Don't Throw That Knife (1951)

Larry Fine: Larry

Quotes 

• Moe : Larry you play part of the husband of the house, you play his wife.

  Shemp : Oh, no I wouldn't be his wife.

  Larry : Why not?

  Shemp : You're not my type.

• Moe : [Shemp and Larry are pretending to be a couple]  Good morning what is your name please?

  Shemp : Shempena Howard.

  Moe : Well married or single?

  Shemp : Married and this is my husband, the rat.

  Larry : Cut it out.

  Moe : Tell me Sir, have you any children?

  Larry : [Larry counts his fingers]  No children.

  Moe : Where were you born, madam?

  Shemp : In the hospital.

  Moe : Hospital?

  Shemp : Yes, I want to be near my mother.

• Larry : What does your husband do?

  Lucy Wyckoff : He's an expert in legerdemain.

  Larry : Legerdemain. Oh, a bookkeeper.

  Lucy Wyckoff : No, he's a prestidigitator.

  Shemp : Oh, a pants presser?

  Moe : Are you guys ignorant? Didn't you hear the lady say? He presses refrigerators.

  Shemp , Larry : Oh!

  Lucy Wyckoff : No, no, no. We do an illusion act in vaudeville. He's a magician. He makes things disappear.

  Shemp : I got an uncle who can make things disappear.

  Moe : Is he a magician?

  Shemp : No, he's a kleptomaniac.

• Larry : [through an empty TV screen to Mr. Wycoff, who's about to throw knives at Moe and Shemp]  Ah, ah, ah! Don't you dare! Don't you dare do anything to endanger the lives of others! When you drive, drive carefully!