Myra Breckinridge (1970)

Rex Reed: Young Man

Photos 

Quotes 

• Myron : It's a dangerous thing, ambition. Ruined Mickey Mouse's whole career.

• Myron : Where are my tits? Where are my tits?

• [first lines] 

  Myron : [sings to himself]  A secret place known to none but me. And in my secret place, you can beg and torture me. I wouldn't tell you where to go. 'Cause in my secret place, secret place, a secret you know. Secret place, a secret you know.

  [Surgeon enters to applause] 

  Surgeon : You realize, once we cut it off, it won't grow back. I mean, it isn't like hair, or fingernails, or toenails, you know.

  Myron : What do you think I am, some kind of idiot? I know that!

  Surgeon : [shrugs]  Eh - how about circumcision? It'd be cheaper.

  Myron : Come on, come on, come on, let's get it over with, Myra's waiting!

  Surgeon : [shrugs]  We'll have to blow up your tits with silicone.

  Myron : I thought they used paraffin.

  Surgeon : No, that would make them inflammable. You wouldn't want inflammable tits, now, do you?

  Myron : [sighs, then sings]  I got a secret place known to none but me. And in my secret...

  Surgeon : [Indistinct]  Cleaver.

  [Clear] 

  Surgeon : I mean scalpel.

  Myron : Well, I should think so.

  Surgeon : Well, wish me luck. I've never done one of these before.

  Myron : [sings]  You can beg and torture me. I wouldn't care.

  [applause] 

• [first title card] 

  [script, crawl, before first lines] 

  Myron : I must write it all down. Exactly as it happened. While it is fresh in my memory. But my hand trembles. Why? Twice I've dropped the yellow ball point pen. Now I sit at the surgical table making the greatest effort to calm myself, to put it all down not only for its own sake but also for you, Randolph, who never dreamed that anyone could ever act out

  [triple underline] 

  Myron : totally

  [end underline] 

  Myron : his fantasies and survive... / Myron Breckinridge

• Myra Breckinridge : Half the world is starving now, and if population continues at the present rate...

  Myron : I know, I know. Famine by 1974. And you can forget about plankton and seaweed, because there's not gonna be enough of that to go around.

• Myron : It's a dangerous thing ambition, ruined Mickey Mouse's whole career. Well now it's no more than eight bars and out Myra honey. You were no more than a Linda Darnell paper doll, a Disney cow that got over the fence and got ambitious. You were great in cinemascope and technicolor, but you can't cut it in black and white.

• Myron : Your goal is...

  Myra Breckinridge : My goal is the destruction of the last vestigial traces of traditional manhood...

  Myron : In order to...

  Myra Breckinridge : Realign the sexes...

  Myron : While...

  Myra Breckinridge : Decreasing the population...

  Myron : Thus...

  Myra Breckinridge : Increasing human happiness...

  Myron : And...

  Myra Breckinridge : Preparing humanity for its next stage.

  Myron : Bravo. Also... bullshit.

• Myron : Why are you so fascinated by the girl?

  Myra Breckinridge : But having raped Rusty's manhood, I must now complete the cycle and seduce his girl. Only then will my victory be complete. Thus exerting power over both sexes and, indeed, over life itself.

• [last lines] 

  Myron : [voiceover]  I'll turn around and I'll come back. You wouldn't understand the way I feel about Mary Ann. That she's Donald Duck straws and Pepsodent toothpaste.

• Myron : You're a fag, aren't you?

  Irving Amadeus : Well, uh, what do you - ? I don't know. I mean, in the Baha'i faith...