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nbarlow
Reviews
You Only Live Twice (1967)
The quintessential 60s Bond film
As far as i can recall, this is the only Bond film where a team of ninja abseil into a volcano base, containing a monorail, full of boiler-suited baddies who are launching killer satellites into space. What more could you ask for? What's that? You want to see Sean Connery fighting a sumo wrestler?? You're in luck!! (OK so Roger Moore fights two sumo wrestlers in "The Man with the Golden Gun", but they were much smaller and the rest of the film was rubbish.)
Austin Powers probably owes more to this film than any other, which is no bad thing. "Goldfinger" and "From Russia with Love" are also classics of course, and "Goldeneye" is perhaps a better film, but for sheer Bond-ness this is my favourite.
Kôkaku kidôtai (1995)
Manga at it's very best
I'd heard the Matrix borrowed several elements from this movie - having seen it now i would say that's something of an understatement. Both films are highly stylised action movies that attempt to cram in some philosophy. But while Ghost In The Shell also addresses the main question asked in the Matrix ("what is reality?") it also asks some more interesting questions( "what does it mean to be human? to be alive?"), and though it is occasionally heavy-handed, it is more successful in making you think.
To be brutally honest, most Manga i've seen (with the notable exception of 'Akira') looks kinda cheap due to the somewhat jerky animation. However, though the style of animation is the same here, the artwork is breathtaking - in the evocation of a rain-soaked futuristic city, the choice of camera angles, and the stylised use of light and shadow. The music is also superb, and the sometimes languid pace of the movie feels like a benefit rather than a problem.
As with virtually all movies, watch the non-dubbed version if possible. However, the occasionally clunky translation and second-rate voice acting in the dubbed version can't spoil a classic piece of animation.
Jue quan (1977)
Perfect example of cheesy 70s Kung Fu flick
This really defines a blueprint for this kind of movie: 1) Guy with ridiculous facial hair and/or silly hat wonders through the wilderness,happens upon another guy practicing Kung Fu 2) Brief conversation involving a) a particular technique of one of the silly-haired-guys, b) the number of provinces in which the other silly-haired guy is undefeated 3) Fight, preferably involving some kind of animal-style Kung Fu. 4) Repeat as many times as you can squeeze into a couple of hours.
Throw in a grueling training sequence (though this maybe isn't quite grueling enough in this movie), a bit of betrayal (ideally involving someone killing someone else's master), some slapstick comedy, some bad dubbing (this genre is really the only one where dubbing should be allowed) and there you have it - the perfect Kung Fu movie. I defy anyone not to enjoy it.
The Rock (1996)
The apex of the Bruckheimer action pic
If 'Top Gun' is the film that defined the Bruckheimer formula, 'The Rock' is the movie that uses all the elements to best effect, before things got too out-of-hand (and too loud!) with Armageddon (and don't ask me what happened with Pearl Harbour...). Everything is there - slow-mo shots of people looking heroic, wailing guitars, big explosions, seemingly impossible task.
For an action film, all the main characters are surprisingly well developed, and none of the actors waste the opportunity. Ed Harris is the perfect choice to play the fallen hero baddie, and it was an inspired move to cast Sean Connery as basically an aged James Bond - he seems to enjoy himself too. But the film belongs to Nic Cage, who not only delivers more hilarious lines than i can count, but also comes across as a likable, believable character. The interactions between him and Connery are better than can be found in 99% of 'buddy movies'.
The balance between tension and all-out action is about right, and both are well executed. The chase through San Francisco deserves special mention.
Personally, i marginally prefer 'Top Gun', but that's in a kind of semi-ironic way, since it's so cheesy. The Rock is an action film i'm not ashamed to say i like.
Cradle 2 the Grave (2003)
Li and Dacascos - what a waste
The next time Jet Li and Mark Dacascos work together (and i hope there is a next time), it should be to knock some sense into Jet Li's Hollywood agent, or adviser or whatever. To be in one movie with DMX could be considered unfortunate. Two is sheer stupidity. (Choosing 'The One' over 'Matrix Reloaded' is more like a case of "out of the frying pan into the fire").
This is a bad movie. The cliché-ridden plot lurches from one badly acted scene of hip-hop machismo to the next, pausing only briefly for some unnecessary sentimentality involving the obligatory cute kid. Tom Arnold is as annoying as ever. Anthony Anderson offers occasional comic relief, but is still not as funny as the truly laughable script.
All this might be forgivable if the Dacascos/Li showdown was worthwhile, but this is another big disappointment - the editing is done in the frenetic Hollywood style that doesn't let you see what's going on, and the fight is interspersed with two other pointless fights for no good reason.
I have nothing at all against dumb action movies, no matter how dumb, but this doesn't seem like an actual movie made by professional movie-makers at all, so much as a mess constructed by throwing together lots of elements some 14-year-old fanboy wanted to see in a film together. Watch 'Drive' and 'Fist of Legend' instead.
Dip huet seung hung (1989)
Not bad, but "Desperado" does the stylish gunplay better
I have to say i was a little disappointed with this movie, having expected big things from it. There are some great moments - a few tense standoffs and of course plenty of trademark catching-guns-in-mid-air moments, but all too often they're drowned out by repetitive (and dare i say it, slightly tedious) scenes of innumerable baddies pouring into rooms and being mowed down before they can get a shot off.
A John Woo film is always going to be style-over-substance, and this is no exception - the plot encompasses just about every cliché in the genre. However, Chow Yun Fat delivers a superb performance, creating a character with real emotions under the suave exterior. Sadly, the other leads are not given much room to express themselves.
I did enjoy this film, but i don't think it will do anything to convert non-HK-action junkies to the cause.
Drive (1997)
best straight-to-video action flick ever!
So that might sound like damning with faint praise, but in fact i really like this movie. The fight scenes are easily the best i've seen in a pre-Kill-Bill western movie (and that includes Jet Li and Jackie Chan's Hollywood efforts) - Mark Dacascos is really amazing, the choreography is spectacular, and the editing for once allows us to appreciate it.
That alone would be enough for me to recommend this film, but the bits inbetween are an unexpected pleasure as well. Dacascos is likable enough (though i don't understand why he pulls his trousers up so high) but Hardison steals the show with some great lines. I don't know why he hasn't made it bigger. As for Brittany Murphy, i can't figure out if all that stuff was in the script or if she's making it up as she goes along, but again it's pretty funny.
Overall, a likable, unpretentious film with great action scenes and more than it's share of laughs. Recommended.
Gladiator (2000)
Padded out to make it feel more 'epic'
Gladiator is a long film. Epic films are supposed to be long. But somehow Gladiator doesn't feel like an epic film. Sure, it deals with the rise and fall of a Roman Emperor, has spectacular battle scenes, a nearly spectacular CGI Colosseum, and everyone speaks in the clipped 'BBC English' accent that we all know they used in Roman times, but somehow the story doesn't carry enough weight.
We feel bad for Maximus when he's betrayed, and we hate the villain and want him to get his comeuppance. But we don't give a toss about the Roman people, who are portrayed as a bloodthirsty mob, so why should we want them to be freed from their tyrannical emperor? It works better as a personal revenge tale than as a chapter in the history of the Roman Empire.
The script is weighed down with pretentious and meaningless pronouncements ("Rome is an idea"?) and the plot is too full of coincidences. The action sequences are well executed (if you'll excuse the pun) and none of the actors embarrass themselves, but overall this is an above average film that has ideas above its station.
Starship Troopers (1997)
Cleverer than it first seems. But only just,
So is this just a dumb action movie with wooden acting and virtually no plot, or a clever satire on the militaristic leanings of modern America? Well duh, it's obviously a satire, but not a particularly clever or subtle one. OK so this film predicted quite accurately the administration's approach to current/recent actions in Afghanistan and Iraq, but again, this wasn't rocket science. Maybe Veerhoeven felt he had to ram his point home in order for it to be understood by his target audience, which is presumably teenage boys who enjoy seeing beautiful people shoot at/get eaten by giant CGI bugs. But i don't see this film convincing anyone else.
(However, i have to confess i did find the many gratuitous dismemberments and beheadings quite amusing on some adolescent level.)
Once Upon a Time in Mexico (2003)
Slick and entertaining diversion
This is probably a love-it or hate-it kind of movie. Personally i loved it. Granted it's more a collection of set-pieces and a showcase for a collection of cool/quirky characters than a coherent story, and Salma Hayek is criminally under-used, but i enjoyed every minute of it.
Desperado was obviously a classic, and to be honest i was sceptical about whether bringing more big names on board would actually improve the sequel. But i have to say, Willem Dafoe, Mickey Rourke and Eva Mendes proved me wrong. However, this film really belongs to Jonny Depp, who is in inspired form, and delivers one of the funniest performances i have ever seen.
This isn't a film that will make you think, or that you will even remember much about, but it's definitely a fun way to kill a couple of hours.
GoldenEye (1995)
by far the best Bond film since the 60s
From the fantastic bungee jump in the opening sequence, to Robbie Coltrane trying not to smirk as he identifies the sound of the "Walther P.P.K.", it's obvious that everyone involved in this is having a great time. And that includes the audience.
Brosnan brings the suaveness and wit that was lacking from Timothy Dalton's over-serious approach, and a believability that was even more lacking from the campy Roger Moore efforts. The action sequences (particularly the aforementioned opening sequence, the chase in the middle, and the fight at the end) bring the franchise up to the state of the art, the villain is Bond's equal, and both the girls are as hot as hell.
It's just a shame that they couldn't keep up the momentum in the rest of the Brosnan films, in particular the invisible-car travesty of Die Another Day.
Catwoman (2004)
Not the worst film ever
As the other comment on this site said - don't necessarily believe the critics - it's worth forming your own opinion. This is by no means a good film, but i can think of many worse ways to spend a couple of hours - as far as bad films go, at least this one is in no way pretentious or boring.
OK so it is stupid (since when do cats know how to do kung fu/basketball /breakdancing/whip wielding/running up walls?) and the fight scenes are nothing but a series of incomprehensible fast cuts (presumably this was cheaper than sending Halle Berry on an intensive Kung Fu training course), but the actors and director do a reasonable job, and the film at least looks expensive.
The one thing i really don't understand is who came up with the plot in the first place. What superheroes need is a good super villain. And since comic book movies (particularly comic book movies starring Halle Berry in a revealing leather costume) are presumably mainly aimed at a male audience, who on earth thought that a couple of executives at a cosmetics company would make good bad guys? So the concept of the film was flawed from the start, but in my opinion i don't think that justifies the vitriol this film seems to attract..
The Matrix Revolutions (2003)
another nail in the franchise's coffin
OK, so the matrix was great - there's no doubt about it. The look of the whole film was cutting edge, it presented action scenes the like of which had never been seen before, and the plot - if not as "deep" as some might suggest, was at least coherent, and held the attention for the whole film.
The Matrix reloaded ranks as one of the biggest disappointments in my movie-going life. Not only was it completely unnecessary, it was boring beyond belief and even the (admittedly spectacular) freeway scene couldn't relieve the embarrassment of the "rave" scene and superfluous religious imagery.
The Matrix revolutions may or may not be worse than "reloaded" - it's hard to tell since my expectations were so much lower. What is for certain though, is that it is a bad film. It still takes itself way too seriously, still alternates incongruously between tedious pseudo-philosophising and implausible action sequences that go on so long they themselves become tedious.
And it's so stoopid! - OK so here's the possible spoiler - at the end when Neo makes a deal with the machines, WHY would the machines keep their part of the bargain? They're machines! If they were programmed in the first place with some sense of honour, why weren't they programmed not to want to take over the world?
If you've seen the matrix but not it's sequels - don't! If you have seen the sequels, just try not to associate them with the original - no point in tainting the memory of an outstanding film..