Home Improvement (TV Series)

Chop Shop 'til You Drop (1999)

Tim Allen: Tim Taylor

Photos 

Quotes 

• Brad : [Brad's car has been stolen and stripped]  I can't believe this. There's nothing they can do?

  Tim : I'm with Brad. Somebody has got to be held accountable for this.

  Jill : You heard the officer. There's nothing they can do.

  Tim : Maybe there's nothing THEY can do. But there's something *I* can do. I'm the guy who delivered a baby after being crowned Car Guy of the Year in the same night. I'm the guy that built a lawn mower than can do 12 seconds in a 1/4 mile. I'm the guy that put a barbecue grill in geosynchronous orbit, so don't you tell me there's nothing we can do. I'm the Tool Man, I can fix ANYTHING.

  Jill : Alright, zip up your fly and let's go.

• Tim : [on the phone with the police]  My son's car was stolen and I'm offering free Tool Time tickets to the man that finds it... Officer? I fail to see the humor in what I just said.

• Tim : Compression test is a great way to find out if your rings are in good shape or you got a crack in the block.

  Al Borland : My gauge should read between 120 and 130 pounds.

  Tim : The last time your gauge read that, you were 6 years old.

• Tim : $3000 and that's my final offer.

  Thelma McCready : And here's my final offer: Bite me!