Grown Ups (I) (2010)
Kevin James: Eric Lamonsoff
Photos
Quotes
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[from trailer]
Bean Lamonsoff : Mommy, I want some milk.
Sally Lamonsoff : Come here. I'll give you a little something.
[starts breastfeeding Bean]
Roxanne Chase-Feder : Your son is so cute. How old is he?
Eric Lamonsoff : 48 months.
Kurt McKenzie : [pause] That's 4.
Eric Lamonsoff : [pause] Yeah.
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Lenny Feder : You see that? You just aim for a spot and shoot the ball there?
Eric Lamonsoff : It's true. Your dad has won over 50 games with that shot.
Greg Feder : Really? Because that shot doesn't work on the Wii.
Eric Lamonsoff : Well, you should Wii-turn that Wii and get yourself a Wii-fund. Tim Duncan has had over a hundred game winners with that shot.
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Bean Lamonsoff : I want mommy's milk!
Eric Lamonsoff : No more mommy's milk.
Bean Lamonsoff : I want mommy's milk.
[a kid walks by with a milk carton, which Eric takes]
Milk Kid : Hey!
Eric Lamonsoff : Here's a dollar, get out of here. Now drink it.
Bean Lamonsoff : I don't know if mommy will like that.
Eric Lamonsoff : Just watch me drink it.
[Bean drinks the milk carton]
Bean Lamonsoff : I'm just like daddy.
Kurt McKenzie : Yay! More for us!
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Lenny Feder : Lamonsoff, it's 5 in the morning. Can you kill the dog now?
Eric Lamonsoff : Thinking about it.
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Kurt McKenzie : [while seeing Rob talk to his daughter] How do you get that from that?
Eric Lamonsoff : 95% of that has to be from the mother, and I am lowballing.
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Eric Lamonsoff : I gotta make a sissy.
Kurt McKenzie : Come on, you made three already.
Rob Hilliard : It must be oozing out at this point.
Eric Lamonsoff : Shut up. I'm trying to concentrate.
Kurt McKenzie : It's taking a piss, not the SATs.
Lenny Feder : Are you peeing or is a diesel truck turning off? What the hell is that?
Marcus Higgins : Listen to hamper bottom. I think he's sending a message in Morse code. Getting old. Stop. Can't pee. Stop. Reek like an asparagus. Stop. Even though I didn't have any. Stop.
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Sally Lamonsoff : See that? Now he won't even drink from me.
Roxanne Chase-Feder : That's what men do. They take and take, and then give you up for some cow.
Sally Lamonsoff : Well now I don't know what I'm going to do with these.
Eric Lamonsoff : I do.
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Donna Lamonsoff : Dad, hurry up. I want to go on the other rides.
Eric Lamonsoff : Just a minute. Don't worry, we'll get to ride all of them.
Donna Lamonsoff : Are you making a sissy? You know they make a chemical that turns urine blue.
Eric Lamonsoff : No, that's just a myth.
Donna Lamonsoff : [as the urine is turning blue] Oh, my God! You're embarrassing me!