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hayleyhillis
Reviews
Upstream Color (2013)
Sleep, Glorious Sleep!
That's right folks. Sleep is a far better option than sitting through this pretentious crap. Aside from the silly, laborious plot, the acting is diabolically self-conscious. 'Upstream Color' screams "try-hard" louder than anything I've seen in decades. It's overtly stylised and contrived. The only thing going for this is the cinematography which, not surprisingly, was credited to someone other than Shane Carruth who wrote, directed, produced, edited, composed, designed, cast and 'starred' in this offering. So maybe if he'd handed over the reins to a select team including writer, director, producer, editor, composer, designer, casting agent, and lead actor, Mr Carruth may have had a better film on his hands 'cos after all, the title's not bad.
If someone you're with insists on watching this, you'd be better amused by cleaning the oven or sorting socks.
Fifty Shades of Grey (2015)
Flippity-flop.
You simply can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear. The book was unquestionably the worst piece of writing I'd ever encountered, so what the hell were they thinking in making this rubbish? Apart from the tedium of the plod (read plot), the script is cobbled together with hollow dialogue, countless use of retch-inducing signifiers and cliché, a complete lack of chemistry between the characters and predictable scenarios and outcomes at every turn. I got the feeling throughout the film that both these actors were desperate to get off the set, go home (but certainly to separate houses), drown their shared humiliation with a stiff drink or ten, and set fire to their contracts. Woeful book. Woeful film. Don't waste your money on this drivel. There are Fifty Reasons to STAY AWAY.
True Detective (2014)
Wonderfully intelligent right up until...
I watched this in one sitting on DVD. The two main characters turned in flawless performances. The complexity and depth of plot and characterization kept me engrossed and riveted right up until the last few minutes whereby it suddenly took a nose-dive into the shallows of mediocrity. There was a moment when it could have ended more powerfully, when the two men are left and awaiting help. (Are they found in time? Do both live? Only one? etc, etc). But OH NO! The final couple of scenes slip into formulaic "happy-ending" mode with Marty having his "Happy Family-moment", and the otherwise intelligent, and philosophical Cohle having his "God-moment". Oh Pu-lease!!!