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Saving Private Ryan (1998)
The Greatest War Film of All Time
This review is to commemorate the 80th anniversary of D-Day and a dedication to all of the valiant Allied soldiers who sacrificed their lives that fateful day, as well as all the surviving veterans. But I must provide a warning that this movie isn't for the faint of heart at all. It contains realistic depictions of warfare that are extremely gruesome and frightening.
All my life I've been a World War II buff. Watching this way back in 1998 not only solidified my interest in studying the conflict, but absolutely captivated me. Saving Private Ryan is the greatest and most realistic war movie I've ever seen, and my all-time favorite Stephen Spielberg picture.
Loosely based on the four real life Niland brothers, "Saving Private Ryan" takes place during the Allied liberation of France in World War II. Ranger Captain John H. Miller (Tom Hanks) and his squad are assigned with rescuing 101st Airborne Private James Francis Ryan (Matt Damon), who has a ticket home after losing his three older brothers in combat.
Spielberg pulled no punches directing such a realistic war film that even World War II veterans were stunned or moved to tears by. The action scenes aren't meant to be fun or awesome like some war flicks, but instead are terrifyingly gory and melancholy, especially the infamous depiction of the landings on Omaha Beach. You'll see men set on fire, missing limbs, or blown apart by explosives. Their screams and sobs of agony are genuinely spine-chilling. The very waves of the beach are dyed red by the end of the harrowing scene. It truly emphasizes the old saying: "War is hell".
Nevertheless, there are some moments of humor or heartwarming to provide levity between the action scenes. Ryan and Reiben both tell amusing stories of events happening before they're shipped off to basic training. There is genuine camaraderie and respect shared between the squamates that makes them likeable and the emotional toll inflicted on them by the horrors of war is palpable, especially for Captain Miller. Hearing them talk about their civilian lives or stories of their mothers back home helps the audience emphasize with them.
The sound effects are top-notch and create a hellish, nail-biting war-zone cacophony, from whizzing bullets, thunderous explosions, and gunfire, as well as indistinct shouting and blood-curdling screams of dying and wounded men. Other sound effects, such as the roaring engines of vehicles, such as tanks, planes, and landing craft add more to the tense setting.
John Williams score, although limited, is still great and poignant during dramatic or heart wrenching scenes, such as the gritty aftermath of the Omaha assault, Wade and Miller's deaths, and an elderly Ryan visiting the Normandy American Cemetary decades after the battle of Ramelle, hoping he's earned the sacrifices made to save his life. Even then, the lack of music during the action scenes makes the film even more absorbing for viewers.
The cinematography was brilliant with a mixture of conventional and handheld cameras. In the latter's case, its constant shakiness makes you feel as though you're actually there in the middle of the battle. The setting's faded colors are a nice touch as well, as if the entire word is exhausted and decaying from being at war for so long. The production value is excellent, with attention paid to every detail, such as uniforms, weapons, vehicles, buildings, etc. Everything feels truly authentic for the time period.
Overall, Saving Private Ryan, as gruesome and dark as it is, is still a masterpiece of a film and a classic tale of courage, sacrifice, morality, and brotherhood to be remembered for generations to come, arguably making it the greatest war movie of all time.
Hearts of Iron IV (2016)
Greatest WWII Strategy Game Of All Time
This is hands down my all-time favorite strategy game, thanks in no small part to me being a big World War II buff and a fan of strategy games. I've literally have spent hundreds of hours playing it, and I still find it fun today.
You can begin your campaign from either 1936 or 1939. You'll have nearly 200 countries to choose from, including the major powers at the time: Nazi Germany, the United States, the United Kingdom, the Soviet Union, the Empire of Japan, and the Third French Republic.
The potential for creating your own alternate history within this titanic conflict is practically infinite. Want to conquer the UK before invading Russia as Nazi Germany and ultimately win the war? Go right ahead. Turn America into a fascist dictatorship and join the Axis? Not a problem. Start World War III as Russia and go to war against the Allies once the Axis are out of the picture? Nothings stopping you.
You can eventually command a military sizing in the millions with support from tanks, aircraft, artillery, naval vessels, and, with sufficient research, even nuclear weapons. To keep your war industry up and running, you'll construct factories, refineries, roads, railroads, and dockyards. You can organize your divisions into armies or entire army groups under the command of your hand-picked generals and field marshals. You'll even be able to design your own divisions from the ground up and decide what weapons or equipment they'll be issued.
You can research new weapons, vehicles, tactics, industrial and research methods, and others to improve your performance against your enemies. You can also implement different doctrines for each branch military branches that differ in the bonuses they provide. You'll also have the option of choosing progressive paths called focus trees that may be based on real historical events and situations or be completely alternative historical possibilities that vary in the benefits they give.
You can spend political points on vital decisions, such as economic policies, war plans, justifying war goals, fighting rival political parties and others. You'll also spend them to appoint government officials, joint chiefs of staff, employ production companies, etc. You must spend them carefully to achieve optimum efficiency in your strategic goals.
Hearts of Iron IV is a masterpiece game, and the fact there are still updates and DLCs being released for it speaks volumes of its success. Plus, the bugs and glitches are at a minimum, so you can expect clean, unimpeded gameplay. There is a lot to learn, and it takes time to get used to the game's features, but it's worth it. Try it today if you're into strategy games and World War II.
Dino Crisis 3 (2003)
A tragic end to a good franchise
As a fan of the first two games, this was a big disappointment for me when I played it back in the day. It only took thirty minutes for me to give up in frustration, thanks to one crucial reason that I'll get to.
First of all, the game barely even feels like Dino Crisis. It doesn't cast Regina or Dylan as the main characters. There's no third energy or time travel involved either. Instead, it's set in the distant future as a team named S. O. A. R. is sent to investigate the Ozymandias, a colony ship believed to have disappeared without a trace three centuries. Once aboard, the team discovers the ship is filled with dinosaur like monsters and must uncover the mysteries surrounding the vessel.
Similar to Dino Crisis 2, this is an action/adventure game rather than survival horror. You'll spend most of the game playing as S. O. A. R. trooper Patrick Tyler, who is outfitted with an energy rifle and boost pack to travel around fast and leap from platform to platform. The core gameplay of killing dinosaurs is relatively solid, and the controls are easy to get used to.
But the action aspect feels lackluster, as there's a very limited number of non-boss enemies to fight, unlike in Dino Crisis 2. They aren't even actual dinosaurs, just hybrids created via genetic engineering.
The graphics and level design are admittingly good and the FMVs are beautifully animated. I liked the enemy designs especially; they look like dinosaur hybrids designed by HR Geiger. The Ozymandias has a polished and metallic setting you'd expect in such a futuristic game. But for the most part, the ship is barren and empty, so it feels boring as you explore it.
But the worst aspect of all is the horrible camera, which involves both fixed and mobile angles. 90% of the time, you will be unable to even see the enemies and you'll have to fire at them off screen and hope you score a hit. The platforming sections of the game are just as aggravating. Part of this can be faulted with the cameras inability to keep pace with Patrick as he zooms around on his boost pack. No question, the camera ruined this game for many players, including me.
Overall, Dino Crisis 3 isn't a bad game, but it's undoubtedly inferior to the previous two installments and, as far as I can tell, ended the Dino Crisis franchise.
Zeruda no densetsu: Mujura no kamen (2000)
The Darkest Zelda Game and One of the Best
When I first rented this as a kid, I was frustrated and confused by the morbid story and time-based plot, so I returned it. It wasn't until several years later as a teenager that I replayed it and came to cherish it so much today. In fact, I could play it over and over and still enjoy it.
Link embarks on a secret quest to find an old friend, presumably Navi. Unfortunately, he winds up in the strange new world of Termina where a Skullkid possessing a mysterious and powerful mask threatens to destroy the world by causing the moon to fall. Now, it's up to Link and his new fairy companion, Tatl, to save Termiba via a long, arduous, time-travelling adventure.
This is undoubtedly the darkest and most frightening entry in the Zelda series. In the first ten minutes alone, Link becomes stranded in a strange and unfamiliar world, is transformed into a Deku Scrub, the Ocarina of Time has been stolen, and Epona is missing and presumed dead. Then you discover that the world is going to end in three days as the moon slowly descends on a crash course to Termina. But that's what it makes it so amazing and memorable.
The time-based gameplay was very unique for an N64 game. Although you can travel back as many times as you want, the limited amount you have before the moon falls creates a sense of urgency and emphasizes the importance of completing your quest. Within the three-day time span, multiple events are set in stone that you can either ignore or participate it, making small but rewarding changes in the three-day time space you constantly repeat.
The game is much more immersive that Ocarina of Time with its characters. Most of the NPCs were nameless cardboard cutouts that contributed little, if anything to the story or gameplay. Here, the characters are fully fleshed out, interact with each other, and you'll feel a strong emotional connection to them as you learn about and help resolve their troubles. Their melancholy and despairing attitude over the impending apocalypse will genuinely tug on your heartstrings as well. The end of the Anju and Kafei quest in particular is one of the most poignant and bittersweet moments in the entire series.
I especially liked masks being a central theme to the game. In addition to the twenty ordinary masks, you'll also acquire transformative masks that allow you to morph into a Deku Scrub, Goron, and Zora version of Link with their very own different abilities. Collecting every mask in the game will even net you a special reward that'll make the final boss a cakewalk.
Nevertheless, the game has its drawbacks. There are multiple tedious side-quests and mini-games that are more difficult than in Ocarina of Time, although they do help elongate the overall playing length. Speaking of which, there are only four dungeons, but they are much longer and more difficult than in Ocarina of Time.
Furthermore, due to rushed development, there are many recycled character models and a shortage of new weapons and items (expect for the masks) that makes the game feel a bit recycled. To a lesser extent, there are several re-used songs from Ocarina of Time as well, but there is plenty of new music to make up for it, such as Clocktowns theme, which becomes increasingly frantic as the moon comes closer, and the bone-chilling theme song of Majora's Mask itself. The new Ocarina songs are also catchy and beautiful, and the opportunity to play different instruments as Deku, Goron, or Zora Link even allows you to perform as a band late in the game.
While not as good or memorable as Ocarina of Time, Majora's Mask is still a masterpiece in its own right and has a special place in the franchise's history, as well as many a gamers heart.
Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door (2024)
An Excellent and Beautiful Remake
This was one of my all-time favorite Mario games when I was a kid. Playing a revamped version again twenty years later was a dream come true.
For those of you new to this game, you'll control Mario on another paper-style RPG adventure to rescue Princess Peach, uncover a lost treasure, and save the world from a new enemy. At certain intervals, you'll control Peach and even King Bowser.
The game takes after Color Splash and Oragami king with its polished appearance and more realistic 3D graphics, such as lighting, shading and others. The colors are brighter and more vibrant and beautiful than ever before. New camera angles add a more cinematic feel during certain scenes. Even the opening story contains a pop-up book style narration instead of simple pictures.
The music has been remixed in a way that is quite good. I especially liked the final boss theme. There is some new dialogue as well that differs from the original, but not in a detrimental way. The characters now emit voice blips during dialogue in a fashion similar to Banjo Kazooie which adds more life and charm to them, as do their new gestures and facial expressions.
There are plenty of new gameplay features available that expand the game from the original, such as the ability and switch partners on the spot, new items and badges, faster pipe travelling, the opportunity to unlock special galleries for art and sounds, etc.
This is a must play for Mario fans and especially retrogamers who enjoyed the original version.
Dino Crisis 2 (2000)
Definitely better than the first game
Now, this is the game I wish the first Dino Crisis was. In fact, with the exception of Turok: Dinosaur Hunter, this was my favorite dinosaur game of all.
One year after the first game, Dr. Kirks research on Third Energy is seized by the government, but their reckless research efforts result in another time distortion accident that sends the research facility, a military base, and a small town to another time. Now SORT agent Regina and TRAT soldier Dylan Morton travel through time to rescue any survivors and gather data on the Third Energy project.
Instead of a stressful survival horror game riddled with puzzles, this is a straight up run-and-gun style action game with some arcade elements, such as collecting extinction points from killing enemies or bonus points for avoiding damage. You'll control both Regina and Dylan in different intervals of the game, both characters having different weapons and abilities.
The dinosaurs are much weaker, and you'll slaughter them by the hundreds to rack up points to spend on equipment, such as health items, new weapons, ammunition, and armor. Your armament is even bigger and more lethal than ever before, allowing you to wield weapons such as a machine gun, flamethrower, anti-tank rifle, and even rocket launchers.
The graphics have improved since the first game, with more fluid character and enemy animation, even outside the FMVs, but there are fixed camera angles due to the much larger scope of the game. The controls are smoother, and the menu and item handling are improved as well.
The environment is much more diverse and colorful, from lush jungles, to a research facility with an underwater segment, to a ruined city. New enemy dinosaurs have entered the fray, such as Allosaurus, Triceratops, Mosasaurus, and one particular dinosaur that I won't spoil for you.
The action-based soundtrack was great, especially the final boss music "Anti-Satellite Attack". The sound effects were cool too, from weapons to the dinosaurs.
Overall, this is a great Capcom classic and a must play for fans of both Capcom and dinosaur games.
Dino Crisis (1999)
Put "Resident Evil" and "Jurassic Park" in a blender, and this is the result
Any fan of survival horror games, both old and new, must give this Capcom classic a try.
It's the year 2009. Dr. Edward Kirk, believed to have died in an accident three years prior, is discovered alive and continuing his research on a remote island called Ibis. Red headed S. O. R. T. agent, Regina, and her teammates, Gail, Rick, and Cooper are sent in to apprehend the scientist, only to discover the facility is inexplicably overrun by vicious dinosaurs. Now Regina and her team must capture Kirk and escape, and discover just where the dinosaurs came from in first place...
You'll control red-headed agent Regina and guide her through a research facility with only three weapons, the handgun, shotgun, grenade launcher.
Instead of slow, weak, and dim-witted zombies, you'll battle quick, cunning, and tough dinosaurs of various species. Velociraptors are the most common threat. Others include the swift flying Pteranodon, the small and annoying Compsognathus, and the unrealistic but lethal Therizinosaurus. Rounding them out is the mighty T-Rex, who is invulnerable to all of your weapons, and it's attacks almost always result in instant death.
The game has more advanced features than Resident Evil titles released the same year, with fully rendered 3D environments, the ability to move and aim at the same time, a mobile camera, and others.
The sound effects are great, especially the dinosaurs, from the raptor's blood curdling shrieks and hisses to the T-Rex thunderous roar. The voice acting was good too; Stephanie Morgenstern did a nice job voicing Regina.
Like its sister franchise, Dino Crisis relies on solving various puzzles and collecting key items to advance. The horror aspect is quite strong. You'll discover the mutilated or half-eaten corpses of the facilities staff, the Velociraptors behave much like the Xenomorphs from the alien franchise, ambushing you from windows and vent shafts. Plus, the scare cords and music are outright hair-raising during jump scare encounters.
The games main downside are the puzzles, which can be tedious and frustrating. Plus, the enemies are total bullet sponges, so you'll likely spend more time running away from than fighting them. The narrow corridors you often encounter them in and their ability to sometimes follow you through doors adds to the tension. There's more emphasis on survival than combat, given the scarcity of ammo and relative weakness of your weapons.
While it didn't reach the same level of success as the better-known Resident Evil, Dino Crisis was still a remarkable addition to the survival horror genre.
E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial (1982)
The Biggest Disaster in Video Game History
It's no wonder Atari buried thousands of these cartridges in a landfill. Not only did it drive the once mighty Atari company out of business, but it even caused the great video game crash of 1983 that nearly destroyed the entire business. Yes, it was truly THAT bad.
Your objective is to guide ET across multiple screens on a single level to collect three separate phone parts to phone home and escape planet Earth, all the while avoiding government agents and scientists trying to hinder your progress, as well as holes inexplicably dug everywhere. Your life meter is displayed at the bottom of the screen. If it reaches zero, Elliot comes along to revive you. If you lose three lives, it's game over. That's all you do.
It's painfully obvious that the production for this game took a mere five weeks. First of all, the gameplay is totally aggravating. You'll be constantly falling into the holes that are not only numerous but very difficult to avoid due to their size and prevalence. The bad hit detection and clunky controls only made it more infuriatingly difficult. But that's not all. Even for an Atari game, the graphics are bad. ET is just a sickly green blob with eyes. The level designs are completely dull and bland, the sound effects are poor. You get the idea.
In the end, this was just a disastrous attempt at a cash grab of an otherwise awesome and successful movie. Even if you're a hardcore ET fan, don't even play this for free. Just stick with the movie.
Jet Force Gemini (1999)
A Sci-Fi Classic From Rare
This was one of my all-time favorite N64 games from Rare while growing up. It may not have been as successful as Banjo Kazooie or Goldeneye, but it still shares a special place in my heart. It's an interesting and fun sci-fi game with bothaction/adventure and shoot-em-up elements.
In the distant future, an interplanetary insectoid tyrant named Mizar and his army of Drones has invaded the planet Goldwood and enslaved a peaceful bear-like species named Tribals. Fortunately, the remnants of Jet Force Gemini, consisting of twin siblings, Juno and Vela and their canine companion, Lupus, arrive at the planet to defeat Mizar, save the Tribals, and eventually, planet Earth itself.
You'll travel across 15 diverse worlds, such as Goldwood itself, a forest world, the barren and cold Cerulean, through the innards of a gargantuan space worm on the volcanic world Eschebone, and Ichor, a Drone military base with a swanky nightclub. These huge levels providing plenty of opportunities to explore and are split into separate zones interconnected by doors that act as checkpoints.
You are given access to quite an armament of futuristic weapons to combat Mizars forces, such as a laser pistol, machine gun, shotgun, and the ever popular and lethal Tri-Rocket launcher. Throwables, such as grenades, remote and proximity mines, and flares are also available. You'll have the chance to collect ammunition crates and Gemini containers to increase your overall ammo capacity and health respectively. You'll need them.
The music was by far the best aspect of the game and is some of the best you'll ever hear on the N64. Robin Beanland. Graeme Norgate, and Alistair Lindsay all outdid themselves composing such a majestic and awe-inspiring space opera esqe soundtrack that'll remind anyone of "Star Wars". "SS Anubis" and "Sekhment" were the best in my opinion.
Unfortunately, this game isn't without noticeable flaws. The controls are wonky, especially when dealing with certain enemies that require manual aiming, such as shield or sniper drones. Even today modern controls barely mitigate the difficulty.
There are several minigames that are either enjoyable or infuriating to play. The enjoyable ones are classic 2-D racing game in the arcade at the "Big Bug Fun Club" 3D at Mizar's palace that shares similar features in "Diddy Kong Racing" released in 1997. But the non-enjoyable ones are the five Floyd missions. The narrow corridors, tight turns, multiple small pickups and atrocious controls make these infuriating. Worse still, you're required to complete two of them to beat the game.
But the most aggravating part of all is saving the Tribals, which is your primary objective. Some being harder to save than others makes this especially tedious and time-consuming objective, because if even one dies, you must start over again. The worst part of all is that you must rescue every. Single. One in order to beat the game.
Despite these flaws, Jet Force Gemini is a great game and a must play for retro gamers who enjoyed Rare's other releases.
Blast Corps (1997)
A lost gem from Rare
There were several gems on the N64 that are forgotten today to some extent. Blast Corps is one of them. While not the most famous game released, it was its first released on the N64 and undoubtedly helped make their mark on the platform.
You control a Blast Corp. Recruit clad in green clothing. Your primary objective is to clear a path for a runaway nuclear missile carrier by any means necessary to prevent it from detonating.
You'll control an assortment of vehicles ranging from a bulldozer, muscle cars, a dump truck, and even thirty-foot tall robots. Occasionally you must exit your vehicle to quickly commandeer another one to accomplish your mission
The music, composed by Graeme Norgate, is quite good. It mainly consists of a lively and metallic mix of 70s style pop music and urgent music you'd hear in disaster movies. There are even a few particularly catchy fan- favorites, such as "Time to Get Moving" , "Simian Acres", which has a country, Cotton-Eye Joe sort of vibe, and the "Replay" is quite notable too.
The sound effects and graphics were great. You'll hear realistic tire screeching from your vehicles, explosions and crashing sounds throughout as you plow through buildings.
There's more to the game than destruction and puzzle solving. Given the sheer size of the maps combined with hidden features, such as satellite dishes and scientists add a bit of adventurism and exploration.
My main complaint is the difficulty in controlling certain vehicles, especially the infamous Backlash with its frustrating skidding attack. There's also the repetitiveness of the missions. Of course, the fun factor of smashing things with construction vehicles holds up for a while, but not forever.
Although it didn't reach the same level of success as Banjo Kazooie or Goldeneye (also released by Rare) it's still a cult classic that is fondly remembered by many players who grew up in the 90s, including myself. I highly recommend this to people with a Nintendo Switch with an interest in Retro games.
Earthworm Jim 3D (1999)
Poor Jim simply didn't make the cut to 3D
Having enjoyed the first two games and the cartoon as a kid, I excitedly rented this game on the spot from Blockbuster, expecting another wacky, fun game. Instead, I was introduced to a disappointing and unsuccessful transition from 2D to 3D that essentially destroyed the Earthworm Jim franchise.
Jim has been rendered comatose by a falling cow and is bed-ridden at a hospital. Jim's brain releases his super-ego, which descends deep into the depths of his mind in a last-ditch effort to prevent total insanity. The game takes place entirely inside Jim's mind, which is divided into four different hubs: memories, happiness, fear, and fantasy. In traditional 3D platforms at the time, Jim's main objective is to gather golden udders and green marbles to restore his sanity. You can easily see a similarity to collecting notes and Jiggys in Banjo Kazooie respectively.
The game lacked the imagination of the previous Sega Genesis titles. I find this inexcusable, because of the game took place within Jim's mind. The creative possibilities were endless, but what we got was bland and unimpressive.
The music isn't terrible for the most part, but I found most of the songs to be too short, so you'll probably hear them loop multiple times on any given level. This can become outright annoying on levels like "Coup D'etat" and "Hungry Tonite". They really should have cut down on the accordion.
The gameplay was a mix of third person run and gun and a collectathon, which wouldn't be bad if not for one glaring flaw you'll soon learn about. And, as befitting an Earthworm Jim game, you have access to an arsenal of wacky weapons besides our hero's standard blaster. You can wield a meat cleaver launcher, laser gun, and an old-fashioned six-shooter.
The sound effects were good, consisting of an amusing mix of Jim screaming, animal noises, kooky weapon sounds, and others that gave it the typical "Earthworm Jim" feeling. Plus, the voice acting from legendary voice actors, Jim Castellaneta, Jim Cummings reprised their roles from the cartoon was a nice touch for me.
The graphics are acceptable for an N64 game, which could only hold so much memory on that cartridge. Even so, most of the level designs are large, barren, and unpolished. The character models looked chunky and untextured. Jim's mouth isn't even visible.
The controls for Jim are manageable for the most part. But I CAN'T say the same about the horrible camera controls. The camera is cumbersome occasionally even gets stuck on corners. I think I spent more time wrestling with and adjusting the camera than actually playing the game.
The worst part of the game is the boss battles. Instead of conventional fights, Jim uses a pig as a surfboard to engage his enemies in a marble collecting match. Not only is this concept dull and tedious, but the horrible pig controls and flawed camera make the boss battles outright agonizing. For me, this was the final straw and I quit playing when I was unable to beat Psycrow.
Overall, this is a mediocre game that even hardcore Earthworm Jim fans found difficult to enjoy, and consequently the franchise remains all but dead to this day.
Earthworm Jim (1994)
A wacky but classic Sega Genesis adventure
This was one of my favorite Sega Genesis games while growing up.
Within just sixty seconds, I was enticed by the game's weirdness. You play an earthworm in a super suit traversing across a city made up of junk. Hungry crows and vicious, frothy mouthed dogs try to kill you and you launch a cow into the air via catapult. And that's just the very beginning.
You'll fight your way across seven levels and seven bonus stages in a run-and-gun/platform adventure, such as Junkyard City, Heck, an underwater city and a massive laboratory as you guide Jim in his quest to rescue Princess-What's-Her-Face from Queen-Slug-For-A-Butt.
The animation is fluid and cartoonish at the same time with goofy sound effects and the music has a cool sci-fi/techno feel to it.
The game can get frustrating though. The difficulty increases steadily as you progress, and some of the levels, such "For Pete's Sake" and "Buttville", are quite frustrating.
While not as good as Sonic the Hedgehog, Earthworm Jim is a fun classic that still holds up today for retrogamers.
Earthworm Jim 2 (1995)
The best game in the series
This was unquestionably Earthworm Jim's peak.
Princess What's-Her-Name has been kidnapped by Jim's Arch-Enemy, Psychrow, and it's up to our detrivorous, supersuited hero to reach stop the fiend before he forces the princess to marry him at a quick, non-consent marriage center in the Lost Vegas system.
You'll traverse across 10 wild levels, and not just in the typical run and gun/platforming style but there are lots of gimmicky stages as well.
If you thought the previous game was weird, try this one on for size. The wackyness is cranked up to 11. I'm talking about Jim playing in game shows while dressed as a blind salamander, rescuing puppies with a giant marshmallow, using cow milking machines to open gates, and much more.
The enemies and traps are just as goofy, such as falling old women, electric chairs, hopping file cabinets, giant sentient salt shakers. The list goes on.
The controls are smooth and fully responsive, though some hidden items can be tricky to reach at times. Plus, Jim's hover ability has been replaced by a sentient booger named Snot who acts as a parachute or grappling hook to reach certain areas. You can even use a manta ray for a shield to give Jim a few seconds of invincibility.
You'll have access to new weapons, such as the homing missile launcher (which fires actual houses), the barn blaster, a three-finger blaster, and, as a joke, a bubble gun.
The soundtrack, courtesy of Tommy Tallarico, consists of catchy and quirky tunes that fits the series like a glove, from the nifty techno in "Anything But Tangerines" to Beethoven's soothing Moonlight Sonata in "Jim's Now a Blind Cave Salamander".
The graphics and backgrounds are colorful and well-rendered. I liked the blind salamander the most with the light changing and enclosing around Jim and the wavy background.
The sound effects are an amusing mixture of cartoon and sci-fi noises, from the weapons and enemy sound effects to Jim's voice clips.
The difficulty is taken down a notch from the original, though that helped endear the game to more players.
Sonic the Hedgehog (2006)
This ruined the Sonic franchise for me
Like many other Sonic fans, I had high hopes for this game. I'd hoped it be something like "Sonic Adventure 3". Instead, what I experienced was by far the worst Sonic game of all time, thanks in no small part to rushed production and shoddy development.
The story goes something like this: Dr. Eggman seeks to unleash a dark and mysterious power and kidnaps Princess Elise of Soleanna to accomplish his goal. Now, it's up to Sonic and his companions to thwart Eggmans plot before he unleashes an ancient evil entity onto the entire world.
First of all, the story is sloppy and poorly told. There are confusing plot holes everywhere, especially in the time-travel sections concerning Shadow and Silver. And personally, I found the romantic sub-plot between Sonic and Elise to be bizarre and disgusting.
Speaking of which, the new characters are unlikable. Elise is next to useless as she keeps getting kidnapped every five minutes despite Sonics best efforts. Plus, she looks as if she'd be more at home in a Final Fantasy game instead of in a Sonic game. In fact, many of the human characters in the hub world look misplaced. Silver is little more than a dorky plot device who only makes things more difficult for Sonic, and his levels are slow paced and difficult.
The entire experience is severely hampered due to the many bugs and glitches, such as clipping through objects, unresponsive controls, long load times, etc. Further problems such as a cumbersome, inverted camera and frustrating game physics render the gameplay almost totally unpolished and pretty much destroys the fun factor, even with so many playable characters. The bosses were also disappointingly easy to beat, even the final one.
Despite having a remarkable cast, the voice actors sounded bored and barely put any effort into their roles at all, making their interactions dull and awkward. Other times, they were outright annoying, such as Tails screaming and falling to his death in the hub world or Amy pining for Sonic non-stop.
Admittingly, though, there are a few pros to this game. The CG cutscenes, especially in the opening cutscene, have beautiful animation and it still holds up quite well today, although the mediocre in-game animation mitigates it. Mephiles is a genuinely cool and frightening villain who succeeded in killing Sonic, which is more than we can say for Dr. Eggman.
The soundtrack is surprisingly good as well, with pieces such as Wave Ocean, Aquatic Base, White Acropolis, and others being enjoyable. The boss themes, especially the final one, were impressive as well.
Nevertheless, this was undoubtedly the worst Sonic game ever released, and the damage it inflicted on the franchise is still felt today.
Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing (2003)
How did this even make it to the shelves?!
I've played Flash games on Newgrounds released in 2003 that were better than this. This isn't even a game. It's half-finished, glitch infested garbage that people only play out of morbid fascination at how abysmal it is. Say what you will about Bubsy 3D, Superman 64, and even Atari E. T, but at least those titles were finished, albeit badly.
You're given a selection of only four trucks to drive. None of them differ in performance. You'll have a mere five racetracks to choose from, and the fourth one is so flawed the game crashes if you select it.
The graphics and level design are completely dull, grainy, and lifeless looking. There isn't any sound except for the truck's engine. There isn't even any music.
Your vehicle has no limit to its speed. You can actually accelerate indefinitely by driving backwards. Gravity and physics are non-existent, so you can drive straight up 90-degree angle hills and walls. The truck is partially intangible, so you can simply drive through trees and buildings. You can even drive right off the map.
Although this is supposed to be a racing game, the opposing truck doesn't move at all, so there's no actual competition involved. And once you reach the finish line, a text appears reading "You're win" appears. You're win? Seriously?
This felt more like an early tech demo that was very prematurely released. Whoever gave it the green light to be distributed must have been totally drunk when doing so.
Blue Stinger (1999)
A remarkable but forgotten Dreamcast game
Apart from Sonic Adventure, this was the first Dreamcast game I ever played, so it was a fairly special part of my childhood gaming years. Basically, it was a futuristic and more actionized Resident Evil.
In the year 2018 ESER officer Elliot G. Ballad (Brian Drummond) is on a Christmas vacation when a meteor suddenly hits Dinosaur Island and creates a massive energy dome that surrounds it. Elliot makes it ashore to discover the island is overrun by monsters created by the meteor impact. Concurrently, a mysterious alien being named Nephilim appears and accompanies Elliot for unknown reasons (at first). Assisted by a ship captain named Dogs Bower (Dean Bristow- RIP) and security guard, Janine King (Lani Minella), Elliot must uncover the reason for the disaster and prevent it from spreading any further.
The graphics were great, and the levels were large and had full 3D rendering, which was uncommon at the time. They looked good but rough in some areas, and some of the layouts were confusing and easy to get lost in. The character designs are smooth and well designed, but their animations are limited. The enemy designs and sounds were legitimately frightening and fitting for the survival horror setting.
The soundtrack had an urgent and cinematic feel to it that would keep you pumped and ready for action, except for the supermarket section that played jarringly cheery Christmas music that quickly became grating.
Following the same basic formula as Resident Evil, the gameplay was solid and fun: you fight monsters, collect items, and advance further by finding keys or defeating bosses. But rather than the traditional fixed camera angles, there's an uncontrollable third-person styled camera that was frustrating at times, due to it often getting stuck on walls. Nephilim frequently blocking it as she follows you around didn't help matters.
Another element that mitigated the survival horror aspect was the monetary system. Defeating enemies would cause them to drop coins you could use to purchase weapons, ammunition, and health items from vending machines.
You'll have access to an extensive and cool arsenal of melee and ranged weapons. These range from basic, like handguns, crossbows, and baseball bats to advanced, like a railgun, bazooka, ray sword, and even a napalm launcher.
To me, the main drawback of the game was the voice acting. Despite having a respectable cast, the voice actors completely phone in their performances and sound ridiculous half the time. They pause and talk over each other frequently as they engage in cheesy B-movie style dialogue.
In conclusion, Blue Stinger was a pretty solid adventure game for the Dreamcast, and while it didn't reach the level of success as Resident Evil, I still remember it fondly.
Armorines: Project S.W.A.R.M. (1999)
A mediocre mix of Turok and Starship Troopers
Being a big fan of Turok and Starship Troopers, I thought this game would be awesome, so I tried it as a kid. I can't say it was particularly fun or impressive though.
The plot is simple: humankind is at war with an alien race of giant, vicious insects who seek to conquer Earth. A group of power-armored super soldiers called the Armorines is tasked with infiltrating multiple alien nests and killing the queens within in order to stop the bugs from eradicating mankind.
You have the option of choosing between two playable characters: Tony Lewis and Myra Lane. Both characters have different weaponry and equipment built into their armored suits, though Myra was the better choice.
You'll battle your way across twenty different levels that tend to be fairly well designed, but also large, bland, and empty. Poor lighting in many areas makes navigation and combat difficult. Making matters worse, there's no map feature or any checklists for the nests you destroy, requiring a lot of backtracking.
Combat is flawed due to the loose aiming system, but the auto-aim setting can mitigate this. Your armory is limited to only five other weapons besides your standard one, but given the fact your basic weapon has unlimited ammo, you'll probably spend limited time using them anyway.
There's only a small variety of alien enemies you'll encounter, and their AI isn't very good, but their designs are legitimately creepy and well animated. There's a certain horror aspect coming from the bugs as they crawl across walls and ceilings or fly toward you in swarms, especially in darker areas.
The sound effects are pretty cool, from the futuristic pulse of your weapons to the ferocious screeches and roars of the bugs. You'll also hear horrified screams from human victims being carried off to their doom if you don't rescue them. The graphics and animations are good as well, both from the player character and the enemies.
However, the music tends to be suppressed and boring, doing little to contribute to the experience.
Finally, the enjoyable multiplayer mode made the game worth at least a rent.
But overall, this was a solidly average FPS that was easily overshadowed by the vastly superior Turok series, but still worth playing if you were bored.
Superman (1999)
This game was Kryptonite for both gamers and Superman.
As a kid, I loved "Superman the Animated Series", which this game was based off of. Needless to say, this was a huge disappointment for me. In fact, if I had to name the worst game I ever played, it's this one. It's a broken, half-finished mess that should never have been made.
Lex Luthor has kidnapped Lois Lane, Jimmy Olsen, and Professor Hamilton and trapped them in a virtual version of Metropolis. Now Superman must enter this virtual reality to save his friends.
Right off the bat, the game throws you into a timed-ring course with no tutorial on how to control Superman at all. You don't even begin with all of his abilities, only flight and super strength. You'll spend half the game in these ring courses, which are infuriatingly difficult given the awkward and unresponsive controls. The pathetic draw distance due to "Kryptonite fog" limiting your vision only makes this harder. You'll even find this fog within the interior sections of the game!
The graphics were atrocious for the time. The character models are blocky and rough. The virtual Metropolis buildings look bland and untextured, and the lifeless streets below are entirely flat and look like children's playmats. The interior sections are no better with basic designs and textures only marginally better than outside. The sound effects, such as enemy attacks, explosions, and whooshing sounds during flight are repetitive and annoying.
There's bugs and glitches everywhere. You'll find yourself flying through walls, getting stuck in between buildings, falling through the floor, and while trying to solve one particular puzzle, suddenly drop dead for no reason. It's ridiculous.
Outside the infamous ring courses are other tasks that are boring or totally frustrating. During combat, Superman does little besides swinging wildly at random mooks. The bosses are laughably easy, as they possess crappy AI and do little to actually fight you. Even Darkseid (who is inexplicably working for Luthor) is a pushover.
Needless to say, this game was an absolute disgrace to the Man of Steel that deserves its reputation as one of the worst games ever made and definitely the worst game ever released for the N64.
Bubsy 3D (1996)
EVERYTHING could go wrong, Bubsy! And it DID!
This is definitely one of the worst video games I have ever played. Even though I only rented it from Blockbuster way back in the day as a kid, I still can't emphasize how much I wanted to return it and get my money back after playing it for only twenty minutes.
The plot is pretty simple. Bubsy Bobcat is abducted by the Woolies in their attempt to invade Earth and steal all of its yarn. However, Bubsy manages to escape and must fight his way across 18 different, Woolie infested stages, and find a way back to Earth by collecting atoms and space rocket parts.
Basically, this game failed miserably in every way Super Mario 64 and Crash Bandicoot succeeded when all three came out in 1996.
First of all, Bubsy is completely insufferable. His character model is ugly, and his big, toothy grin is borderline creepy. His voice is the most annoying I've ever heard in a video game. Seriously, every time he spoke, it felt like someone was puncturing my eardrums with needles! His constant spouting of lame jokes and cat puns only made me despise him even more.
The graphics were terrible, even for its time. The animation was low-framed and jerky. And the level designs and landscape were largely bland and untextured, making them look completely dull. In fact, it felt like the game was only half-way finished and a very clunky prototype was rushed onto the shelves.
The tank controls made Bubsy's movements stiff and awkward, especially when jumping from one platform to another. Combined with the confusing camera angles, this made navigating through the poorly designed levels a nightmare.
The music is repetitive and almost as annoying as Bubsy himself. It gets even worse whenever an enemy is nearby, which will probably make up half the time you waste playing this heap of garbage.
Whether it's on an ancient but functional PS1 or an emulator, do NOT play Bubsy 3D if you value your time and sanity.
Sir Billi (2012)
Sean Connery came out of retirement for this?!
This is undoubtedly one of the worst animated movies I've ever seen. Plus, as a big fan of both James Bond and Sir Sean Connery (RIP), it was very disappointing to know that this was his final film before he passed away. Plus, with the unacceptable amount of sex appeal and profanity, this was definitely not a kid's movie.
The film takes place in Scotland where humans and andromorphic animals co-exist. For some inexplicable reason, Beavers are illegal. Sir William "Billi" Sedgewick (Sean Connery) is a veterinarian who lives om the town of Catterness, Scotland with a goat named Gordon (Alan Cumming). After a truck full of Beavers being forcibly relocated to Norway crashes, releasing the animals, an animal hating cop named McKenzie (Ford Kiernan) begins to hunt them down. Now Billi and his friends must band together to save the day. That's about all I bothered to gather from what I could bear to watch.
Seriously, the story is so incoherent and difficult to follow, you'll probably get a headache trying to figure it out. It feels like it's just a compilation of Connery's previous films mixed with barely any original material into one gigantic mess. The introduction alone is obviously based off of the opening credits of "The Spy Who Loved Me" for you James Bond fans out there.
The animation and scenery are terrible, only slightly better than "FoodFight" released the same year. The character models, both human and animal, are off-putting and poorly designed. All of the female characters have exaggerated curves that clash with their ugly faces. The animal characters are so sloppily made, they're hard to identify as either rabbits or beavers.
The voice acting and dialogue is as bad as the animation. Connery himself, who was in his 80s during production, sounds exhausted and pitiful, muttering his lines as if from his own bedroom in his pajamas right after waking up. Sometimes, it's hard to even understand what he's saying. Everyone else sounded no better and the child actors were outright annoying with their constant ear-piercing screams.
Overall, this was a horrible sendoff for Sean Connery, who should have retired for good after "League of Extraordinary Gentlemen" which was a mediocre film unto itself, but still much better than this hot mess and at least it turned a profit. Instead, his career ended on a very bitter note that he didn't deserve.
Catwoman (2004)
"Catastrophe" is more like it
I never actually watched this in theaters (thankfully). But I've heard so much bad stuff about this film, read many negative reviews about it, and heard how much Halle Berry regrets it, that I just had to see it for myself to see if it's truly that bad. And it was undoubtedly the worst superhero movie I've ever seen so far, surpassed only by "Steel".
Halle Berry plays a timid graphic designer named Patience Phillips who works for a cosmetics company, Hedare Beauty. Upon discovering a dangerous product being marketed by the evil and greedy George Hedare (Lambert Wilson) and his wife Laurel Hedare (Sharon Stone), Patience is murdered to cover it up, only to be revived by an Egyptian Mau cat, which grants her supernatural powers and thus she takes up the crime-fighting alter ego, Catwoman.
First of all, the film is shamelessly unfaithful to the source material. Except for the film's title, there are no ties between this film and the DC universe. Catwoman's alter ego isn't named Selina Kyle. There are no other DC characters involved or mentioned. The story doesn't even take place in Gotham City. In fact, the city isn't identified at all.
Besides being nothing like Selina Kyle, Patience's new and completely unnecessary feline traits render her character laughable, such as sleeping on shelves, hissing at dogs, gobbling down sushi and tuna, etc. She's not even a true cat burglar, she's only stealing jewelry because cats like shiny objects. Not to mention an incredibly lame pun she utters while thwarting a robbery: "What a purrrrrfect plan". Ugh...
The rest of the cast is no better. Detective Tom Lone (Benjamin Bratt) is a clueless moron who is oblivious to the fact that Patience and Catwoman are the same person. Wilson is a stereotypically pompous British jerk, and Stone is barely even trying to fulfill her role.
The story is boring and out of place. An evil cosmetics company pumping out anti-aging cream with dangerous side effects feels like a jarring plot for a superhero movie.
The effects are truly terrible, especially the overused and unconvincing CGI. The Egyptian cat that bestows Catwomans powers onto her looks cartoonish, as do the seagulls seen afterwards. Catwoman's CGI model looked as if it came from a poorly textured video game, and the directors' obvious attempts to cover it up by smothering Berry with make-up only made it more ridiculous.
The practical effects are no better. During the final battle when Laurel falls to her death, it's obviously a dummy. Poor editing and quick cuts only worsen the experience, especially during the aforementioned battle. Theres also the films failed attempt at slow-motion effects that only leave sloppy motion blurs, such as during Catwomans motorcycle scene.
There's only one truly cool moment in the movie where Patience teachers her obnoxious, party-animal neighbors a lesson. Plus, the films' main theme, "Who's in Control" by Natasha Shneider, is much more enjoyable than the film itself. Those are the only real highlights.
I doubt even the most hardcore Catwoman fans will find any enjoyment in watching this.
Finding Jesus (2020)
This literally made my mind feel numb
While doing some research on bad animated movies, I happened to spot this near the bottom of the list. After seeing how abysmal it's IMDB rating was, I let my curiosity get the best of me and I watched it for free on YouTube Movies to see just how bad it was. That was a mistake...
The very first painful minute alone made my jaw drop at how horrible this movie was. We see a couple of dead-eyed fish, Joy and Muggles, swimming in sluggish animation with a bland background and perpetual smiles that look borderline creepy. They engage in hollow sounding chatter with their annoying voices, Muggles makes a lame fin pun, and gives off a VERY annoying laugh that made me cringe. The scene is ended by a bubble scene change that feels like it was ripped off from SpongeBob SquarePants.
After another forty-five minutes through, I simply couldn't bear to watch anymore of this garbage as my brain started feeling numb. But I saw enough to realize this was a painfully boring expeirence.
EVERYTHING about this movie wasterrible. The animation is completely bland and repetitive, the characters and their voices are annoying, and they sound unmotivated, and the plot is basically the two protagonists learning a bunch of bible lessons and they didn't even find Jesus at all despite the film's title. There was even a sushi roll character that was shamelessly racist towards the Japanese.
This is nothing but a "Finding Nemo" rip-off mixed with Christian themes that even the stoutest Christian children won't enjoy watching. Its rating is completely deserved, and I felt truly angry that I wasted forty-five minutes of my life that I could have spent watching grass grow instead. And now, I'm warning you, do NOT expose your kids to this, not matter how Christian you are.
Tarzan and the Lost City (1998)
Not the worst Tarzan flick, but it's close
As a lifelong Tarzan fan, of both the books and the movies, I gotta say watching this as a kid on VHS was disappointing. I only watched it again many years later because I just happened to stumble onto it while curiously skimming over Casper Van Dien's filmography and decided to make this review.
In 1913, John Clayton aka Tarzan (Casper Van Dien) is preparing to marry Jane Porter (Jane March) in England. But suddenly, he receives a vision sent by a shaman named Mugambe (Winston Ntshona), informing him that explorer and treasure hunter Nigel Ravens (Stephen Waddington) is plundering African villages in search of the lost city of Opar. Now, Tarzan must return to Africa to stop Ravens while Jane follows him to assist on his adventure.
The plot is pretty straightforward but shows little faithfulness to the source literary material. For example, the origin of Tarzans name came from his tribe of apes, not the natives. Jane is American, not British. And Opar is portrayed almost completely differently as a gigantic pyramid instead of a city. Furthermore, Queen La and the Oparoids are completely absent. Finally, with the uncharacteristic supernatural elements it felt like it was trying to emulate an Indiana Jones type atmosphere, but it falls completely short.
First of all, the cast don't fit their roles. With his build, Casper Van Dien made an acceptable Tarzan, but he lacked the height and the rugged face of Johnny Weissmuller and Christopher Lambert from past incarnations, and his awful fake British accent didn't help. Jane March is a run-of-the-mill damsel in distress who mostly just complicates things for Tarzan. Steven Waddington is basically a Rene Belloq wannabe who isn't tough or intimidating enough to impress the audience, let alone challenge the King of the Apes.
The special effects were poor for the most part. Tarzan's ape friends were men wearing ridiculously fake looking suits and Mugumbe's CGI Cobra form is very cheesy, even by 90s standards. Speaking of which, what did Mugumbe even need Tarzan to fight the bad guys for if he could turn into a snake? And even bees?! It doesn't make any sense.
The action scenes are sloppy and muddled up by excessive slow motion, choppy editing, and close ups that make them hard to enjoy.
There were some redeeming qualities though. I did appreciate the beautiful landscape of South Africa where filming took place, from the lush jungles to the savannah fields. And the massive pyramid of Opar itself, which was made with practical effects, is impressive. There was also some pretty nice footage of real animals to counter the fake gorillas, including a Chimp named Jebba.
In the end, this was an ambitious but failed attempt to create a modern Tarzan in the 90's that damaged Casper Van Dien's reputation in Hollywood. Don't watch this unless you're either bored or a massive Tarzan fan.
BloodRayne (2005)
A bad adaptation to a good video game
As someone who played and enjoyed Bloodrayne in the past, this was an aggravating disappointment and only proved that Uwe Boll is a lousy director with a special "gift" for creating deeply flawed video game adaptations.
The film takes place in the eighteenth century. A dhampir named Rayne (Kristanna Loken) is a kept as a circus freak before escaping to avenge her human mother who was raped by a Vampire named Kagan (Ben Kingsley). Along the way, she meets a trio of vampire hunters, (Michael Madsen, Michelle Rodriguez, Matt Davis) whom she convinces to help her take Kagan down.
First of all, the story is almost completely different from the game. Instead of the 1930s, this story is in the 1700s, but it strangely looks like the middle ages. The plot is as clear as mud and progresses at a slow and weary pace that'll leave you confused as to what's happening. The script and dialogue were pathetically awkward and didn't convey the characters emotions properly.
The action scenes are too fast paced and blurry to appreciate or are simply badly edited and unconvincing. Plus, the special effects, both practical and CGI, are painfully bad.
Worse still was the aesthetic which didn't match the game at all. The costumes aren't very impressive and even Rayne's outfit seemed mediocre. The weapons look almost as ridiculously fake as the wigs worn by several characters.
The acting was the worst part of all, despite consisting of a good ensemble, somehow including Ben Kingsley. The cast completely phone in their performances. Loken is the only one who makes any kind of half-decent effort, but her acting still lacks the witty and sarcastic spirit that Raynes voice actress, Laura Bailley, delivered in the games. Bailey herself even said she hated this film.
The rest of the actors were largely apathetic and lazy in their roles. Ben Kingsley has a blank or troubled expression as he spends most of his screentime sitting on a throne, probably thinking "What the hell am I doing here?". Michael Madsen is clearly drunk in all of his scenes. Michelle Rodriguez's fake British accent is horrible. Billy Zane's dubbing is as unconvincing as the wig he wears. It's like they didn't care at all and just wanted to get paid and go home.
Sadly, this is only the first of three horrible Bloodryane flicks directed by Uwe Boll in his six-year campaign to eviscerate the franchise, which undoubtedly pissed off a few fans of the games.
Mac and Me (1988)
A cheesy ET ripoff mixed with a promotion for McDonalds
This is nothing but a shameless and unsuccessful attempt to cash in on ET's past success along with advertising McDonalds.
A family of aliens living on a barren desert planet stowaway on a human satellite and wind up on Earth, particularly California. Upon arriving on Earth, they escape from a NASA sight with ridiculous ease. While the parents and younger sibling flee into the desert, Mac, the older sibling, hitches a ride aboard a station wagon driven by a family moving in from Chicago. Soon, Mac befriends a wheelchair bound boy named Eric, who helps the former find his family and eventually integrate into human society.
The acting is completely dull. All the human characters sound bored and their performances are unconvincing. The aliens are borderline criminal, as the father steals a security guards' gun and waves it around dangerously inside a grocery store late in the film. Plus, unlike ET, they're also complete idiots who make no attempt to conceal themselves from the humans despite being on the run from the government.
Mac himself isn't very sympathetic, being a mischievous troublemaker. Early into the film, he gets Eric into trouble and even nearly gets him killed by mistake.
The alien designs and animatronics here are as unimpressive as they are repulsive, also unlike ET, who is cute and ugly mixed together and was played convincingly. Mac and his relatives have gaunt builds, bulging eyes, and their faces are stuck in a constant shocked state with o-shaped mouths. Mac himself sometimes cuts between a kid in a suit and a very unconvincing animatronic. Combine this with their ungainly movements, they're outright disturbing to look at.
The rest of the effects are equally cheesy, such as the space shuttle landing and the stop motion effects in the very first scene which set the stage for the rest of the flick.
The only real bright side is that the soundtrack was composed by Alan Silveresti, who was far too good to be involved in a third-rate film like this. The pop songs "You're Not a Stranger Anymore" and "Take Me I'll Follow You" are especially notable but even that isn't enough to save this movie.