The Bullwinkle Show (1959–1963)

Bill Scott: Bullwinkle J. Moose, Additional Voices, Mr. Peabody, Dudley Do-Right, Fearless Leader, King, Gidney, Homer, Mr. Big, Magic Mirror, Spike, Chauncey, Edgar, Lion, Captain Peachfuzz, Igo Bumbling, Sheriff, Witch, Belcher, Calvin, Fairy Godmother, Oogle Bird, Rabbit, Scientist, Announcer, Bear, Charlie, Doctor, Father, Fox, Hare, Janitor, Major, Man, Mr. Lamb, Norbert, Pasha, Preacher, Psychiatrist, Wise Man, APB Man, Alley Cat, Attorney, Bangle, Barber, Bauble, Bead, Benson, Big Dwarf, Bruno, Bully, Butcher, Caleb, Captain, Castle Cook, Cat, Charlie Bear, Citizen, Clyde Clod, Cobbler, Colonel Ogden Krimcrammer, Country Frog, Director, Duel Man, Duke Porkington of Hogg, Dwarf, Elf #1, English Board Member, Featherby, Fish, Governor Gessler, Grampa Moose, Hatchet's Friend, Hatful, Ice Cream Vendor, J.B. Hogfat, Jack, Judge, King Ferdinand, King's Aide, Knight, Luigi, M.C.A., Mailman, Man #2, Manny, Master, Mayor, Medical Officer, Merle, Mink #2, Mr. Frapp, Mule, Nervous Mouse, Ogre, Old Mouse, One Ton Lee, Orville Wright, Pelican, Philippe Mignon...

Quotes 

• Rocket J. Squirrel : Bullwinkle, those are girls!...

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Bullwinkle, this is terrible!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : It is?

  Rocket J. Squirrel : What kind of game can you play with girls?

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Boy, this really is a children's show, isn't it?

  [Bullwinkle looks into the camera] 

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Parcheesi, of course.

• Narrator : Well, today we find our heroes flying along smoothly...

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Flying along smoothly?

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : You're just looking at the picture sideways!

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Actually it's like this!

  Narrator : Oh... OH GOOD HEAVENS! Today we find our heroes plunging straight down toward disaster at supersonic speed!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : That's better.

• Bullwinkle J. Moose : Hey, Rocky; watch me pull a rabbit outta my hat!

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Again?

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Nothin' up my sleeve - Presto!

  [pulls Rocky out of the hat] 

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Well, I'm gettin' close.

• Rocky : Bullwinkle, it says here that for you to inherit the fortune, you have to spend the weekend in the ancestral home, Abominable Manor.

  Bullwinkle : That's no problem. I've been living in an abominable manner all my life.

• Rocky : Bullwinkle, do you know what an A-Bomb is?

  Bullwinkle : Sure, a bomb is what some people call our show.

  Rocky : I don't think that's very funny.

  Bullwinkle : Neither do they, apparently.

• Rocky : Bullwinkle, I'm worried.

  Bullwinkle : Ratings down in the show again?

  Rocky : No.

  Bullwinkle : That's odd.

  Rocky : I'm worried because there have already been two attempts on your life.

  Bullwinkle : Oh, don't worry. We will be renewed.

  Rocky : I'm not talking about the Bullwinkle Show.

  Bullwinkle : You had better; we could use the publicity.

• Rocky : [recognizing Boris's voice]  That voice. Where have I heard that voice before?

  Bullwinkle : In about 365 other episodes. But I don't know who it is, either.

• Bullwinkle J. Moose : [a Bullwinkle Puppet Intro for Fractured Fairy Tales]  "And now it's time for another fairy tale. A piece of transparent nonsense which really doesn't fool anybody but, which makes people feel better. You know... ; like the TV Code of Ethics?"

• [lead-in to many commercials] 

  Rocky : Look, Bulliwinkle, a message in a bottle.

  Bullwinkle : Fan mail from some flounder?

  Rocky : This is what I really call a message.

• [Rocky and Bullwinkle have brought an old model ship to an antique dealer] 

  Rocky : Bullwinkle, this ship is covered in rubies and look what's written on the side! O-Mar Khay-yam. Bullwinkle, do you know what this is?

  Bullwinkle : Well, if you're waiting on me to say it, I won't.

  Antique Dealer : Me neither.

  Rocky : OK, then this must be

  [pause] 

  Rocky : "The Ruby Yacht of Omar Khayyam".

  Bullwinkle , Antique Dealer : OOOOH!

• Bullwinkle : You just leave it to my pal Rock. He's the brains of the outfit.

  General : And what does that make you?

  Bullwinkle : What else? The executive.

• ["Bullwinkle's Corner" does "Tom, Tom the Piper's Son" as a "Dragnet" spoof. Bullwinkle, as Tom, is arrested for stealing a pig. At the police station, he is grilled under a hot light by two police detectives who speak in quick "Dragnet"-style dialogue] 

  Police Officer #1 : D'you know it's a felony to pack a pig over a state line?

  Police Officer #2 : Pig-napping!

  Bullwinkle : But, it's a pig in a poem!

  Police Officer #1 : Oh, a pig in a poke, huh?

  Bullwinkle : Not "poke." "Poem." Pig in a poem!

  Police Officer #2 : Pig poem?

  Bullwinkle : [Measuring with his hands]  Not so pig, just about...

  Police Officer #1 : You makin' fun of the way we talk?

  Bullwinkle : [Frustrated]  No, but it's *catchin'!*

  Police Officer #2 : [Writing on a notepad]  Name?

  Bullwinkle : I'm Tom, Tom the Piper's Son!

  Police Officer #1 : [Holds up the pig]  All right, Piper's Son. What were you gonna do with the pig?

  Bullwinkle : Well, the poem says, "The pig was eat." But...

  Police Officer #2 : Gonna eat it, huh?

  Police Officer #1 : On a platter?

  Police Officer #2 : Apple in it's mouth, like that?

  Bullwinkle : [angry]  Certainly not!

  Police Officer #1 : All right, Piper's Son, you can go. But don't leave town.

  Bullwinkle : Thanks! Can I have my pig back?

  Police Officer #2 : No. Evidence.

  Bullwinkle : [Moves toward the door]  Darn!

  Police Officer #1 : One more thing, Piper's Son.

  Bullwinkle : What's that?

  Police Officer #1 : [Holds up the pig, smiling]  You got an apple on you?

  [Bullwinkle looks dizzy. The "Dragnet" theme plays: 'Dum de dum dum!'] 

• Boris : [trying to trick Rocky and Bullwinkle]  I am part of one of the biggest advertising company's in the country. Dancer, Prancer, Blitzen, and Fink.

  Bullwinkle : Yeah, I have heard of those first three fellows, but who is Fink?

  Boris : I am Fink.

  Natasha : You can say that again, dahling.

• Bullwinkle : But here, cleverly disguised as a bomb, is a bomb.

• Bullwinkle : Eenie meenie chili beanie, the spirits are about to speak.

• Rocket J. Squirrel : And now...

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Hey Rocky! Watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat!

  Rocket J. Squirrel : But that trick never works!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : This time for sure! Presto! Well i'm getting close.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : And now it's time for another special feature!

• Narrator : And so we come to the end of another fun filled episode of Rocky and Bullwinkle!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : You know Rock He sure got some funny ideas about fun.

• Cloyd : On the moon we always carry a spare heart.

  Bullwinkle : Must be nice come Valentine's Day.

• [repeated lines] 

  Rocky : And now...

  Bullwinkle : Hey, Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit outta my hat.

• [repeated line] 

  Dudley Do-Right : Stop, Snidely Whiplash, in the name of the law.

• Bullwinkle : [explaining the components of a stereo system]  This is the amplifier, which amplifies the sound. And this is the preamplifier, which, of course, amplifies the pree.

• Rocky : For all of you who want to be tigers in the field of journalism, here's Mr. Know-It-All.

  Bullwinkle : Hello, copycats.

• Bullwinkle : Today's lesson is how to be a lion tamer and pick up a little scratch... on the side... of your head.

• Mr. Hector Peabody : Sherman, that is your 1,000th fortune cookie. Do you want to spoil your dinner?

• Rocky : It's Bullwinkle!

  Captain Peter "Wrongway" Peachfuzz : Or a figment of somebody's imagination.

  Rocky : Figure of who's imagination?

  Bullwinkle : Who you calling a Fig Newton?

• Bullwinkle : Got the wrong script from the teleprompter. As you know this is really the Humphley/Brinley report. No no. The Bullwinkle Show. And I am your moose-ster of ceremonies for the next half-hour: Bullwinkle his-self. As if you couldn't tell. I mean what other show has a host who sings, dances, recites poetry and has antlers? Well, on this network anyway...

• Bullwinkle : I'd like to apply for a job as an usher?

  Boris : What experience have you had?

  Bullwinkle : I've been in the dark for most of my life.

• Dudley Do-Right : Curses! Foiled again!

  Snidely Whiplash : Hey! That's *my* line!

• Rocky : A thousand dollars to get to Frostbite Falls?

  Bullwinkle : You can buy the place for eight dollars cash.

• Bullwinkle : [Last lines in last episode of series]  Well, the old place is back to sub-normal, Rock?

  [while fishing from a boat with Rocky near Moosylvania] 

  Rocky : Yeah and we-

  [interrupted by sound of gunshot] 

  Rocky : Hey, was that a shot?

  Bullwinkle : Heck, no, Rock.

  Rocky : Well, it sounded like a shot.

  Bullwinkle : Nope.

  Rocky : Then, what was it?

  Bullwinkle : That was, "The End."

  ["The End" appears in the sky above their boat] 

  The Announcer : By George, he's got it! It is "The End." But watch for another episode soon of "Rocky and Bullwinkle."

  Bullwinkle : It may be a little hard to find, but don't give up.

  Rocky : We're not!

• Rocket J. Squirrel : And now it's time for...

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Time for that jolly juggler Bullwinkle!

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Oh dear.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Three at once. One. Two...

  Rocket J. Squirrel : And now here's a feature you're sure to like.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Three.

• Bullwinkle : [pointing to Florida on a map]  Here it is: Frostbite Falls, Minnesota.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Bullwinkle, that's Florida!

  Bullwinkle : Well, if they keep adding new states all the time how can you expect me to keep up?

• Rocky : Bullwinkle, did you forget the plot again?

  Bullwinkle : In a word, you said it.

  Rocky : That's three words.

  Bullwinkle : I'm a heavy tipper.

• [repeated line] 

  Bullwinkle : Jumping G. Horsefat!

• Rocky : Are you getting sea sick, Bullwinkle?

  Bullwinkle : No, I always turn green this time of year.

  Rocky : Well if you think this is bad?

  Bullwinkle : Yeah.

  Rocky : Just wait till we cast off.

• Bullwinkle : [Puppet Intro]  And now it's time for another fairy tale. A piece of transparent nonsense which really doesn't fool anybody but, which makes people feel better. You know... ; like the TV Code of Ethics?"

• Rocky : Rocky:

  [recognizing Boris's voice] 

  Rocky : That voice. Where have I heard that voice before?

  Bullwinkle : Bullwinkle: Rocky, you hear more voices than Joan of Arc.