Celia Imrie: Celia

Calendar Girls

Celia

Ruth: Well, I think it's a great idea.
Cora: You weren't concentrating, were you Ruth?
Ruth: I was. We're going to raise money to buy a sofa for the hospital in John's name.
Celia: By posing for a nude calendar!
Ruth: Oh no!
Chris: Oh sit down. I'm not asking you to straddle an 'Arley Davidson.
Celia: It's still a bit of a leap from Burnsall church, love.
Chris: That's the 'ole point. It's an alternative calendar, it's...
Annie: It's what John suggested.
Chris: Did he?
Annie: The last stage of the flower is the most glorious. So what this calendar would be saying is "actually, yes John, we agree".
Ruth: With respect, I didn't hear him use the phrase "whip your bras off"

Celia: [reading a fan mail letter] "I am currently in the high security wing of Her Majesty's Prison Barlinnie in Scotland and was mightily impressed by the sheer size of your-"

Jessie: [showing the photo of topless Chris Harper] What is the difference between this and the Venus de Milo?
Celia: Oh, I love quizzes. The cooker?
Jessie: Both feature women with their breasts exposed. What makes one a work of art?
Annie: I think the answer to that is very simple: an artist.

Cora: There's just one problem. The photographer's a man.
Jessie: But the point is, we won't be showing anything.
Cora: In the photos. I imagine a considerable amount will be on display in the room.
Chris: He'll have to be in the room to take the photos!
Cora: With us naked!
Celia: Yeah. Or nude.
Chris: No, listen. An art photographer doesn't see a naked woman. He sees a life model!
Celia: Yes. No, the nudity isn't important.
Jessie: Easy to say when you've got your knickers on.