The Alphabet Murders (1965)

Robert Morley: Hastings

Photos 

Quotes 

• Hastings : Where have you been? What have you been doing?

  Hercule Poirot : Arranging a little extra insurance my friend.

  Hastings : Oh really? Personally I always feel perfectly safe with British railways. Mind you its very different in France, isn't it?

  Hercule Poirot : I wouldn't know. I am not French, I am Belgian.

  Hastings : Well it's the same thing, you both eat horsemeat.

• Hastings : I thought you'd given up smoking?

  Hercule Poirot : This is a celebration.

  [lights his cigarette] 

  Hastings : Oh, really? What are you celebrating?

  Hercule Poirot : I'm celebrating my first cigarette in 51 days.

• Hercule Poirot : You have disgraced yourself!

  Hastings : How so, pray?

  Hercule Poirot : One does not expect an Englishmen to be an assassin.

• Hastings : Her Majesty's government seems to think that you're a very important person and, as such, are entitled to protection. I understand you're not very popular with the criminal classes.

  Hercule Poirot : No.

  Hastings : It would be the most almighty top-level fuss, you know, if you were stabbed, shot or blown up, or did suffer any inconvenience while on British soil.

  Hercule Poirot : Yes. Yes, I suppose it would, actually. Well, in that case, I suppose you must join me in a massage, my faithful bulldog.

• Hastings : My goodness, these young people certainly take their bowling seriously.

• Japp : He's been at it again, sir.

  Hastings : Has he? Where?

  Japp : [to the phone]  Where?

  [to Hastings] 

  Japp : Hyde Park. Molesting a young woman, sir.