califtom Reviews

CHIPS (2017)

Thoroughly awful

[1/10 · 29 December 2018]

This film was horrid and a complete insult to the classic TV show I had fond memories of growing up in the 1970's. How any Hollywood exec thought it a good idea to entrust a talentless, unfunny moron like Dax Shepard with this project is mind boggling. I could not stomach more than an hour of this trainwreck and just turned it off. AWFUL film in every way nobody should waste their time with. You'll enjoy yourself far more watching a few episodes of the original tv show.

Don't Know Yet (2013)

just awful

[1/10 · 15 June 2018]

This film is a complete mess. I'm actually shocked at some of the reviews and high rating this terrible movie has received. This is truly one of the worst films I have seen in a very long time. It was completely incoherent jumping in and out of flashback scenes to the point you never know whether its real time or in the past. The film had no flow to it whatsoever and never really goes anywhere. Not a single character in the film was believable or had any depth and everyone seemed to be just a caricature. You don't really learn anything about any of the characters while the dialogue was so rambling and unrealistic it was hard to take any of it seriously. The acting was mostly bad but with such a poor script it would be hard to make much of it anyway. Not one of the "hitchhikers" even remotely resembled anyone you would encounter in that situation and the attempts at comedy not only fell flat, they fell through the floor. Most of the scenes felt trite and forced. It might have been a decent concept for a road film but this movie missed the mark in a huge way. The cinematography and score were decent but outside of that there's not much of anything positive to say about this trainwreck of a film. I didn't know you could pack pointless, cheesy, incoherent and shallow into one film but they certainly accomplished that.

Lost in Space (2018–2021)

Another overtly PC trainwreck

[1/10 · 18 April 2018]

And yet another trainwreck of a production so nauseatingly PC it makes you want to vomit. Not one character is even remotely convincing in this show while the writing is so bad and predictable it feels like it was written by high school film students. This awful show is a perfect example of how authoritarian PC culture is not only a threat to free speech but to art as well. Being forced to make shows within the narrow confines of political correctness stifles creativity and results in the bad product you see here. I don't even have to go into the plot lines because you know them and have seen them already: Soccer mom type character miscast in an alpha male role, all the men portrayed as bumbling idiots who can't get out of their own way, diversity quotas, left wing political messages shoved into the script wherever possible, etc. Avoid this terrible show. You've already seen it a million times.

It (I) (2017)

Great film but liked the first cast better

[9/10 · 16 September 2017]

I really enjoyed this incarnation of IT but I can't help but be biased simply because I am such a fan of the original. There were some things better about this film and some things better about the original, but what stood out most was the cast of kids in the original were vastly superior. Each character in the original had an unusual quality that made them stand out in some way while the kids in this film just kind of blended in with the crowd. The Ritchie Tozier character in the original played by Seth Green was far better and I was a bit let down they took away most of what made him so funny and unique with the gags and jokes and stuff. They also left out Ben's backstory about his father who died in the war and the fact he and his mother were forced to live with relatives. That was an important part of the storyline I don't think they should have omitted. The story telling overall was better in the original with the way the group came together. The story in the current film did feel rushed at times but overall a very enjoyable movie.

Zapped! (1982)

Very fun, entertaining movie

[10/10 · 19 April 2017]

Another hilariously fun movie from the great decade of the 1980's. For as silly as this movie is at times, I laughed harder and more often than I do watching the vast majority of contemporary comedies. The clothes in this movie alone are a riot. The story, script and effects are ridiculous but its a thoroughly entertaining film from start to finish. Scatman Crothers has a couple of scenes that were so funny it brought tears to my eyes.

Tennessee Waltz (1989)

not perfect but still a very good film

[8/10 · 12 December 2010]

I'm not sure why this film got so little attention or why the heartfelt performance by Stacey Dash went completely unnoticed in this movie. The film was not perfect with a few of the scenes feeling a bit unclear and rushed, but I thought it was a unique story with interesting characters. I liked the way the film not only showed feeling of helplessness one might feel being in trouble and alone in a country that is not your own, but made some strong statements about American culture and how our justice system could care less about the well being of our nation's youth until sex is involved in someway. I thought the acting was superb in this film throughout but I really loved the way Stacey Dash played Minnie showing a street smart young girl that was still vulnerable and sensitive. Not a perfect film, but definitely enjoyable.