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Reviews
The Woman King (2022)
A people should know wen they're conquered
Wow, women fought men in battle and prevented African's from ever becoming slaves??? That's amazing! Think about it. If women didn't dominate men on the battlefield, today, Africa might be completely controlled by other countries and corporate interests within those same foreign powers. Africa's inhabitants might have been forced to scratch around in the dirt, from sun up to sun down, extracting elements from the Earth, like lithium for Tesla's batteries and China's ever growing industrialization. The Gates Foundation might have set up shop there, actively trying to kill Africans in some misguided attempt at controlling the world's population. It's inhabitants may have been coerced into being guinea pigs for Pfizer's, 'jab.' Millions of people, saved from hundreds of years of oppression and murder, all thanks to some, 'girl power.' What an amazing fairy tale!!!! Almost as good as the Bible!
The Gringo Papi (2022)
redacted!!!!
His crumbling marriage and contempt towards his own children is more entertaining and amusing than anything in this, "speshul." Come on down to PF Chang's and hang with the homeless cats. He just GO's, Bappa's.
The Batman (2022)
Batman for Soyboy's
Pattinson looks as though he hasn't eaten meat in 7 years, strung out on tofu and they cast a small boy to play Catwoman. None of this even remotely resembles the world of Batman. Should have called it, "WokeMan" or "Bat-GenderNeutral." What a joke.
The Guilty (2021)
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I liked this movie better when it was called, "Cellular." And didn't they already re-do this movie few years back with Halle Berry in, "The Call?" That was only 8 years ago. Hollyweird has truly run out of ideas.
Snake Eyes: G.I. Joe Origins (2021)
What Origins????
This is one of the most poorly written scripts I've ever seen and some of the casting is awful. The female lead character is pointless. Baroness looks like a book-nerd version of Olive Oyl, instead of a buxom, ultra sexy, curvy dimey dime, and there is almost no "origin" to the origin story. Snake Eyes comes out of the womb with superior Ninja skills, apparently? He can destroy all opponents with superior fighting skill with zero explanation as to how those skills developed and where/when/how he learned them. Good fail, film makers.
The World to Come (2020)
Facsimile of a facsimile!
I liked this movie better when it was called, "Brokeback Mountain."
Nobody (2021)
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I liked this movie better when it was called, "John Wick."
The Woman in the Window (2021)
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I liked this movie better when it was called, "Rear Window," and later on, "Disturbia."
Stowaway (2021)
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I liked this movie better when it was called, "Sunshine."
Ava (2020)
Just say NO to rappers!
Stop putting Common in movies. He has the charisma and acting ability of wet paint!
Coming 2 America (2021)
THEY DID IT, CONGRATS!!!!!
Someone finally made a movie worse than, "Sweet Home Alabama." I didn't think it was possible, but somehow, science made it happen. I quit this movie roughly 6 minutes in....or whenever Wesley Snipes pimp slides (seriously!) his way on screen. It wasn't even remotely funny. Just cameos and woke-ism. This movie is where your funny bone goes to die!
When the World is Shaken (2020)
FAKE NEWS!!!!
This was a Plan-demic and nothing more. Don't believe the media lies!
Death to 2020 (2020)
OMB????
Don't even need to watch to guess. It's an OMB Network production so it's an hour of nothing but, "Orange Man Bad!!!!" Amiright????
Tenet (2020)
PrOn has more believable acting
I've seen better acting in BangBros productions! And can we turn up the dialogue in the audio mix? Can't understand 90% of what's being said.
Unhinged (2020)
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I liked this movie better when it was called, "Falling Down."
The Go-Go's (2020)
A lot of glossing over......
Showtime does subpar documentaries in comparison to their rival, HBO, but this one was okay. Just a lot of glossing over relevant information. So, Charlotte has a massive drug problem. How about you tell us HOW that was and how it affected everything and everyone around her? Band members repeatedly state Charlotte was out of control, even saying, "She was so out of control, Ozzy Osbourne banned her from his dressing room." And that's it. No details, whatsoever. Now THAT'S a story everyone would want to hear. Outside of those details, it was fun watching all the footage of these adorable cutie pies. I didn't realize how many of their songs I actually knew, probably because they appeared on so many movies and tv commercials. Worth a watch if you're an 80's baby and general music fan.
The New Mutants (2020)
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I liked this movie better when it was called, "X-Men."
Project Power (2020)
Facsimile of a Facsimile
::Original review removed at 300 likes. Help me get back what was taken by a hater!::
I liked this movie better when it was called, "Limitless."
The War with Grandpa (2020)
Facsimile of a Facsimile
I liked this movie better when it was called, "Problem Child 2."
Luce (2019)
Age check???
Bro, why does the Asian girlfriend look 47 when she's supposed to be 17????
I See You (2019)
The Mumlen?????
Bro, what happened to Helen Hunt's face? I haven't seen someone look that withered and wrinkled since Jessie and Mr. White were stranded in the desert. Time for a, "The Mummy," re-boot staring her face! Bring back Tales From The Crypt with Ms. Hunt playing the Crypt Keeper. Jesus! She's unbearable to look at!
Just Mercy (2019)
More like "Just Kill Me!"
How does this have an overall rating of 7.5???? HOW???? This movie is like, if the Government had a step by stop process for watching paint dry and you followed it to the 'T.' It's SO paint by numbers, boring, and predictable. You know how each scene is going to play out before it's even presented on screen. All the characters are stereotypical. Black mom is thrifty and cracks jokes about poverty. All the white people are evil bigots, UNLESS it's a white woman, than she's ok,cuz she's down with the struggle, or whatever. They should just rename this movie, "White Man Bad!" That's it's intent, right? To paint of white men as evil monsters who blood lust against non-whites? Give me a break! But the most egregious error was Michael B. Jordan presenting himself in court with that ratty, unkempt facial hair. After having worked in the legal system for years, I declare with certainty, a Judge would have halted proceedings and instructed Mr. Jordan leave court and return only when clean shaven and presentable or be found in contempt!!!
Charlie's Angels (2019)
Reboot Inception!!!!
Wow, another reboot, of a reboot, of a reboot. Hey, Hollywood, since you and Brad Pitt think John Bolton has all the answers, ask him why your movies suck so much!!!!
21 Bridges (2019)
This is not the gritty cop drama you seek!
If you're looking for a gritty, grimy, entertaining but realistic cop drama, watch, "Crown Vic," instead of this trash. I worked the streets for decades. Crown Vic is the best cop movie since End Of Watch.
Terminator: Dark Fate (2019)
Telamundo Terminator!
Seriously, what is this??? Some cruel joke? For the fist 30 minutes, I thought I was watching the South Park episode, "Mexican Joker," This was funny, too....but for all the wrong reasons. This film has none of the elements that made T1 and T2, two of the greatest sci-fi movies ever made. None of the witty dialogue. None of the emotional connections. Arnold does his best to polish a turd, but he only has so much varnish to work with. When Arnold picks up his sunglasses and you're expecting "bad to the bone" to fire up on que and he then proceeds to set them down and walk away. I was furious! What a crock. They destroyed whatever legacy remained this franchise. Skip it.