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Les Misérables (2012)
I'd Rather Watch Miley Stick Out Her Coated Tongue
Please pardon me while I send a couple tweets:
@AmandaSeyfried: Please stop singing. Play to your strengths - you are pretty and you can act. Just please, no more singing! #torture
@Eddie_Redmayne: Please consider following the advice I gave @AmandaSeyfried. #pleasestop
Okay, I'm back.
Honestly, their voices have been rattling my eardrums for weeks. Sweet Amanda (whom I truly hate being negative about-she's just so darn adorable), has this strange high-pitched falsetto-thing going on that is absolutely jarring. And I am completely baffled by Eddie Redmayne being cast as Marius. He is surrounded by several handsome, pleasant-voiced guys who could have easily trumped him in this role. But no, we're stuck with his odd tenor, which dangles on the cusp of a holler.
As for the rest of the movie... Sigh. Following all the amazing reviews, the Oscar nods, and an entire history of award-winning stage productions, I was so excited to see this movie. But I ended up so disappointed by, quite literally, every single aspect.
First, the storyline is terrible; it made absolutely no sense. Based on this, I doubt I would even like the stage production. Why on earth was Jean Valjean thrown in jail for 19 years for stealing a loaf of bread? More importantly, why on earth did Javert leap to his death after realizing Valjean was probably not such a bad guy, after all? Seriously, that realization was worth an impulsive, gruesome, painful, neck-snapping death? If I realized someone turned out to be a good guy, after all, I would probably be relieved and buy him a "Sorry for making your life a living hell, you can come out of hiding now" Beer. Right?
Also, yes, Anne Hathaway, completely committed to her character and to that one amazing song. Lovely! But they completely flew through her story. Since I hadn't seen the musical before, I had no idea that she died, and so close to the beginning! Devastating. Mainly because her story was the only interesting story of the lot. And then she died and I was stuck watching the mess that remained. Argh.
And seriously, the story sank from there.
I kept hearing that, in the stage productions anyway, Eponine's song was the official show-stopper, the song that left everyone breathless. But here, it felt flat and boring. It wasn't the actress's fault, her voice was lovely. It was the song's fault, or maybe lack of character development, I'm not sure. I only know that it wasn't very impressive.
And finally, I like a little redemption, or a little something rewarding with my nosedive into death and destruction. But there was none of that. Just the entire cast (everyone dies, except two), meeting on a garbage heap to sing the closing number.
Bad story. Bad writing. Bad singing. Bad movie.
This movie is meant for the Les Miserables fanatics who are committed to loving everything about this story, and who will never EVER find any fault. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. :-)
The Great Gatsby (2013)
Fabulous Novel Adaptation
Unfortunately, I last read the novel in high school. I meant to read it again before watching this movie, and I hate admitting that I did not. I do remember many scenes from the book, however, and I remember the story making me feel uncomfortable, or sad, or a bit odd in some way. But I do not remember the novel bursting into a glorious rainbow of colors the way this movie did (which I enjoyed). Most importantly, I did not remember what made this novel one of the most resonating tragic works of our time.
Personally, I believe this story is told extremely well and the actors are superb. When Gatsby and Daisy reconnect for the first time in five years and they look at each other... be ready, their longing will move you. Then, in the end, when you realize Gatsby's whole world was built around, and revolved around, Daisy, is absolutely inspiring. Especially when you learn he was no more than an escape to her. All his dreaming and planning, and yes, evening his hoping, was for naught. Crushing, really. But at least he died thinking she loved him too.
This adaptation is breathtaking, yet heartbreaking; and one of the best adaptations I've seen in a long while.
Love It or List It (2008)
Idea Is Okay, Despite Biased Formula
As a Realtor and design enthusiast, I thought I'd enjoy seeing these two sides compete. But I find myself seriously stressed by every single aspect of this show, and I think the formula is to blame:
1) The homeowners must watch way too much HGTV because they have THE MOST unreal expectations on what Hilary the Designer can do for them. For example, homeowners always give Hilary a $20,000-$50,000 budget (up to a very rare $70,000 budget) to basically rebuild their 90-year-old, 1500 sqft, 3 bedroom home, and turn it into a sparkly new 4,000 sqft, 5 bedroom home with all the bells and whistles, that also includes a finished basement underneath the home where there is currently a concrete slab on top of a pile of dirt. And in EVERY show, at least one wall must come down.
HOWEVER, we usually find in 90-year-old homes, and in almost every episode, that behind-the-wall issues basically drain Hilary of her entire teensy-weensy budget, leaving the homeowners emotionally drained and unfairly frustrated with her. Most viewers may blame the homeowners for being so unreasonable. Well, so do I.
Meanwhile, David the Realtor is given an $850,000 budget to find their move-in ready dream home in the same neighborhood.
2) Once David the Realtor has shown them their dream home in their same neighborhood, it's consistently, approximately $100,000 over their original budget.
3) Fortunately for both David and the homeowners, Hilary the Designer has scraped every cent together to somehow get at least a little something exquisitely done in their home (the gal is talented!), which then boosts their profit a consistent, surprising, $100,000, which David then points out will allow them to buy the $950,000 home he last showed them, right before they make their "tough" decision.
Basically, using Hilary's hard work against her.
4) Meanwhile, Hilary has had to continually educate the homeowners regarding the shabby state of their home's construction, then get blamed and verbally abused by the homeowners, and then allow David to take the final word to win his argument.
Perhaps I am wrong, but I sense something is amiss with this formula, leaving me with a single question...
Did David create this show? :-)
Happy Watching!
Devious Maids (2013)
Wonderfully entertaining, deliciously sinful
I have had the most fun watching this show. When the promos first aired, I was skeptical. I assumed the show would use the "Desperate Housewives" formula, but I didn't have much hope in the writing or story arc. I really can't explain why I thought this, but I couldn't have been more wrong. From the first episode, I have been absolutely hooked. Yes, because the show is intriguing; but also because I really like these ladies. ALL of them, even the villainous employers like Evelyn Powell. (LOVED HER IMMEDIATELY IN EPISODE ONE). The writing is clever and witty, and the characters are lovable. (Rosie is especially charming).
I do not typically watch shows like this. I'm more of a Dexter/True Blood/Big Bang Theory/Downton Abbey kind of girl, but it's fun to have this guilty pleasure in your back pocket when you want to escape into the mindless (and I mean that in a good way) world of television.
PS: Susan Lucci is BRILLIANT as Genevieve.
Happy Watching!
The Heat (2013)
Only Watch If You Want To LAUGH and LAUGH!!
The trailers for this movie did not effectively prepare me for the hilarity to come. The trailers were so ho-hum, in fact, Hubby and I decided we would avoid the movie altogether. Thank goodness our friends stepped in. They asked us to join them, we dragged our feet but said yes, then... TOTAL HILARITY!!
I laughed and laughed, wiped tears from my eyes, and at some point, found myself on the edge of the seat, anxious for more. So freaking good. I have to raise Melissa McCarthy's hand for winning the hilarity competition, but Sandra Bullock was close behind.
What a relief. I feared these two talented superstars were being thrown into a movie for cheap laughs and easy money. Nope. This movie has earned a top spot in the Hall of Hilarity (a little something I created just now). Well written, fun, FUNNY, and the good news is... IMDb shows a sequel in the future. YAY!!
Happy Watching!
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters (2013)
I Wanted This Movie To Be Good, But...
It was a Friday night and rain drenched the entire city, making it a perfect night to snuggle on the couch with wine and popcorn and watch a creepy, fun, witch-hunting kind of movie. If only...
Despite a solid cast, the special effects were atrocious. (Hint: You're not supposed to tell they're acting in front of a green screen anymore, are you?) When watching an 80's movie, sure, there is some room for forgiveness; but in 2013, there is simply no excuse. And the giant troll-type thing named Edward, though lovable, looked like he just jumped out of The Labrynth or The Dark Crystal (note: another 80's reference). And I swear there was some strange sexual tension between the brother-sister team of Hansel & Gretel. Not sure if dialogue was to blame, or if Renner and his co-star actually had sexual tension, but either way, it was creepy.
On a positive note, Hubby enjoyed this flick a little more than I did. Despite saying, "Yeah, this is pretty bad," he never turned it off, so that must count for something.
Happy Watching!
World War Z (2013)
Gave Me Nightmares So It Must Be Good.
Not a Brad Pitt fan. Not a zombie fan. LOVED this movie!! I only went because my husband wanted to see it. Glad I did. I thought it was a smart premise with a clever conclusion. Granted, I do not put much time into the zombie world, so zombie nerds may not agree. So consider this review on behalf of the average gal interested in a movie lacking gore, but with a handful of good jolts. Fun special effects, especially the zombie climb up the Jerusalem wall. My husband and I both woke up from zombie nightmares later that night. :-) As for the Brad Pitt angle, he managed the role just fine. I am still not his fan, but you might be, so you will enjoy the movie that much more. Happy Watching!