The Truth About Cats & Dogs (1996)
Uma Thurman: Noelle
Photos
Quotes
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Dr. Abby Barnes : If I was a guy, I think women would, like, line up to go out with me. I'm smart. I have a good sense of humor. I make a great living.
Noelle : I'd fuck you.
Dr. Abby Barnes : Thank you, honey. I know you would.
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Noelle : You and I combined make the perfect woman
Dr. Abby Barnes : No. You and I combined make the perfect political prisoner. What we really do well is act self-righteous and starve.
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Noelle : What's wrong, Abby?
Dr. Abby Barnes : Nothing that a rooftop and an AK-47 won't take care of.
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Noelle : Disappointment doesn't kill.
Dr. Abby Barnes : Right... rejection kills. Disappointment only maims.
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Noelle : Did you ever look in the mirror so long that your face didn't make sense anymore? It just becomes all these shapes. Just shapes. Not good or bad.
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Noelle : What is this? Is this cat hair?
Dr. Abby Barnes : I'm shedding. I'm extremely nervous.
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Noelle : Her cheese balls make excellent Christmas gifts!
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Noelle : You mean you want me to shove my finger up that turtle's ass?
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Noelle : Maybe it was all the cake he fed me.
Dr. Abby Barnes : What is that, the twinkie defense?
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[contemplating how to reveal Abby's true identity to Brian]
Noelle : Is your show on today?
Dr. Abby Barnes : Yeah.
Noelle : I'll go to his house and I'll turn on the radio.
Dr. Abby Barnes : And?
Noelle : Have you ever noticed how Superman and Clark Kent are never in the same room at the same time?
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Noelle : You gotta have a boyfriend, don't you? Otherwise it's just you and a cat and before you know, 40 candles on your birthday cake.
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Noelle : I don't eat anything so I can look good on the outside, but on the inside, there's nothing.