- [from trailer]
- Colt Seavers: [preparing his dog, sitting next to him in a truck, for a jump] I'll buy you a drink after this is over! Engage your core!
- [cut to Colt icing his fist in a frozen margarita with the dog sitting next to him lapping up a drink in a beer glass]
- [from trailer]
- Jody Moreno: I'm the director. You're a stunt guy. We need to keep it super profesh.
- Colt Seavers: Profesh is my middle name.
- Jody Moreno: You said your middle name was Danger.
- Colt Seavers: That's my stage name.
- [from trailer]
- Jody Moreno: You are literally the last person on Earth I wanna see. I'd slap the shit outta you. I really could.
- Colt Seavers: And I'm open to that in a safer environment.
- [from trailer]
- Colt Seavers: [after a fight; talking to Jody] I had no choice. I had to do some Jason Bourne shit!
- Colt Seavers: I'm just a boy in a neon suit, standing in front of a girl, reminding her that Notting Hill is her favorite movie. And she watches Love Actually every year of Christmas.
- [from trailer]
- Jody Moreno: You fall down, you get right back up. How far would you go for the one that you love?
- Dan Tucker: But it ain't about how hard you can hit. It's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward.
- Colt Seavers: Nah, man! You can't quote Rocky on me like that!
- Colt Seavers: Tom, you need carbs! Your brain runs on glucose! For simple cognitive functions, you need them!
- Tom Ryder: It's high noon at the edge of the universe, folks. Now, we're facing a powerful enemy. An alien species born of the worst of humanity's traits. Well, what our enemy doesn't see is that their demise is imminent. And the most powerful weapon in all galaxy? Love. Inside each and every one of you is a spark, baby. An ember. A goddamn fire! Love is how we will win. And even if we lose, we're gonna die fighting for a happy ending!
- Doone: No offence, but I prefer cartoons. See, movies are always trying to make things real. But it's not real. It's a movie. It's not meant to be real. That's why I like cartoons. Y'see, 'cause cartoons don't pretend to be real.