Shared with you
- Alan-A-Dale: Man, oh man! That Prince John sure made good his threat! And his helpless subjects paid dearly for his humiliation, believe me. Taxes, taxes, taxes. Why, he taxed the whole heart and soul out of the poor people of Nottingham, and if you couldn't pay your taxes, you went to jail. Yep, I'm in here too. Nottingham was in deep trouble.
- Little John: You know somethin', Robin. I was just wonderin', are we good guys or bad guys? You know, I mean, uh? Our robbin' the rich to feed the poor.
- Robin Hood: Rob? Tsk tsk tsk. That's a naughty word. We never rob. We just sort of borrow a bit from those who can afford it.
- Little John: Borrow? Boy, are we in debt.
- Robin Hood: [after just swinging her to safety, he takes her hand] Marian, my love, will you marry me?
- Marian: Oh, darling, I thought you'd never ask me!
- [moves behind Robin Hood so he can continue to fight the Sheriff's men]
- Marian: [giggles] But you could have chosen a more romantic setting!
- Robin Hood: For our honeymoon: London! Normandy!
- Marian: Yes!
- Robin Hood: Sunny Spain?
- Marian: [laughs] Why not?
- Friar Tuck: [the sheriff has just taken the last farthing out of the church's poor box] Now, just a minute, Sheriff! That's the poor box!
- Sheriff of Nottingham: It sure is, and I think I'll take it to poor Prince John. Every little bit helps.
- Mother Church Mouse: Ooh! You put that back!
- Sheriff of Nottingham: And the good Lord blesses you, little sister.
- Friar Tuck: [shouts furiously] You thieving scoundrel!
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Now, take it easy, Friar, I'm just doing my duty.
- Friar Tuck: Collecting taxes for that arrogant, greedy, ruthless, no-good Prince John?
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Listen, Friar, you're mighty preachy and you're gonna preach your neck right into a hangman's noose!
- Friar Tuck: [screams] Get out of my church! Out! Out! Out! Out!
- [pushes the Sheriff out into the rain]
- Friar Tuck: You want taxes? I'll give you taxes!
- [begins assaulting the Sheriff]
- Father Saxton: Give it to him! Give it to him! Give it to him, Friar!
- Little John: [as Robin hums dreamily] Hey, lover boy. How's that grub comin'? Man, I'm starved.
- [Robin continues humming]
- Little John: Rob? Robin? Ro-BEAR? Hey!
- Robin Hood: Hmm? What? What do you say?
- Little John: Aw, forget it. Your mind's not on food. You're thinkin' about somebody with long eyelashes, and you're smellin' that sweet perfume.
- [sniffs smoke and starts coughing]
- Robin Hood: Hey, whoa, it's boiling over!
- Little John: You're burning the chow!
- [takes the pot off the fire and fans it]
- Robin Hood: Sorry, Johnny. Guess I was thinking about Maid Marian again. I can't help it. I love her, Johnny.
- Little John: Look, why don't you stop moonin' and mopin' around? - Just - Just marry the girl.
- Robin Hood: Marry her? You don't just walk up to a girl, hand her a bouquet and say, "Hey, remember me? We were kids together. Will you marry me?" No. It just isn't done that way.
- Little John: Aw, come on, Robbie. Climb the castle walls. Sweep her off her feet. Carry her off in style.
- Robin Hood: It's no use, Johnny. I've thought it all out, and... it just wouldn't work. Besides, what have I got to offer her?
- Little John: Well, for one thing, you can't cook.
- Robin Hood: I'm serious, Johnny. She's a highborn lady of quality.
- Little John: So she's got class? So what?
- Robin Hood: I'm an outlaw, that's what. That's no life for a lovely lady. Always on the run. What kind of a future is that?
- Friar Tuck: Oh, for heaven's sake, son. You're no outlaw. Why, someday you'll be called a great hero.
- Robin Hood: A hero? Do you hear that, Johnny? We've just been pardoned.
- Little John: That's a gas. We ain't even been arrested yet.
- Alan-A-Dale: Oh, incidentally, I'm Alan-A-Dale, a minstrel. That's an early-day folk singer. My job is to tell it like it is, or was, or whatever.
- Robin Hood: [He and Little John are dressed as Gypsy women] Ooh-de-la-lay! Ooh-de-la-lay! Fortune tellers!
- Little John: Fortunes forecast! Lucky charms!
- Robin Hood: Catch the dope with your horoscope!
- Little John: The prince? Wait a minute. There's a law against robbing royalty. I'll catch you later.
- Robin Hood: [in disguise] I'm gonna win that Golden Arrow, and then I'm goin' to present meself to Maid Marian.
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Listen, Scissorbill. If you shoot half as well as you blabbermouth, you're better than Robin Hood.
- Robin Hood: Robin Hood, he says? Wowee! I'm tip-top, alright, but I'm not as good as he is.
- [Shoots a perfect bullseye]
- Prince John: I sentence you to sudden, instant, and even immediate death!
- Marian: Oh, no. Please. Please, sire. I beg of you to spare his life. Please have mercy.
- Prince John: My dear, emotional lady, why should I?
- Marian: Because I love him, Your Highness.
- Prince John: Love him? And does this prisoner return your love?
- Robin Hood: Marian, my darling, I love you more than life itself.
- Prince John: [Sincerely] Young love, your pleads have not fallen upon a heart of stone.
- [Tone changes to fierce and determined]
- Prince John: But traitors to the crown must die!
- Robin Hood: [cutting him off] Traitor to the crown? That crown belongs to King Richard. Long live King Richard!
- Crowd: Long live King Richard!
- Prince John: [gives the crowd a dirty look]
- [Throwing a childish tantrum]
- Prince John: Enough! I am King! King! King! Off with his head!
- Nutsy: [shouting] One o'clock and all's well!
- Sheriff of Nottingham: [clock chimes three times] Nutsy, you better set your brain ahead two hours.
- Nutsy: Right. Hey, Sheriff, does that there mean adding or subtracting?
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Oh, just forget everything.
- Nutsy: Yes sir, yes sir.
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Nutsy, how am I supposed to sleep with you yelling "all's well" all the time?
- [the Sheriff of Nottingham enters the castle singing]
- Sheriff of Nottingham: He throws an angry tantrum if he cannot have his way / He calls for Mom and sucks his thumb and doesn't want to play / Too late to be known as John the First, he's sure to be known as John the Worst!
- [to Sir Hiss]
- Sheriff of Nottingham: [speaking] Am I right?
- Hiss: [chuckles] That's P.J. to a "T". Let me try, let me try.
- [lowers his voice]
- Hiss: [singing] Too late to be known as John the First, he's sure to be known as John the Worst!
- [sees an angry Prince John peeking behind a door, with a glass jug of wine in his hand, shrivels]
- Hiss: The Fabulous, Marvelous, Merciful, Chivalrous.
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Oh, you've got it all wrong, Hiss. The Sniveling, Groveling, Measly, Weaseling.
- Prince John: [shouts] Enough!
- [throws the glass jug at the sheriff, but it hits the wall and the wine rains down on him]
- Sheriff of Nottingham: But, but Sire, it's a big hit. The whole village is singing it.
- Prince John: Oh, they are, are they? Well, they'll be singing a different tune. Double the taxes! Triple the taxes!
- [grabs Sir Hiss by the neck]
- Prince John: Squeeze every last drop out of those insolent musical peasants.
- [Prince John and Hiss have just been robbed by Robin Hood and Little John]
- Hiss: I knew it! I knew this would happen! I tried to warn you, but no, no, no, you wouldn't listen. You just had to.
- [Prince John is about to hit Hiss with his mirror]
- Hiss: Ah! Ah! Ah! Seven years bad...
- [Hiss yelps as the mirror crashes right down on him]
- Hiss: Luck. That's what it is. Besides, you broke your mother's mirror.
- Prince John: Ahh! Mommy!
- [sucks his thumb and gets mud all over it]
- Prince John: I've got a dirty thumb.
- Little John: [as Sir Reginald] Ah, milord, the esteemed royal sovereign of the realm. The head man himself. You're beautiful.
- Prince John: [chuckles] He has style, eh, Hiss? Du savoir-faire il y a, n'est-ce pas, Hiss.
- Little John: You took the words right out of my mouth, P.J.
- Prince John: [Absolutely delighted] P.J.! I like that, do you know I do! Hiss, put it on my luggage.
- Friar Tuck: All right, laugh, you two rogues, but there's gonna be a big to-do in Nottingham.
- [tastes the stew and coughs]
- Friar Tuck: Well done, ain't it? Old Prince John's having a championship archery tournament tomorrow.
- Little John: Archery tournament? Huh! Old Rob could win that standing on his head. Huh, Rob?
- Robin Hood: Thank you, Little John, but I'm sure we're not invited.
- Friar Tuck: No, but there's somebody who will be very disappointed if you don't come.
- Little John: Yeah, ol' Bushel Britches, the Honorable Sheriff of Nottingham.
- Friar Tuck: No, Maid Marian.
- Robin Hood: Maid Marian?
- Friar Tuck: Yeah. She's gonna give a kiss to the winner.
- [laughs]
- Robin Hood: A kiss to the winner? Oodelaly! Come on, Johnny! What are we waiting for?
- Friar Tuck: Wait a minute, Rob. Hold it. That place will be crawling with soldiers.
- Robin Hood: Ah, but remember, faint hearts never won fair lady. Fear not, my friends.
- [he shoots an arrow, it ricochets off a washing tub; Robin then throws his hat in the air, where it is run through by the arrow and lands back on his head]
- Robin Hood: This will be my greatest performance.
- [first lines]
- Alan-A-Dale: You know, there's been a heap of legends and tall tales about Robin Hood. All different too. Well, we folks of the animal kingdom have our own version. It's the story of what really happened in Sherwood Forest.
- Hiss: A perfect fit, Sire! Looks most becoming! You look regal, dignified, sincere, masterful, noble...
- Prince John: Don't overdo it, Hiss!
- Alan-A-Dale: [singing] Every town / Has its ups and downs / Sometimes ups / Outnumber the downs / But not in Nottingham.
- Prince John: Taxes! Taxes! Beautiful, lovely taxes! Ah-hah! Ah-hah!
- Hiss: Sire, you have an absolute skill for encouraging contributions from the poor.
- [chuckles]
- Prince John: To coin a phrase, my dear counselor, rob the poor to give the rich.
- Mother Rabbit: [after Robin cheers Skippy up after his birthday is ruined by the sheriff] Oh, you have made his birthday a wonderful one. How can I ever thank you?
- Robin Hood: I only wish I could do more.
- [hands her a small bag of gold]
- Robin Hood: Here. And keep your chin up. Someday, there'll be happiness again in Nottingham. You'll see.
- [leaves]
- Mother Rabbit: Oh, Robin Hood. You've risked so much to keep our hopes alive. Bless you. Bless you.
- Little John: [singing] All the world will sing of an English king a thousand years from now / And not because he's passed some law or had that lofty brow / While bonnie good King Richard leads the Great Crusade he's on / We'll all have to slave away for good for nothing, John / Incredible as he is inept / Whenever the history books are kept, they'll call him the Phony King of England.
- Friar Tuck: [singing] A pox on the Phony King of England.
- Skippy - a Rabbit: You gotta take the oath.
- Toby - A Turtle: The oath?
- Tagalong: Put your hand on your heart and cross your eyes.
- Skippy - a Rabbit: Spider, snakes and a lizard head.
- Toby - A Turtle: [repeats] Spider, snakes and a lizard's head.
- Skippy - a Rabbit: If I tattletale, I'll die till I'm dead.
- Toby - A Turtle: [repeats] If I tattletale, I'll die till I'm dead.
- Little John: [after sitting on Hiss] Oh, excuse me, Buster.
- Hiss: Buster? You, sir, have taken my seat!
- Prince John: [laughs] Hiss, with you around, who needs a court jester?
- Prince John: [Robin Hood and Skippy mocked Prince John after another trap failed] Oh, no! It's so miserably unfair!
- Hiss: Well, I tried to tell you, but no, no, no. You wouldn't listen. Your traps just never work. And NOW look what you've done to your mother's castle.
- Prince John: [screams at the sight of his burning castle, with a stick in hand] Mommy!
- [sucks his thumb and chases Sir Hiss]
- Prince John: Hold still!
- Hiss: Sire, no!
- Prince John: You cowardly cobra! Procrastinating python! Aggravating asp!
- Hiss: Save me!
- Prince John: Ooh, you eel in snake's clothing!
- Hiss: Help! He's gone stark raving MAD!
- Prince John: One more hiss out of you uhm Hiss. And you are walking to Nottingham.
- Hiss: [to himself] Snakes don't walk, they slither. Hmph. So there.
- Tagalong: Gee, you're beautiful.
- Sis: Are you going to marry Robin Hood?
- Tagalong: Mama says that you and Robin Hood are sweethearts.
- Marian: Well, you see, that was several years ago, before I left for London.
- Toby - A Turtle: Did he ever kiss you?
- Marian: Well, no, but he carved our initials on this tree. I remember it so well.
- Skippy: Are you gonna have any kids? My mom's got a lot of kids.
- Marian: Oh, he's probably forgotten all about me.
- Skippy: Oh, not Robin Hood! I bet he'll storm the castle one day, fight the guards, rescue ya, and drag you off to Sherwood Forest!
- Clucky: Now, just a minute there, young man! You forgot all about Prince John!
- Skippy: That old Prince John don't scare me none!
- Toby - A Turtle: I'm scared of Prince John. He's cranky.
- [the Sheriff and the vultures are building a scaffold to hang Friar Tuck]
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Well, Trigger. Everything's rigged up and all set.
- Trigger: Yep, it's one of the prettiest scaffolds you ever built, Sheriff.
- Nutsy: Sheriff, don't you reckon you should give that trap door a test?
- [pulls a lever and opens the trap door, allowing the Sheriff to fall in]
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Criminently, now I know why your mama called you "Nutsy".
- Prince John: Hiss! You're never around when I need you!
- Hiss: Coming, coming.
- [begins singing 'For I'm a Jolly Good Fellow' until Prince John uncorks the barrel he's in]
- Hiss: Oh! there you are, old boy! P.J., you're not going to believe this, but the stork is really Robin Hood.
- Prince John: Robin Hood?
- [screams angrily]
- Prince John: [ties Hiss around a pole]
- Prince John: Get out of that, if you can.
- Prince John: Stop! Executioner, stop! Hold your axe!
- Little John: [threatening him with a dagger] Okay, big shot, now tell him to untie my buddy, or I'll.
- Prince John: Sheriff, release my buddy! I mean, release the prisoner!
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Untie the prisoner?
- Clucky: You heard what he said, bushel britches!
- Prince John: Sheriff, I make the rules! And since I'm head man.
- [to Little John]
- Prince John: Not so hard, you mean thing.
- [back to the Sheriff]
- Prince John: Let him go, for heaven sakes! Let him go!
- Robin Hood: [sees Maid Marian] There she is, Little John. Isn't she beautiful?
- Little John: Cool it, loverboy! You're heart's running away with your head!
- Robin Hood: Ah, stop worrying. This disguise will fool my own mother.
- Little John: Yeah, but your mom ain't here. You gotta fool ol' Bushel Britches.
- Little John: And now, your mightiness, allow me to lay some protocol on you.
- Prince John: Oh, no, forgive me, but I lose more jewels that way.
- Little John: You know something, Robin? You're taking too many chances.
- Robin Hood: Chances? You must be joking! That was just a bit of a lark, Little John.
- Little John: Oh, yeah? Take a look at your hat. That's not a candle on a cake.
- Robin Hood: [regarding the arrow in his hat] Hello! This one almost had my name on it, didn't it? They're getting better, you know. You've got to admit it! They are getting better.
- Little John: Yeah, the next thing you know, that sheriff will probably have a rope around our necks!
- [gags as he chokes himself]
- Little John: Pretty hard to laugh hanging there, Rob!
- Robin Hood: The sheriff and his whole posse couldn't lift you off the ground.
- Clucky: [smacking Prince John on the head with the golden arrow] Take that, you scurvy knave!
- Prince John: Seize the fat one!
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Wait a minute. Is the safety on Old Betsy?
- Trigger: [tapping the side of the crossbow] You bet it is, Sheriff.
- Sheriff of Nottingham: That's what I'm afraid of. You go first.
- Hiss: Sire, taxes are pouring in, the jail is full. Oh, and good news, Sire. Friar Tuck is in jail.
- Prince John: [Angry] Friar Tuck? It's Robin Hood I want, you idiot! Oh, I'd give all my gold if I could get my hands on... Did you say Friar Tuck?
- Hiss: Did I? Y-yes, I did.
- Prince John: Yes, yes! I have it, Hiss! I'll use that fat friar as bait to trap Robin Hood.
- Hiss: Another trap?
- Prince John: Yes, you stupid serpent. Friar Tuck will be led to the gallows at the village square, don't you see.
- Hiss: B-But Sire! Hang Friar Tuck? A man of the Church?
- Prince John: Yes, my reluctant reptile, and when our elusive hero tries to rescue the corpulent cleric
- [laughs evilly]
- Prince John: my men will be ready.
- [laughs evilly]
- Prince John: Robbed! I've been robbed! Hiss! You're never around when I need you!
- [clears his throat]
- Prince John: I've been robbed.
- Hiss: Of course you've been robbed!
Contribute to this page
Suggest an edit or add missing content
