- Mike Morgan: I gotta admit, it's awesome to see a strange girl's breasts.
- Bump: I'd crawl a mile on broken glass to suck the dick that fucked her last.
- Scottie Smith: Shakespeare couldn't've said it better.
- Bump: What happened with your chick?
- Mike Morgan: I don't know, uh, she and her friends took off.
- Bump: What? Oh, you blew it! You do realize that entire conversation was an *I wanna potentially sit on your face* interview, right?
- Bump: Mike, sometimes the best part of the party isn't the party, you know what I mean?
- Mike Morgan: I know exactly what you mean.
- Crowd: [chanting] Max isn't gay! Max isn't gay!