- Lynn Belvedere: Mrs. King, as I told you last night, I dislike children intensely and yours, if I may say so, have peculiarly repulsive habits and manners.
- Tacey King: Mr. Belvedere, is there anything you haven't been?
- Lynn Belvedere: Yes, Mrs. King - I've never been an idler or a parasite.
- Lynn Belvedere: Mrs. King, I happen to dislike all children intensely. But I can assure you that I can readily attend to their necessary though unpleasant wants.
- Lynn Belvedere: I am, in my way, a philosopher.
- Harry King: Oh, I see, you just sit and think.
- Lynn Belvedere: Mr. King, if more people just sat and thought, the world might not be in the stinking mess that it is.
- Harry King: You know, Mrs. King, it's really all your fault.
- Tacey King: Hnh?
- Harry King: If you weren't so darned pretty, we wouldn't have so many kids for people to sit with.
- Harry King: Don't I get a kiss?
- Tacey King: Oh, no. I'm a one-man woman and my heart belongs to Belvedere.
- Harry King: [Talking with Tacey on the telephone] What? She didn't! Why the old bag.
- [He looks at Bill, his law partner]
- Harry King: The maid quit.
- Tacey King: In a way I'm glad to get rid of her. All she did was guzzle beer all day.
- Tacey King: The sooner you start out on your own and stop letting Mr. Hammond kick you around, the better I like it.
- Ginger: Gosh, Mrs. King. I hope you're not sore just because I invited a few friends. Golly, a person'd go absolutely insane with nothing to do but sit.
- Tacey King: If I were your mother, which heaven forbid, I'd make it extremely painful for you to sit for the next few days.
- Ginger: [to Harry after Tacey leaves to put the children back in bed] Gosh, Mr. King, I feel so sorry for you. She has a terrible disposition, hasn't she?
- Mr. Clarence Appleton: Oh, good morning, Mr. McPherson
- [who is carrying to the curb two metal trash cans full of empty beer and liquor bottles]
- Mr. Clarence Appleton: .
- Mr. McPherson: Hmmm.
- Mr. Clarence Appleton: Must have been quite a party you had last night.
- Mr. McPherson: Would you like a list of the guests who got cockeyed, or have you already got it?
- Mr. Clarence Appleton: There's no need to be unpleasant. I merely made a friendly observation.
- Mr. McPherson: Well, make it someplace else.
- Harry King: [Through the window he sees Clarence Appleton with a feather gathering pollen from their flowers] What the devil is he doing?
- Tacey King: Seems we have a very healthy male iris, and he asked if he could have some pollen so he could breed it to one of his.
- Harry King: You oughta charge him a stud fee.
- Tacey King: [Showing Mr. Belvedere his room] We, uh, tried to fix it up as nicely as we could. I hope you like it.
- Lynn Belvedere: [recoiling at particularly ugly sculptured bust] After the obvious eliminations have been made, I believe it will be entirely satisfactory. For my work I require an atmosphere of spartan simplicity.
- Tacey King: And may I ask what your profession is?
- Lynn Belvedere: Certainly. I am a genius.