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- Don't be fooled by the title, it's specially chosen to arouse your curiosity and make you want to see the film at all costs. It's actually a love story, not so much romantic as comic. A man and a woman meet not exactly by chance, they break up to see each other again the next day, they don't see each other again because she doesn't come to the meeting, and then they meet again by chance after a while. Will they stay together this time?
- He doesn't work for CIA, NSA, KGB, MI5, MI6, Mossad, French or Chinese Intelligence, he works for Gagauz Secret Services, he is Very Very Secret Agent Cochon. After 4 films and countless situations in which he behaved like a retard, Cochon got fed up. Aware that he's a moron (billions of individuals are not even aware), Cochon will make a change of huge proportions. Not waiting for Bill Gates or Klaus Schwab to insert their microchip, Cochon will insert his own microchip, which will make him immortal and all-powerful.
- The night after Halloween, in a house located somewhere on the outskirts, a lonely woman hears very strange noises coming from beyond the door of her room. In a first phase, going out into the corridor to see what it's about, she doesn't see anything at all, she only thinks she hears heavy breathing from somewhere. But what follows next, is hard to imagine even by the mind of the most versed Horror author.
- It is the funny story of a single man who is used to finding all kinds of objects, things that English people usually forget or lose on trains and subways. What our hero fails to find is a woman, a life partner. Or does he not know how and where to look?
- Traces of the famous Yeti have been seen all over the world. Many of them turned out to be just fakes. The media also calls him Sasquatch, ape, bear-like figure, Bigfoot or Wildman. But now we are in the vast Epping Forest where there are enormous footprints and even a shelter. Many women declared that met him. Some of them they said that they were raped by a creature like a ghost.
- A lonely lady is looking for Yeti in the forest to benefit from some intimate pleasure in exchange for a bottle of beer. She finds him and dances a tango together, although neither of them has any experience as dancers, she not being a Ginger Rogers or Cyd Charisse, he not being a Fred Astaire. But, miraculously, they both manage to dance very well, even better than Paul (Marlon Brando) and Jeanne (Maria Schneider) from "Last Tango in Paris". But towards the end of the dance, something absolutely surprising will happen, Yeti's identity will be revealed.
- In the very near future, when you turn 64, the government offers you a free visit to one of the nearest crematoriums. It is a one-way visit only.
- The very very secret agent Cochon is back, this is Part 3 of his adventures. Relentless, he continues to look for the spy with a huge ass, it seems that he found her this time, she is hiding in a crater, Copermic, on the Moon.
- The invasion started long time before the villain press to begin the infamous campaign.
- Being a polyglot is a rare gift. Only elevated initiates like Furculision Fourchette possess the grace of the language gods, he, The French Teacher, speaks impeccably the language of Shakespeare and Byron, the language of Moliere and Corneille, plus other Latin and non-Latin languages. And, one of the special Latin languages, the language of infinite beauty, is the Romanian language, the one in which individuals such as Caragiale and Eminescu expressed themselves with divine grace. Is he Genius, is he just an epigone?
- Henry, an alien from Ugnutuhk, a dead planet, comes to Earth to look for Lily, the only woman which escaped by teleportation, after the hidden star beyond the Sun exploded.
- A vampire is discovered during a dance with a woman who accidentally knocks off his wig.
- Cochon is the worst secret agent, he has not caught and will never catch a spy.
- A rather strange individual approaches a lady in the forest, showing her some panties and asking her to come with him to try them on at his house.
- It's a pure parody of the times we live in. My films always have messages, you don't have to be a genius to understand them. Sometimes maybe more subtle, even subliminal. One such example from this production is the character Bruce Lee Ciung, who fights against the Chinese authorities without having hands, like the brave young Chinese who recently rebelled against the totalitarian dictatorial regime in China, like those in Tiananmen Square in 1989, without to have hands being the metaphor. I won't explain everything, just watch the movie, it's really very special. It's a sketch film in which you will see (or discover for the first time) the amazing Sonya Namik, Simona Larka, Nick Field, Geoff Brooks, David Barker and last but not least Rodrig Andrisan,
- Who knows me, knows that I love animals, very much, and they love me in turn, because they can feel who is a good man and who is not. I had extraordinary experiences, true manifestations of love, with dogs, cows, horses and, especially, cats. This movie is about one of them, a recent experience with a cat.
- The adventures of the very secret agent Cochon become more and more unique and complex, as in no other film ever made on Planet Earth. The main stake is no longer the English "Fish and Chips" meal, but the traditional Romanian SARMALE, all the world powers want to have the recipe and would do anything to get it. Cochon will meet Jacinda Goering von der Loo again, disguised as a witch. He will expose her and have the sweet satisfaction of revenge. He will meet the terrible Yo Tzion Ping, the greatest Chinese secret agent, who wants the sarmale's recipe for the Chinese people. He will meet the man of the bushes, Opitek Ogotai Pingelik, who also wants the recipe for sarmale. Throughout the events, Cochon will learn that he is not the only depressed secret agent, he will meet also Matacambe, a finished secret agent, much more depressed than him. Cochon, in his despair, will talk, again, to a plastic man in the street. And, he will also meet a very strange coroner, Hilda, who operates on some unusual corpses, who is more drunk than sober and has a Teddy Bear as a secret lover. He will also meet Infidel Castron (a copy of Fidel Castro) and Nelu Mandel Bafto Delo Del (a copy of Nelson Mandela). Cochon will show that he's indestructible and will survive all these very bloody and extremely lethal confrontations.
- More than 7000 years ago, on planet Khutungu, there was a terrible android army, they conquered the whole Universe. Now they are extinct. This is the story of the last of them.
- What's the real secret of longevity?
- Short
- With a black hood on her head and a big gun in one hand, a schoolgirl in the 3rd grade is chasing her teacher, because she thinks she's too smart and wants to be promoted to the 5th grade.
- It's the most beautiful time of the year, the long-awaited Christmas. But Santa Claus doesn't come anymore, everyone is waiting for him and he got lost, almost dead drunk somewhere in London... Another Santa Claus comes and steals everything he finds in houses, some kind of Robin Hood, he steals from the rich to give to the poor. .. The carolers only have hosts like Scrooge and instead of money they get eggs on their heads... A very well-known ancient character of about 2,000 years has to multiply some loaves and some fish again... And, in all this time, the fire burns brightly in the hearths of Buckingham and Balmoral palaces.
- These are the new adventures of the very very secret agent Cochon, this time very surreal and also very lethal. After arresting himself and spending 10 minutes in prison, Cochon follows again in the footsteps of the fat, huge-ass spy woman. He will face a very cunning arms dealer, Ringfinger, two Chinese spy women, he will be on the verge of being shot by one of them, saved at the last moment by Ringfinger, etc. etc., but at the end of the day, very tired, he seeks refuge in the Alfred Hitchcock Hotel, run by an eccentric and strange individual. Of course, he will not capture the dangerous spy woman. Will he ever catch her?
- A lonely lady is looking for Yeti in the forest to benefit from some intimate pleasure. She finds him and dances a tango together, although neither of them has any experience as dancers, she not being a Ginger Rogers or Cyd Charisse, he not being a Fred Astaire. But, miraculously, they both manage to dance very well, even better than Paul (Marlon Brando) and Jeanne (Maria Schneider) from "Last Tango in Paris". But towards the end of the dance, something absolutely surprising will happen, Yeti's identity will be revealed.
- Soho, London, United Kingdom. The heaven of artists, musicians and, last but not least, pimps and prostitutes. And, because it is illegal, from time to time, you can see some undercover cops making an arrest.
- This film has amazing, breathtaking views of the river Thames, inside London, by night. Great, exciting music by the super gifted Danish musician Torben Friedrich alias ToXyGeNeDK.
- Wait until you'll see my tongue.
- Everybody has to leave the Earth
- One night, strange creepy noises are heard in the house. A hand with a loaded gun takes a look.
- It's the year 2020. Cameron, Putin, Obama, everybody knows now, they are all aliens. The global situation is purely catastrophic. Even The Queen lives now on benefits on Mars - on chocolate Mars. Who will save the world? Maybe Kim Kardashian or Winston Churchill - Not those famous Winston Churchill and Kim Kardashian but, two not so special and not so secret agents with the same names.
- And the Oscar for the Best Actor goes to - another French actor.
- It's a spectacular film about the wonderful appearance of London each year in the month of December, specially around Christmas, with images and music that take your breath away, catching those amazing lights, decorations, Christmas trees and many many other attractions.
- This movie is nothing more than a parody of those "dumb movies" in which the characters shoot endlessly, dozens and hundreds of bullets without reloading the weapons. And the victims, like the famous example of Hrundi V. Bakshi (Peter Sellers in "The Party") practically do not want to die, even though they are shot dozens and hundreds of times. The film also parodies those fake artists, such as the many who think they are actors, musicians, etc.
- Rodrig Andrisan is a globetrotter by birth. In real life. He traveled on foot his "native" Romania and a good part of his "adoptive" United Kingdom. (Actually, he's from another planet...) Now he's trying to conquer Spain, starting with Palma de Mallorca. Not knowing the way to the highest point of the island, he has first a conversation with a horse...
- It is said that interacting with a clown can be frightening. In 2016, the "killer clown" phenomenon began, with more and more video footage and reports of creepy clowns doing strange and unsettling things in cities around the world. Time called it "clown hysteria." This is because clowns became major characters in horror movies. Watching Stephen King's "It" or "Poltergeist" can be enough to make most people afraid of clowns. It is also said that the first circus clown was Philip Astley, who created what is considered the first circus in England in 1768. But clowns are not what they appear to be. 250 years after, England again, in London, this guy try to scare someone: 1 % Hitchcockian, 99 % Andrisanian.
- For a man with a special condition from a planet in the Alpha Centauri, it's not so easy to find a female partner on Earth.
- He, the beggar, did nothing but ask for some coins. They, all seven, they answered with hate and contempt. Now, they are all seven dead, killed one by one, in the most unusual ways.
- It is said that Jesus had no female wife and He was completely a single and lonely man. Well, that's the spirit here too.
- He was once the greatest samurai. The most feared ever. Now he is nothing more than a lonely man and a dishonored samurai for disappointing his master Tinky Winky and Chewbacca. So he decided to commit an honorable Seppuku. But, he keeps postponing it from day to day. Not because he is a coward, not because he doesn't have a kaishakunin (assistant) to cut his head, but because he wants to perform a perfect Seppuku.
- Do you know the myth of Sisyphus? Hades punished him for cheating death twice by forcing him to roll an immense boulder up a hill only for it to roll down every time it neared the top, repeating this action. Have you heard also of Hotei? He is the Japanese god of happiness, laughter and the wisdom of contentment, and is the patron of the weak and children, fortunetellers and bartenders. In Chinese Buddhism he is known as Budai, the Loving or Friendly One and he is also known as the Laughing Buddha. According to Chinese legend he carried a sack of candy to give to children. He is sometimes worshiped as a god of good luck and prosperity. This is the story of Sisyphus Hotei, a contemporary reincarnation of those two.
- I hate people, I hate life, I hate everything.
- Poetry can be deep, poetry can be bold and provocative and poetry can be more than poetry, can be the funniest thing in the world. Clitoris pecata mundi, labia minora anima mea, labia majora anima tua. Mea maxima culpa, tua maxima vulva.
- On December 29, 2013, Missing Persons Helpline UK received a call about the disappearance of a little girl near a forest located in North-West of London. On site were found only the remains of a half eaten adult male.
- The sublime Cazzollini, the greatest musician of all time, god of ecstasy and intellectual orgasm, great-grandson of the great Stradivarius, invited by Her Majesty to perform at the Royal Palace, in these days, event similar to the sinking of the Titanic, when the orchestra was continuing to play while the cold cold water penetrated deeper and deeper into the depths of the ship.
- There are two monsters here, I know, I personally met them.
- Answering the call of a mysterious alien woman, The Fixer is going in an undisclosed location.