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tonyhennessey1
Reviews
The Colony (2013)
Don't waste your time watching
This was an incredibly poor film in terms of plot, dialogue and major goofs. I've wasted an hour and a half of my life watching it so you don't have to. So why is it so bad? Well let's see - cannibals that seem to have lost the power of speech and grunt or 'grrragh' their way through each scene they are in. Heavy snow fall that doesn't cover foot tracks even after several hours. There is a major bridge explosion to prevent the attacking cannibals from following their quarry, yet those pesky cannibals still manage to pick up the scent several hours later, again through a severe blizzard. Bill Paxton as Mason either has the worst clichéd lines to get through or he's just a complete ham of an actor. Either way the character is dreadful. Easily the worst film I've seen in the past couple of years. Watch and you shall see.
A Viking Saga: The Darkest Day (2013)
A wasted opportunity
It may have been a low budget film but it would have cost nothing to get a few people around a table with the script before filming. Come on, how many film clichés do you have to put into one film. I nearly stopped watching at one point because it was getting so bad. After each scene (and there weren't that many) I found myself asking 'would this have actually happened?'. I answered each time, 'highly unlikely'. The ending was just too funny for words. The acting was OK but I would have preferred some attempt at a Norse/Danish accent from the Vikings. I was just grateful in the end that there weren't any Americans involved (nothing personal, but American actors should never be allowed near historical productions). Finally, Vikings wearing chain mail at that time period? I doubt it.