The West Wing (TV Series)
Post Hoc, Ergo Propter Hoc (1999)
Ruben Santiago-Hudson: Morris Tolliver
Quotes
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President Josiah Bartlet : What is that?
Morris Tolliver : It's a flu shot.
President Josiah Bartlet : I don't need a flu shot.
Morris Tolliver : You do need a flu shot.
President Josiah Bartlet : How do I know this isn't the start of a military coup?
Morris Tolliver : Sir...
President Josiah Bartlet : I want the Secret Service in here right away.
Morris Tolliver : In the event of a military coup, sir, what makes you think the Secret Service is going to be on your side?
President Josiah Bartlet : [pause] Now that's a thought that's going to fester.
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President Josiah Bartlet : It's not like I'm totally without experience, you know.
Morris Tolliver : Yes, sir.
President Josiah Bartlet : You're talking to a former governor. I was commander-in-chief of the New Hampshire National Guard.
Morris Tolliver : You guys get into a lot of tough scrapes, did ya?
President Josiah Bartlet : We didn't have to. We'd just stand on the border and stare you down. Then we'd all go for pancakes.
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President Josiah Bartlet : Jokes like that are part of my folksy charm, Morris. It's at the very heart of my popularity.
Morris Tolliver : Don't you have a job approval rating of like 3% or something?
President Josiah Bartlet : Well, we're having some difficulty getting the word out.
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[a Navy doctor is checking the president's pulse]
President Josiah Bartlet : So, how's my pulse?
Morris Tolliver : Have you been running up and down the stairs at the Rose Bowl in the past few minutes?
President Josiah Bartlet : No.
Morris Tolliver : Then it's not that good.
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President Josiah Bartlet : Your wife's beautiful, too. How'd you get her to marry you? Did you trick her or something?
Morris Tolliver : Hypnosis.
President Josiah Bartlet : Yeah, I figured.
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President Josiah Bartlet : [referring to the newborn child of Navy Physician Tolliver, who's examining him] So how's the kid?
Morris Tolliver : Ten days old today.
President Josiah Bartlet : Can she spell anything yet?
Morris Tolliver : No, sir.
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President Josiah Bartlet : [looking at a picture of Doctor Tolliver's wife and newborn daughter, after asking whether the doctor has a picture of the baby] Oh, she's beautiful! What's her name?
Morris Tolliver : Angela's my wife. Corey is our daughter. It was my grandmother's name. She got it from her great aunt, who got it from the first free woman she ever met.
President Josiah Bartlet : Hmm, that name's got a hell of a past.
Morris Tolliver : My family's very proud of our past, as you can tell.
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President Josiah Bartlet : [the President is talking as Navy Physician Tolliver takes his blood pressure; he's inquiring about the doctor's plans for an imminent trip to the Middle East] What's in Jordan?
Morris Tolliver : Amman.
President Josiah Bartlet : You should stay here. We got Amman, a woman, little kids... the works.
Morris Tolliver : 131 over 84
[proceeding with the check-up as if the President hadn't said anything]
Morris Tolliver : .
President Josiah Bartlet : See, that was a joke.
Morris Tolliver : Good one
[in a deadpan, monotone delivery]
Morris Tolliver : .
President Josiah Bartlet : Everybody's a critic today.