The Bachelor Father (1931)

C. Aubrey Smith: Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : I am the first man ever to become a father by majority vote.

• Dr. Frank 'Mac' MacDonald : You're the most self-indulgent man I ever knew.

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : I devote my life to pleasing myself. Why shouldn't I? No family. No relatives, thank Heaven.

  Dr. Frank 'Mac' MacDonald : Well, you might have settled down and had children.

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Children! O-ho-ho! I've had 'em! Plenty of 'em!

  Dr. Frank 'Mac' MacDonald : What? You?

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Why not? No great feat. Anybody can do it. Even you have two sons.

  Dr. Frank 'Mac' MacDonald : Well, I like that! Basil, where are your children?

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Oh, dotted about the various points of the compass.

  Dr. Frank 'Mac' MacDonald : Well I must say, you're very casual about them.

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Well, they're nothing to me. Never seen 'em!

  Dr. Frank 'Mac' MacDonald : Why don't you send for your children? Make a home for them.

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : What? Fill this place with a lot of noisy ill-bred brats?

  [he chuckles] 

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : You've got a quaint sense of humour, Frank.

• Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : He'll never marry. He's all business. Not the marrying kind.

  Antoinette 'Tony' Flagg : I don't care whether he is or not. He'll fall, when the right girl comes along.

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : No girl's going to get John.

  Antoinette 'Tony' Flagg : Yeah? Well, those that live the longest, will see the most.

• Antoinette 'Tony' Flagg : We didn't pick you for a father! If we had, you wouldn't have been such a flop.

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : If you talk to me like that, I'll put you across my knee and give you a darn good spanking.

• Geoffrey Trent : How are we to address you?

  Antoinette 'Tony' Flagg : Yeah, what are we going to call ya?

  Geoffrey Trent : We feel that Sir Basil is a little too distant.

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Quite so. Of course, at the moment "father" is out of the question.

  John Ashley : I have it! Why not: Chief.

  Antoinette 'Tony' Flagg : That's it! Chief! We're all out of the same firehouse.

• Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Don't call it England!

  John Ashley : All right, England.

  [Tony giggles, Sir Basil spanks her behind] 

  John Ashley : Whoop!

• Maria Credaro : Miss Tony said that if you didn't get up when you were called, she'd come and pull you out of bed.

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Pull me out of bed?

  Maria Credaro : Yes, sir.

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : She'd do it!

  Maria Credaro : Yes, sir.

• Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Are you going balmy?

• Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : When I was young, girls never said these things. They never even thought them.

  Antoinette 'Tony' Flagg : That's why they never said them.

• Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : I've done nothing but spoil you.

  Antoinette 'Tony' Flagg : Why shouldn't you? Aren't I your favorite little accident?

• Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Yes, I'll still have Tony. And when you have Tony, you have your hands full.

• Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Well, they're gone.

  Antoinette 'Tony' Flagg : Gee, Chief, you talk as if they were dead.

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : I shall miss them.

  Antoinette 'Tony' Flagg : Oh, cheer up. I can annoy you enough for the whole bunch.

• Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : I shouldn't have let the twigs grow in the trees before transplanting them.

• Antoinette 'Tony' Flagg : I'm going away! And that's the whole thing in a nut hole. I mean, nut shell. I mean...

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Nut hole, is what you're trying to say.

  Antoinette 'Tony' Flagg : No it isn't! Nut *shell* is what I'm trying to say!

• Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : Children are a confounding nuisance, anyway. When they're around there's nothing but trouble and - and - and - and hooey!

  Larkin, the Butler : Yes, sir. Hooey.

• John Ashley : Sir Basil, I've been thinking this whole thing over. I'm a fool!

  Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : You consider that in the nature of - news?

• Sir Basil Algernon 'Chief' Winterton : You're just like your mother. She could charm the bird out of a tree. No matter what she did, she could always explain.