in almost every scene, this movie will have you and your whole family laughing up a storm.—gorn9146

Charming Jones has to make it from the train station to her ancestral homestead to collect her inheritance. Handsome Stranger acts as her escort and bodyguard. "Cactus" Jack Slade has been hired to stop them both.—Afterburner <aburner@erols.com>

Original synopsis: This movie is basically a live action roadrunner and coyote. Very funny.

Full Synopsis:

The fun begins as outlaw Cactus Jack Slade attempts to rob the bank using a "bank robber's guide". The attempted bank robbery is an hilarious scene in itself, as Cactus Jack encounters the drunken bank teller after hours, and ends up blowing up the bank while trying to open the safe.

When Parody Jones sends his daughter, Charming (who obviously LOVES good-looking men), to bring her inheritance back from the bank, banker Avery Simpson decides that he wants the cash and, despite the fact that Cactus Jack destroyed his bank, hires the bumbling outlaw to bring the money back. Not trusting anyone, Parody Jones recruits Handsome Stranger (who owes him a favor) to escort his daughter back with the money. The naïve Handsome Stranger fulfills his obligation by meeting Charming as she gets off of the train, to remain with her until they return to her homestead.

The always hilarious Mel Tillis provides more fun as the telegraph operator helping Handsome Stranger with the message from Parody Jones.

Once Charming Jones and Handsome Stranger start toward the Jones' homestead with the money, more fun ensues as Cactus Jack (who you would swear was just like the coyote in the Road Runner cartoons) attempts to stop them to get the cash. Along the way, they also encounter Chief Nervous Elk. Cactus Jack's horse, Whiskey, is every bit as much a character as Cactus Jack himself. You'll never see a horse with more personality in any film!

For those who truly enjoy western spoofs with a touch of Looney Tunes, you'll definitely enjoy this delightful film! Be sure to watch for a slight plot twist at the end!!!