The Olympics Kick Things Off by Drowning The Minions
Today marks the official kickoff of the 2024 Olympic games, a celebration of athletic excellence, international cooperation, and… adorable, yet murderous, yellow cartoon blobs?
The Opening Ceremony featured a parade of boats traveling down the Seine river, as well as a performance from Lady Gaga, but all of these elements ended up being completely upstaged by the presence of the Minions.
Yes, for some reason, the broadcast included a segment in which we see the Minions in an underwater sub, just beneath the E. coli-tainted waters of the Seine, training for the Olympic games. Also, they seem to have stolen the Mona Lisa from the Louvre somehow. One Minion keeps tossing javelins, several of which end up piercing the vessel’s hull, causing the ship to fill with water, seemingly drowning all of the Minions. The “Mona Lisa” then bobs to the surface, in real life, presumably to remind visiting dignitaries...
The Opening Ceremony featured a parade of boats traveling down the Seine river, as well as a performance from Lady Gaga, but all of these elements ended up being completely upstaged by the presence of the Minions.
Yes, for some reason, the broadcast included a segment in which we see the Minions in an underwater sub, just beneath the E. coli-tainted waters of the Seine, training for the Olympic games. Also, they seem to have stolen the Mona Lisa from the Louvre somehow. One Minion keeps tossing javelins, several of which end up piercing the vessel’s hull, causing the ship to fill with water, seemingly drowning all of the Minions. The “Mona Lisa” then bobs to the surface, in real life, presumably to remind visiting dignitaries...
- 7/26/2024
- Cracked
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