The Shocking Miss Pilgrim (1947)

Betty Grable: Cynthia Pilgrim

Photos 

Quotes 

• Cynthia Pilgrim : I am a typewriter!

• John Pritchard : Miss Pilgrim, there's something I've been meaning to say to you.

  Cynthia Pilgrim : Yes, Mr. Pritchard?

  John Pritchard : As I was standing over there just now, I, uh, I was reviewing your... work here in the office, and I've come to the conclusion that I can see no reason why your employment shouldn't be continued on a permanent basis.

  Cynthia Pilgrim : Oh, Mr. Pritchard, I can't tell you how... Not only am I happy for myself, but just think, in only three days, I've succeeded in changing your viewpoint toward women working in offices.

  John Pritchard : I'm afraid that I still believe that a woman's place is in the home.

  Cynthia Pilgrim : Oh, but you... you just said that...

  John Pritchard : That I find you extremely capable. I might concede that some women are expert marksmen, but that's no reason to assume that I advocate a female army for the United States.

  Cynthia Pilgrim : If I may say so, Mr. Pritchard, that's a ridiculous point of view.

  John Pritchard : It's useless to argue the point, because I'll always say knife, and you'll always say scissors.

  Cynthia Pilgrim : What have knives and scissors got to do with it?

  John Pritchard : Don't you know that story?

  Cynthia Pilgrim : No

  John Pritchard : There was a man and his wife, devoted to each other, and could've been extremely happy except for one thing. It seems that when they were first married, he cut himself. He always claimed that he'd done it on a knife. His wife always maintained he'd done it on a pair of scissors. So for 50 years, they argued the point, and neither one of them would give an inch. One day, they were out fishing. The argument came up again. He said knife, she said scissors, he said knife, she said scissors. Finally, the old man got so mad that he picked up his wife and he threw her overboard. Then he waited for her to come up for the third time. And just before she slipped into her watery grave, he screamed "knife" at her. But the last thing to be seen slipping beneath the saves was her hand, and as it did so, the old man saw the fingers going

  [makes sign with his hands of scissors cutting] 

  John Pritchard : So, you see, it's quite simple. If we start an argument, let's remember the old man and the old woman, and we'll stop instantly. Agreed?

  Cynthia Pilgrim : Agreed.