sean7 Reviews

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo (2005)

Remove that stick - it's funny!!!!

[10/10 · 11 September 2005]

The original movie was a very light and inoffensive comedy that pulled a lot of punches so not to make people too uncomfortable. The sequel is quite the opposite and it's hilarious. It seems like schnieder took the shackles off and decided to just go for it. The whole movie is just so completely ludicrous that it's impossible not to laugh. A lot of people here seem to be overly sensitive or overly serious (like so much of society these days).

This movie is one of the funniest I've seen. I don't think I stopped laughing for more than a minute at a time. The first movie was funny in parts, but didn't really have the courage to be what it really wanted to be. The sequel is a different movie. It's more stupid, the language is harsher and the humour is more insensitive. For me, there is nothing funnier than mean spirited insensitive humour. Though I wouldn't really call this move mean spirited, insensitive it certainly is and I applaud it.

So now you know what you're in for and you can make up your own mind. I have to wonder why some people watch this type of film when they are obviously so easily offended. Just to turn their noses up at it in some vain attempt to prove how above it they are I expect.

In America (2002)

Cliched in the extreme

[28 January 2004]

I haven't really got too much too say, but after reading such positive comments about this film, such as how realistic it was, I just had to comment.

Far from realistic, IN AMERICA contains more cliches than your average Hollywood blockbuster. It's quite embarrassing at times, but this is undoubtably the type of film that people will want to talk up as it's low budget and contains a poor family trying to make it.

It was my girlfriends choice as she thought it'd be a tear jerker, but she hated it, thought the acting was poor and that the story was completely cliched. She doesn't mind a cliched tear jerker, let me tell you, but this was too much, even for her.

The Others (2001)

Good, but not great.

[3 December 2001]

The best thing about this movie is that it looks really good. A brilliant gothic atmosphere envelops the entire production and the acting is first rate, but it doesn't quite all come together, I can't say exactly what it is missing, but it just adds up to less than the sum of it's parts.



***What follows are not exactly SPOILERS, but what I have to say will probably help you work out the ending even easier than you would have.***

Think of the ending to the overrated THE SIXTH SENSE, remember that? good, now think, maybe even more so, of the ending to the underrated HAUNTED(the one with Aidan Quinn and Kate Beckinsale), there's your ending, maybe you won't guess every tiny detail, but you will have pretty much worked it out early on. Making it even worse is the fact that the movie seems to be trying it's hardest to give away the ending at every opportunity, the children are firing off clues every five minutes and the house keepers don't exactly make it any harder either.

When are writers going to realize that you don't have to have a surprise ending every time(unless you have come up with something truly new), it's no longer a surprise if every movie has one, and when you know that there is a surprise ending before you see the film you invariably end up spending the running time of the film just trying to work out what the ending will be.

THE OTHERS is still a good movie, certainly better than THE SIXTH SENSE, but there are better films in the haunted house/supernatural genre, such as THE CHANGELING, HAUNTED and THE HAUNTING(the 60's version).

7/10

The Prowler (1981)

Nasty slasher

[9/10 · 10 August 2001]

Why the hell isn't this movie on DVD. It's just about the best slasher released in the 80's(if not ever). It's suspenseful, has truly nasty and gory murder scenes and the scares are well set up. I need this movie uncut on DVD, come on ANCHOR BAY, what are you waiting for.

Bruiser (2000)

OK

[10 July 2001]

OK pretty much sums up Bruiser actually. I don't want to be too hard on it, but it just doesn't offer much at all. The acting is OK(Flemyng's acting is generally good although when he has to display anger he seems very false and I must admit that Stormare is excellent in a completely over the top role), the direction is OK, the writing is OK and the ending is weak and crap. There is just nothing to set it apart from a million other made for cable/direct to video thrillers. It does have a good concept, but once the novelty wears off(pretty quickly), it just becomes a movie about a guy killing anyone he doesn't like(which could still be good, but it isn't in this film).

It's been a long time since the highs of DAWN OF THE DEAD and MARTIN and I don't know that Romero's work will ever reach those heights again.

5/10

Primitif (1978)

Very average cannibal film

[4/10 · 9 March 2001]

When I first found this film at my local video store I thought it must have been a retitled version of one of the Lenzi or Deodato cannibal films as I had never heard of it before. After watching it I wish it had been.

There is something almost authentic about the Italian cannibal films, where as this comes across as exactly what it is, a cheapo jungle adventure. The natives in this one ham it up way to much in my opinion.

I have mentioned cannibals a few times already, but there is no actual cannibalism in this film(people are speared and taken by crocodiles), although it is mentioned by some characters in the film, it is however in the same vein as the Italian cannibal films. There is of course plenty of violence against animals and some hilariously badly inserted stock footage(very grainy) of a leopard attacking or being attacked by crocodiles and a snake killing a furry critter of some sort.

Some scenes are OK, such as the scenes set inside a cave, where two of the central characters are held captive, being urinated on while trapped in a cage and being forced on to all fours and ridden around like a horse, but in the main it is badly acted and pretty boring.

The version that I saw looked like it was cut, although I would not think that an uncut version would be all that gory anyway as there doesn't seem to be that much opportunity for extreme violence with the situations that are created.

Only seek this one out if you have to see every cannibal(?) movie ever made.

Don't Go Near the Park (1979)

Wow, this is bad

[1/10 · 1 February 2001]

The language that I need to use to describe this film is unprintable. All I can say is DO NOT WATCH THIS FILM under any circumstances. If someone threatens to kill you if you don't watch this film, choose death(and keep some dignity). I've never died, but it can't be worse than watching this. I personally, am scarred for life.

They Call Me Bruce (1982)

Brilliant martial arts spoof

[10/10 · 30 June 2000]

The jokes are stupid and Johnny Yune's acting is atrocious, but this is one of the funniest comedies ever made.

Best line- "I'm a sex object, when I ask women for sex, they object"

Trust me on this one.

Torso (1973)

Beautiful women save slasher flick

[7/10 · 9 June 2000]

In many ways this is a fairly average Italian slasher pic, but it stands out from the rest by having possibly the most beautiful women ever to have featured in this type of film.

The gore effects are extremely unconvincing, especially a pathetic eye gouging seen and a head being smashed against a wall by a car.

Apart from the poor effects there are a few atmospheric scenes, a nice soundtrack and the dubbing isn't as bad as it could be.

Overall it's a decent film and worth checking out if your into this sort of thing.

I viewed this film on the uncut/unrated DVD released by Anchor Bay.(nice picture, although a bit grainy in darker scenes)