Del Moore crédité pour le rôle de...
Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Kelp, it's human nature. Kelp, people just don't like teachers blowing up their kids!
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Now try to understand that I understand, that scientists and creators have their little eccentricities. Einstein hated hair cuts, Da Vinci loved to paint, and Newton...
- Professor Julius Kelp: He had something to do with figs, didn't he?
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: So therefore I, too, realize that you have many of these - eccentricities. Try leaving them in the locker when you come in in the morning, Professor. And, by all means, feel free to take them home with you at night!
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: [Warfield finishes with papers handed to him by secretary Lemmon] Where's your pad?
- Millie Lemmon: Oh it's only about a mile from the campus. And I have bought the craziest new drapes - you mean my dictation pad, which is in my office. I'm terribly sorry. I'll get it immediately, sir.
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Never mind. What did you want?
- Millie Lemmon: Mr. Love is waiting outside to see you and he's a *gasser*. I mean, shall I ask him to come in, sir?
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: If you can do so without fainting, Miss Lemmon.
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: All right, Kelp. Simmer down and relax. I'm sure that we won't have to have another little talk like this again. Am I correct in assuming this?
- Professor Julius Kelp: Oh, without question, you're absolutely - yes, we'll never have to correct our talk. We won't ever speak. That is, we'll never have to talk again. We just never will discuss talking. Er, we shouldn't really - converse about speaking.
- Stella Purdy: Dr Warfield, well, we don't exactly know how to get in touch with Mr Love, on such short notice, that is.
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: What do you mean you don't know how to get in touch with him? Is he some kind of roving bum or something?
- Buddy Love: Did you really, really do a job in show business? Anyone ever tell you you got a Cary Grant-ish kind of look?
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Oh, really?
- Buddy Love: Did you ever seem him walk towards a gal in a picture like that? Try that walk. Let me see, Doc. I'm just curious. Just walk to me like Cary Grant. Beautiful. Just beautiful. You sure you're doing the right thing working here?
- Buddy Love: You've got the perfect physique and anything you put on swings, right? You look great in? Did you ever think about going into show business?
- Dr. Hamius R. Warfield: Well, I did do a few plays in school.
- Buddy Love: Nutty. Nutty. The girls backstage mob you, swamp you? Is that the picture?
- Buddy Love: Would you think I was terribly rude if I were to ask you the name of your tailor? That's wild. Absolutely gorgeous.
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Oh, you mean this?
- Buddy Love: Just beautiful.
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Oh, well, its actually, it's just a ready-made suit.
- Buddy Love: Oh, you're kidding? Not that.
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Well, it's sort of a handmade-to-order ready-made suit off the rack.
- Buddy Love: Show business - what did you do? Shakespeare?
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Well, I did Hamlet one time.
- Buddy Love: I knew it. Hamlet. Would you do it? Would you stand right there.
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Mr. Love, it's been so long!
- Buddy Love: Would you do it for me, Doctor? Come on, baby. It's gotta be wild. Go ahead. Go ahead.
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Let's see. "To be...
- Buddy Love: Hold it! Do it right. Do it right. Get up on the stage. Let me see. Let me be your audience.
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Oh, oh, really, the faculty...
- Buddy Love: Come on, come on. You know it's the best thing in the world for you. Get up there and perform.
- Dr. Mortimer S. Warfield: Well, if you insist...