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Star Wars: The Clone Wars: The Phantom Apprentice (2020)
Mindblowingly fantastic.
Far and away the best Clone Wars episode thus far, somehow topping the perfection of the one before it. Everything from the dialogue, the voice acting, the animation, Revenge of the Sith tie-ins, music, pacing, writing and THE FIGHTS are perfect. Sam Witwer deserves all of the awards imaginable for his performance in this episode; The desperation and venom in his voice is chilling and genuine, constantly managing to make Maul's goals and beliefs feel realistic. And the final fight scene is absolutely phenomenal and the choreography matched with the incredible motion capture make it one of the most incredible moments in the entire show. This entire story arc might just be one of the best pieces of Star Wars media ever created, and I cannot wait for the next episode. Even if it isn't as good as this one, it doesn't really need to be. And honestly, it'll be hard to get close to topping it.
Avengers: Endgame (2019)
A film that is ultimately saved by its incredible final act.
I used to hail this film as some sort of masterpiece for months, and then every time I rewatched it I just started to like it less. To Endgame's credit, it wraps up a lot of things beautifully and has some genuinely tear-jerking scenes. Tony, Steve, Natasha and Clint had their arcs wrapped up fantastically (even if Steve has a bit of a grey area relating to another 100 year old man he said he'd be with "until the end of the line") and the CGI is obviously top tier. Coupled with an absolutely incredible third act that is paced perfectly, filled with some of the best delivered fan service I have ever seen and has one of the most epic, emotionally powerful scenes that I have ever seen from any film, and it always gives me goosebumps.
But when you take away that third act as well as the payoffs that were executed well, Endgame starts to fall apart quickly. Thor and Hulk had genuinely awful conclusions to their character arcs. Thor's one is definitely the most divisive among fans and I definitely see what they tried to do and it certainly made sense considering the narrative, but the way it was executed just didn't work. Hulk on the other hand was just straight up confusing, with his entire arc that was built up through Infinity War being solved OFF SCREEN and then not having him do anything for a good chunk of the movie. Not only that but the movie is a complete mishmash of tones. It's argued that Infinity War also had this problem to some extent, but it was able to actually balance those tones well considering the movie's structure and pacing. In Endgame, the emotional scenes and the comedy scenes are too close together and don't get enough time to breathe. I know it might be too much to ask a three hour movie to take a little more time with its pacing, but the second act of this film is an utter mess. Granted, some of the emotional scenes do work and the jokes aren't half bad (unless they involve Thor), but they are placed so sporadically that it just comes off as distracting. THEN there's the whole time travel fiasco. The time travel in Endgame, when explained, does genuinely make sense, it's just that when they try to incorporate the Infinity Stones into the time travel as if they control the flow of time then the movie collapses. It completely contradicts what we've been led to believe about the time travel that they're trying to do and generally doesn't make any sense. If they're simply going to an alternate timeline that's in the past, then what part do the Infinity Stones actually play in that? I get changing stuff will create another timeline, but the Infinity Stones creating the flow of time doesn't make a lick of sense at all. And everyone's made a load of memes about it already, but the rat being the thing to kickstart the movie is impossibly contrived and dumb, regardless of Doctor Strange's plan. I don't wanna put a spoiler warning on this review so I won't explain the exact details, but it really is ridiculous.
Other than the second act of the film throwing a wrench in the entire product, the first act is really well done, if just a tad boring at times. It has a consistent tone, balances the comedy and drama relatively well, basically does everything that the second act should've. Even with all of the time travel stuff, Endgame would be a whole lot better if the second act was actually cohesive and had a good balance of tones.
Overall, is Endgame a decent film? I'd say yes, and a satisfying one at that. But is it good? Hard question, because the film is technically well made and has a good first and third act, it's just that the third act takes up so much of the movie and puts so many holes and issues into the whole product. Is it as good as Infinity War? HELL no. Infinity War is still a fantastic film that does everything this movie did but correctly (minus the time travel of course). It is a shame to see the final chapter of the MCU almost go down in flames and to only be saved by a competently done third act, but I guess the Russo's just got a bit carried away when trying to wrap things up.
Bloodshot (2020)
Coronavirus delays basically guarantee this movie an Oscar.
Everything has been pushed back at this point, some even weeks before release, so unfortunately we've only been graced with this so far this year among "Birds of Prey", "Sonic the Hedgehog" and "Onward" in terms of big releases, while the other movies will only release in the Summer. Truly a time to be alive. Oh and this movie sucked, truly shocking - unlike it's own plot. This was an incredibly generic and predictable snorefest with some incoherent and mildly entertaining action, featuring Vin Diesel because it just isn't a mediocre action flick without him, Dwayne Johnson or Jason Statham being involved.
Birds of Prey and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn (2020)
Fragments of a potentially good movie are to be found, but never put together.
I originally thought this movie was only serviceable, but watching it for the second time really opened my eyes to how bad it really is. The acting all around is a mixed bag, definitely down to the director as these actors and actresses are definitely talented and can work with the right people. The jokes are very hit or miss, trying to be the DCEU equivalent to Deadpool while at the same time trying to do it's own thing which results in many scattershot attempts at humour that fail to make an impression. The script as a whole functions OK enough when you don't really think about it, but it's all of the other elements of the film that drag it down. The Birds of Prey themselves are barely in this film, so not calling it "Harley Quinn: Birds of Prey" from the get-go was an odd marketing choice.
I'll say the movie has some elements of fun like some of the action, a decent soundtrack and unique visuals, but it isn't enough to save a deeply flawed film, regardless of what kind of political agenda it may have had.
Onward (2020)
Good, but pales in comparison to Pixar's library of success.
I doubted this movie would be bad, it's Pixar after all and they're basically the only studio who can guarantee a good animated experience these days. And while Onward is certainly a good movie with spectacular animation, a decent plot and a knockout ending, the rest of the film feels strangely controlled and contained. It feels like there's a potential masterpiece here that's trapped in the confines of a good movie. The jokes worked for the most part and I'd say that Pixar's comedy has definitely improved overtime, but the rest of the film just doesn't feel traditionally Pixar. I didn't go in expecting to compare it to films like The Incredibles and Toy Story, but was still underwhelmed. The characters are fine and the voice cast do a good job, and the plot manages to function without much fault, but there is so much potential with this idea and this kind of film specifically that just isn't fully realised. I will say however, hear me out, that the ending is one of the best endings to a Pixar movie I have ever seen. It's fantastic, and if the previous acts of the movie kept up with that kind of quality then this would be one of my favourite Pixar films, without a shadow of a doubt.
Deep Blue Sea (1999)
Every death in this movie is hilarious.
This movie is so mind-numbingly bad and filled with holes, rock stupid characters, cliches and over-exaggerated performances that it's actually brilliant. The horrifically bad CGI (even for 1999 standards) adds to that brilliance, COUPLED with the fact that every death in this movie is so over the top and poorly executed whilst the soundtrack basically screams at you adds to this movie being a true masterpiece of unintentional comedy. It really needs to be seen to be believed, because if I told you right now that this movie's events would happen because a stretcher bearer fell and caused a helicopter to crash and explode on a fat woman in a tower, you would NOT believe me. (Can't really count as a spoiler since, y'know, 1999)
I Am Not Okay with This (2020)
It's fine I guess.
I'm not exactly blown away by this, but the writing and pacing certainly do work and Sophie Lillis gives a good performance. I felt as if the show was a bit confused at points with what it's best aspects were until the last few episodes where it begins to pick up a lot. It's very predictable at points too, and it really just felt like they wanted a second season to truly flesh it out. I'd be willing to give a second season a try as, given what's been set up here, it could be very interesting and possibly even great. This first season is giving me a lot of BoJack Horseman vibes, as in it feels like there's a potentially amazing show here that with a second season could truly bloom and become what it was always meant to be, but is held back by just being a set-up for future episodes. Overall it's certainly not terrible and is decent enough, but it takes a while for it to truly realise its strengths.
The Call of the Wild (2020)
"We'll just CGI the dog, that won't look soulless at all!"
I think we've officially reached the point where movies are now made without any soul or creative vision. This is not only a remake of an already existing film, but it is plagued with unnecessary CGI that looks obvious and is incredibly distracting. Those two elements are put together to make a film that is, while admittedly serviceable, ultimately the product of a corporation/company, not an artist. Harrison Ford always does a good job and at times the movie is heartwarming, but it's also cheesy and at times even boring.
Am I just out of touch or is this just the norm for film nowadays?
13 Reasons Why (2017)
A harmful show for its target audience that started bad, got worse, and then turned into one of the worst shows I have ever watched.
I honestly struggle to find words to describe how abysmal this show is, but I'm going to try my best:
13 Reasons Why is not only a very harmful show for it's teenage demographic that it claims it wants to help, not only does it not give its rather good source material an ounce of respect in its first season, not only does it forget the source material even exists in the second and third season by trying to be its own thing (which is a problem that Game Of Thrones shares), not only is the script a complete and utter mess with no narrative thread and full of inconsistencies, NOT ONLY does it treat the topic of suicide with no grace or respect, it COMPLETELY fails at being the most BASIC melodramatic teen drama and that alone is amusing.
Truly, this has to be one of, if not the, worst thing that Netflix has ever made.
Supergirl (2015)
One of the worst shows I've seen in some time.
The acting gets worse and worse overtime, the plot is a mess with some of the most convoluted and mediocre writing I've seen come from a superhero related piece of media, the show has literally NO STAKES at all, and the CGI and effects are the worst of the worst. They are GOD AWFUL and dated by 2003 standards. Comparing the CGI in LOTR to this honestly makes me cry in pain. I won't get into the politics either because it honestly doesn't need to be mentioned. This is a hot, messy dumpster fire and I'm surprised that the new episodes keep getting approved.
Downhill (2020)
An unfunny, unpleasant ripoff of a movie that's actually decent.
Called it based off of all you want, it's a clear ripoff. And it's bad. VERY bad. The humour doesn't work, the bickering is unpleasant to listen to and the title best describes the film itself rather than the events that happened. There isn't even a lot to say on this because it's so uninspired. It's an awkward, unfunny and needlessly depressing mess.
Glitch Techs (2020)
Pure Unbridled Fun
Glitch Techs is a very, VERY good cartoon and might be the best thing Nickelodeon has put out in years. Despite a few uses of outdated gamer slang at times as well as the phrase "Like a boss" at one point (although to be fair it was said by a character that was meant to be obnoxious), the writing is solid overall with quickly paced delivery that works most of the time, with characters that complement the writing very well. Five and Miko are very charming and well developed protagonists, and not at one point do they border on annoying or intolerable. The music is also fantastic, it might be one of the best soundtracks to an animated show I've heard in a long time. And the animation is STUNNING. The lighting and colours are eye popping and the fluidity and kinetic energy of each action scene is truly a sight to behold. It's been a long time since there's been a major action cartoon, but Glitch Techs looks to fill in that gap. I hope that more people see this as we only have nine episodes so far and more should definitely be made. Please support this show if you want more original animated content in the future.
Sonic the Hedgehog (2020)
Surpassed all of the negativity surrounding it; A genuinely fun movie.
Everyone knows about the old design, the terrible first trailer and all of that so I won't waste any time on that, but this movie was so much better than expected. It's obviously not a fantastic film, but as a fun fuelled kids film that respects the franchise and character of Sonic The Hedgehog, it's a pretty entertaining ride. There were quite a few jokes that worked, Jim Carrey stole the show as expected, Sonic himself was very likable and entertaining, and the film itself is just a lot of fun. Silly and corny at times, sure, but it's not a bad film by any means. The CGI was also pretty decent, minus a few scenes that could've been polished up a bit, but after the original design was revealed we were all bracing ourselves for the worst quality film possible. Thankfully, this movie did the impossible and trudged through all of the negativity and responded to the negative feedback very well. Even without the redesign (although it does make the movie a lot more cute and charming), the movie would still work as a competently made flick. And judging by the surprisingly great end credits scene (Not spoiling), we could be getting a sequel that I'd totally be down for.
Ragnarok (2020)
An unintentionally funny (but at the same time oddly boring?) boat of trash.
The dialogue is especially strange and the acting is passible in places, but everything else about this show falls pretty flat. People saying that they're "taking the story back from Marvel" and saying that it's educating those who "think Marvel tells the actual story" are idiots. Not a single person thinks that anything Marvel does is comparable to Norse mythoglogy, and if you think that this show does Norse mythology actual justice then you're very wrong. Yes the scenery is nice, yes some of the acting is fine, and yes it's competent in places and makes for average entertainment, but the many aspects of it that were straight up bad or painfully meh could not be ignored. There are quite a few parts where the show does something funny without realising and the characters are very inconsistent and clumsily written with moments that are comparable to the damn Twilight saga. The climate change message is also welcome, but poorly done.
Overall this isn't really worth your time unless you're looking for a dumb teen drama to laugh at or if you just want something on in the background while you scroll through Twitter to feel good about yourself for having Netflix in the first place.
The Gentlemen (2019)
Welcome back Ritchie.
After such a long period of repeated missfires and last year's disastrous Aladdin remake, Guy Ritchie has divorced himself from the mouse and has come back in full swing with The Gentlemen, a film harking back to his two previous cult classic gangster films "Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels" and "Snatch". And it's just what you would want if you loved those movies. The acting is pretty good all around and the pacing is as quick as you'd expect, but what really makes this movie is the writing itself. Just like with Snatch and Lock Stock, the dialogue is clever, witty and has a lot more meaning behind it than you may realise, which is another thing I love about Ritchie's films: They actually require you to PAY ATTENTION. So many people just switch a film on and don't think about anything that's happening. Ritchie basically bends those people over and forces them to think about what is happening and what is being said. This is why you find a lot of people who say they found Snatch to be confusing due to all of the plotlines happening at the same time as well as them not paying attention to what is actually being said. Which is a shame because the dialogue in Ritchie's films is insanely funny and brimming with wit. Snatch is probably better in terms of dialogue simply because I can quote every line in the film at this point, but The Gentlemen has a lot of great lines for sure. It isn't all humour of course, but I thought I'd just go over what makes Ritchie's films so good when compared to other things released nowadays.
Overall I would HIGHLY recommend The Gentlemen for people who loved Ritchie's previous gangster films as well as those who haven't watched anything he's made before and want a good place to start. It may be hard to get used to, especially with how vulgar it is compared to the rest of the politically correct garbage being dumped out of Hollywood these days, but it's certainly worth paying to see.
A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood (2019)
The first film I've seen in years that has deeply affected me.
This may get a little personal, but I've been suffering from severe depression and have had a lot of issues dealing with anger, sadness and all for about five years now. For the past 8 years of my life, and earlier years of my childhood, I have loved Fred Rogers. He always told me and millions of children all over the world that he likes us just the way we are, and taught us the power of kindness, positive ways of thinking and dealing with our emotions, and while I'll always be a cynic by nature, I've always tried to take what he taught me and many others to heart. He was genuinely the kindest, most loving and compassionate human being to ever grace this Earth. But over the past year especially, I've stopped caring about my life with tragedy happening around me constantly, making me feel like my life was falling apart, as well as me having thoughts of suicide. I always put Mr Rogers on to give me some kind of motivation to keep going, but his messages that once resonated so deeply with me began to fade as I slipped further and further away from being "fine". I've gotten a lot better over the past few months though, not perfect but still, and when I heard that a movie starring Tom Hanks as Mr Rogers was being made I did all that I could to see it as fast as possible when it finally came out in the UK (which as of writing this, was yesterday).
The second this film started, the moment Hanks appeared and the music came on, I just completely melted. I almost audibly broke down into tears, but not with sadness, with joy and relief. I knew I was in for something that would grip me. This film is amazing. It focuses on the psychological healing and betterment of the protagonist, Lloyd, as Mr Rogers taps into his childhood and his feelings, the same way he tapped into the feelings of children back when his show was still on the air and back when I watched it a decade ago, and we get a powerful, touching tribute to this man and the impact he had on so many lives. Lloyd himself was not only well acted, but for me anyway I saw a bit of myself in him. Things like his strained relations with family, his overwhelming and blinding cynicism and his anger management are all things I dealt with at some point and still deal with today. So when the film took this character and and put him on this emotional journey to betterment and healing, it resonated so deeply with me that I began to feel as if I was a kid again, watching Rogers as he taught me how to deal with my own anger and to prioritise kindness, and for many people who saw this film, I feel like they experienced the same thing I did. And that's why this movie is so good. It has the same impact and kind-heartedness as Rogers' original show, but turned into an emotional, thoughtful and touching feature-length film that acts as the perfect tribute to Fred's legacy and life. At the end of the day though, the film, while an amazing tribute to Fred, isn't entirely about him. It's about how he saved the life of Lloyd, became one of his closest friends, and helped him heal his psychological wounds. And the perfect way to put this film is this: It's a film that celebrates the messages, kindness and life of Mr Rogers, that acts as a way to show the impact that he had on so many lives, and despite him not being in the film as much as Lloyd, who is the main protagonist of the film, his impact is felt throughout its entire runtime and in every single scene.
Other things as well, the blending of the old Mr Rogers sets with locations in the film was very creative and touching, the acting, especially from Hanks was incredible, the film was perfectly paced and while the score isn't anything to talk about, the parts that do use music are done very well and capture the feel of the scene. The editing might've been a little iffy at points, but that was mainly at the beginning of the film. Overall, it's probably my favourite movie of 2019, even if I did have to wait until 2020 to watch it. If you have not watched it yet, please do. It's absolutely phenomenal.
Doctor Who (2005)
Oh how it used to be so great.
Those 5 stars remain as a reflection of my nostalgia and love for how this series was before it was handicapped. If I wanted to rate the new seasons then I would give it a 1, maybe 2 if I'm generous. The scripts and stories are awful, sometimes even dull which is the complete OPPOSITE of Doctor Who. The new episodes also seem to focus on shoving a woke political agenda down the audience's throats (there's literally an episode with a political jackass who is meant to represent Donald Trump, and regardless of how you feel about him you have to admit that's low hanging fruit), and Jodie is a terrible doctor. Nothing to do with the fact that she's a woman, she's just not doing a good job. I guess I can't blame her entirely, with the scripts she's given I'm surprised she's still bothering to continue. While the production values are good, for the most part, the new Doctor Who is so poorly written that it drags the rest of this once fantastic series down.
Star Trek: Picard (2020)
Filmed beautifully, but it doesn't make sense in the Star Trek universe.
Decent acting and good cinematography aside, good lord this blows. Numerous continuity errors and a story that doesn't make any sense, in a "This doesn't make any sense in terms of logic and reason" way. There are multiple elements that are just plain dumb (Our Sun cannot factually go supernova, and in Star Trek, TV hasn't been used for centuries, just to name two without spoiling) and there are so many annoying inconsistencies. Just like the recent Star Trek movies and shows, it honestly feels like the writers never actually watched Star Trek. Also, there are FIVE writers just for the first episode, so that probably explains why everything is so mind numbingly inconsistent and incoherent. There are too many ideas placed into one episode and the result is a poorly written mess that is only saved by Patrick Stewart's performance. (Also, without spoiling anything, what they did with the Federation is truly terrible and might be the worst part about this show.)
Bombshell (2019)
Means well, but gradually devolves into uninteresting slop.
This film would've been a great one if they actually went full on with what it was doing, but sadly we just get a shallow film that feels like it was only made for people in Hollywood and literally no one else on Earth. There's a lot about the actual real life subject matter that would've been great to explore in film, and while the performances are great, it just doesn't do the subject justice.
The Mandalorian (2019)
A New Hope
The Mandalorian, while far from perfect, is a pretty good show that might just be the saving grace that Star Wars needs. After the movies continued to disappoint in ways previously thought unimaginable, with some of them being even worse than the prequels, we get a TV show that feels fresh. Which is strange, as the show doesn't exactly do anything that hasn't been done before. That's also my main issue with it, but for Star Wars, it's just what the franchise needed. No more bloated, overwhelming CGI, no overstuffed and horribly paced stories, no gaping plot holes, and no over-reliance on nostalgia (although there is still some of that but not to the extent of the sequel trilogy). It's a solid, well-designed, decently written and competently acted ride that contains a few surprises but not much else that could be considered new. It's simple, but effective. I hope Season 2 improves on the aspects that limited Season 1 and that we can have something that truly rivals the original trilogy, but this is still a fun and comfortable watch from start to finish (minus episodes 4 and 5).
Bad Boys for Life (2020)
A pleasant surprise
This movie mainly plays on the core strengths of its predecessors and as someone who really doesn't like the first two, this movie is honestly rather decent if you want to watch a fun movie to just escape from reality for a second. It's far from perfect but if you're looking for a good time then this is a hearty recommendation. There was also a pretty damn good plot twist which caught me off guard. Overall, this is probably the best film to star Will Smith in ages and definitely the best Bad Boys movie.
Uncut Gems (2019)
Apparently this is a good film because it makes you feel anxious...what?
Yes, it made me feel anxious and stressed, that isn't a good thing. I'm susceptible to panic attacks and have terrible anxiety, so this film didn't really help that. I get that this was the intention, but if your intention is to make it impossible for people to relax and watch your movie, then you're deranged. Who wants to have their senses tortured when watching a movie? Horror films produce thrills that can make for a fun watch, but having a film try to be as obnoxious and loud as possible to make you feel anxious is NOT fun. There are boundaries on what constitutes for a good idea when it comes to playing on human feelings, this is one that should always be kept off limits. Other than that I think Adam Sandler did a good job but I could barely focus on him.
Gisaengchung (2019)
A masterful emotional rollercoaster
Bong Joon-Ho is an outstanding director, and this might be his best work yet. Parasite is one of the best movies of the entire decade, hell I'd go as far as saying no other movie this decade quite matches it. It's funny, it's heartbreaking, it's intense. It does all of this while not feeling tonally inconsistent or confused, which is something that many films fail to do. The acting is incredible and the characters themselves are fantastic, with no good guys or bad guys: They're people. They feel like real and believable characters, which is such a refreshing change of pace from all of the bloated action movies that we get every year. It's well shot, as to be expected, and the social commentary is fantastic.
This is the first movie I've seen in the longest time that I can describe as perfect, I loved every single bit of it.
Dolittle (2020)
I never thought it would be THIS bad
This insipid pile of cinematic excrement that calls itself an adaptation of Dr Dolittle is a biblical screw up of the highest order. Littered with terrible jokes, the charm of a duck with schizophrenia and deserves to be called the first WORST movie of 2020. Not even Robert Downey Jr could salvage this mess, in fact it's like the script was stopping him from having any charisma whatsoever and oh GOD the script is a squishy glob of diarrhea. Every time the movie tried to be funny I almost passed out with how much it physically hurt me, and the CGI is plain wonky, especially for a movie that has a $175 MILLION DOLLAR BUDGET. How can you poor so much money into something that looks THAT bad??? Please stay away from Dolittle, it is pure cinematic torture and the fact that RDJ couldn't even save it is a good indicator of its quality.
The Grudge (2019)
What is this exactly?
The editing is super messy and the characters are just soulless meat-puppets. And the scares are just pathetic, forcing jumpscares left and right to try and catch the audience but no one in my cinema moved a muscle. I didn't like the original Grudge from 2004 as much as others, but it is light years ahead of this terrible laughing stock of a film.