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Reviews
The Dead Ones (2019)
A Predictable Yet Well Told Tale
I cannot understand how some people miss the whole point and concept of this film. I admit I guessed the whole plot and twist about 20 minutes in, yet that did not spoil my enjoyment because I watched it properly.
Scottie, Mouse, Emily and Louis are all driven to their high school with instructions that they have to clean up the mess they made. The place is aged and derelict. Not just your standard graffiti here and there, we're talking run to the ground closed off forever look to it. Ms Persephone is the tutor in charge, hard stone faced doesn't take any messing kind of teacher.
What we also witnessed pre credits was a group of high school kids tormenting a young lad who has his face covered in a video which went viral on YouTube. This of course connects with the plot in a big way. Before we go there, our teens look bewildered at the chaos whilst Persephone threatens that Ammit will eat their hearts. Mouse explains the Egyptian God status and why Ammit consumes the sinful hearts.
Outside in the darkness, four people are putting on hideous masks to represent the Horsemen and are getting ready for something. They head into the school after chaining the doors up. We find out that Emily is off her medication, so is becoming quite erratic in her behaviour from the start. After Scottie sees the four masked figures who run past him totally ignoring him, Mouse looks for Ms Persephone. The tutor is sat in her office surrounded by photos of a screaming child. Mouse asks if the heating can be turned down a bit. "But it's so cold." says the woman and turns, half her head is missing.......
Thus begins a continued nightmare as visions and nasty things occur moment after moment, reminding me very much of Event Horizon.
The use of the darkness and the derelict corridors is perfectly old school, turning the building itself into a character.
It all comes together and clearly explains the goings on which many will have (like myself) guessed by a certain early point in the film. The Dead Ones is a simple tale well written and excellently played. Recommended for Halloween viewing or just a creepy night in.
K-Shop (2016)
One of the Best Everyday Man Psychopath Films from the UK
I think it's the fact I'm on the wrong side of 40 now, or I'm a grumpy old bugger, but I can laugh with glee at a film such as this. This low budget masterpiece from the UK shows how the weekend gang of party animals truly looks. There are scenes in this flick of men pissing in the street, men and women fighting/being sick/fighting with coppers/shouting/passing out/wearing mad clothes, etcetera. In fact, some lads even kick a blow up sheep around at one point. Genius! Apparently most of the footage is real candid videos as well, which makes me laugh even more.
Before you reckon this is some government sponsored anti-drinking campaign film, nope, don't worry. What it is rates as perhaps one of the best psychopathic everyday man stories from these shores since Tony (2009).
Young student, Salah (Ziad Abaza) returns from university to his Father's battered kebab and chips shop which is situated in a rough weekend part of town (Bournemouth, to be exact). His Father is planning to open a restaurant, but due to his continuing ill health, Salah insists his Dad retire. One night, he runs the shop whilst his Dad is recovering in hospital, and he witnesses the plight of British people and their binge drinking as a fight between a man dressed like an Oompa Loompa and another guy dressed as a Golfer explodes. (Why does Salah always leave his laptop out on a table???)
"They are drunk. They don't mean it." says his Father upon returning to the shop after hearing about it. His eyes have seen many terrible things late nights. The Police aren't able to help with the damage. "Sorry, busy night." Smiles the officer.
It isn't long afterwards that a gang of lads tries to get into the shop before opening time. His Dad pushes them away gently until one shoves him down to the ground. His head smacks the pavement, he's dead when the ambulance arrives. Salah is in pieces. There's no CCTV footage due to none being installed down that street, nobody saw anything, and his Dad's health is brought into account. Salah is powerless. Filled with rage and disappointment, he decides to stay a while and temporarily run his Father's shop, whilst a brand new club is due to open nearby, run by a Big Brother contestant, Jason Brown (the same building his Dad looked to gain for the restaurant).
K-Shop is divided into chapter headings of a sort. When 'Jackpot' pops up, that's when the fun truly begins. The shop is waiting for a delivery of lamb kebab so Salah is annoyed. As he closes up, one lad is asleep and drooling on the table top. He shakes him a couple of times, but the kid is zoned out. He checks his ID, "You got five minutes, Scotty." Salah smiles and heads into the basement. Returning, he's stunned to find the kid frying some chips. "What are you doing?" he blurts. "I paid for this!" snaps Scott. They fight for control of the fryer and the lad plummets head first into the frying fat. Salah drags him out and breaks down. The kid's face is a mass of oozing sores. Scott is dead. Should Salah ring the police? He grabs the phone then imitates the scenario of a possible conversation. "Hi, I've just slam dunked a kid's head in the fryer and killed him. 'That's quite reasonable, Mr. Kebab Man, we'll send someone round right away to collect the body.'" He decides it isn't a good plan and stares at Scott's t-shirt which reads Jackpot. Only one way out of this. He chops and minces him, covers the meat with seasoning and slaps it all into the Elephant Penis sized kebab. Years pass, Salah keeps on killing and selling his notorious kebab meat to his drunken punters. There's loads of people missing articles plastered to the wall in his basement. He takes down dealers, racists, etcetera, but his main nemesis is Jason 'Slushy' Brown, the guy who runs all the drugs on the nightclub strewn streets. We have a few subplots, such as a pointless time filling development of a romance, a young lad who sees too much and works weekends with Salah, neither tale does much to the overall story line.
Some reviewers on other sites say this is a simple vigilante movie and toss it aside like the salad off a kebab. It's much more. Helped by the gore effects and the excellent central acting, K-Shop bounces along at a decent pace. Ziad Abaza plays Salah carefully, not overdoing it, just having the correct level of grief and oncoming madness. There's a low burning scene wherein Salah gets to know one of his potential victims whilst chained in the basement. They exchange ditties about their childhoods and fathers. As they talk, they get to understand one another.
The effects are totally off the wall with their realistic butchering scenes.Chopping, mincing, seasoning, all needed to ready human meat for the kebab stick!
This is writer/director Dan Pringle's first feature length project and it doesn't show. He has a master class in tension as moments in the shop and basement build to fever pitch, mainly between Salah and Jason. Highly enjoyable and makes you think.