Christmas Vacation (1989)
Doris Roberts: Frances Smith
Photos
Quotes
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Frances : [looking at Ruby Sue surprised] Oh my gosh, her eyes aren't crossed anymore.
Eddie : That somethin' ain't it? She falls down a well, her eyes go crossed. She gets kicked by a mule. They go back to normal. I don't know.
[laughs]
Eddie : And this here's our pride and joy Snots.
[Snots blusters a sneeze]
Clark : Pretty name Ed.
Eddie : [Snots puts his snotty nose on Rusty, and he makes a disgusted face] Yeah we named him that because he's got this sinus condition. Snots you roll over and let uncle Clark scratch your belly.
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[after Clark fails at lighting all the exterior Christmas lights at the "lighting ceremony" in front of the entire family]
Frances : Talk about pissing your money away. I hope you kids see what a silly waste of resources this was.
Audrey : He worked really hard, Grandma.
Art : So do washing machines.
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Audrey : [Peeling a carrot] Would it be indecent to ask the grandparents to stay at a hotel?
Ellen : Audrey!
Audrey : Well can we at least forbid them to answer the phone? Alexander called this morning and grandpa Clark told him... I couldn't come to the phone 'cause I was going to the bathroom.
Ellen : We're all making sacrifices, Audrey.
Audrey : Everybody? Do you sleep with your brother? Do you know how sick and twisted that is, mom?
Ellen : [Grabs a box of matches off the fridge] Well, I'm sleeping with your father. Don't be so dramatic.
Audrey : I have nightmares about what he does in his bed alone when I'm not lying right next to him.
Ellen : Well, I don't know what to say, except it's Christmas and we're all in misery.
[Lights up a cigarette to smoke and Frances calls out from the next room]
Frances : Ellen, are you smoking again?
[Ellen puts out the cigarette]
Ellen : No!
[Grabs a cabbage and chops it in half]