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Reviews
The Order (2019)
Ignore the negative reviews
I was looking for a new show to binge and the trailer caught my eye. I decided to give this a chance despite the negative reviews and I'm glad I did. The world building using current mythology that they created with this series is amazing. Admittedly I'm outside the target demographic for this material but that didn't stop me from enjoying it. Every character from the main protagonist to his allies and the villains are all done remarkably well. There is no black and white here. Every character is in the gray, each with their own motivations and end goals. I really hope we get a second season because the end left such a cliff hanger that I'm clamoring for more. Watch it.
Taken: Off Side (2017)
Ridiculous
As another reviewer said, the first couple episodes were good but then they give us this drivel. The big bad white government man just wants to frame muslims as terrorists so he can continue warring with them. The Quran forbids suicide. Someone should tell all the Islamic terrorists of the world that they've been reading their holy book wrong because they sure do love blowing themselves up. I think my eyes must have completely disappeared inside my head from rolling so hard when I had to listen to that woman talking about how she lives in fear every day. At least the BBC show Bodyguard was not afraid to show Islamic terrorism as it is rather than trying to make a scapegoat white man villain.
Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (2018)
*Sigh*
I was really interested in this show. I liked the original sitcom and I knew they were going in a darker less kid friendly direction with this installment which is perfect for this time of year. I watched the pilot to see what would be in store for me. I'm sorry to say that while the story and atmosphere are engaging, Netflix has once again decided to inject social commentary into another of their shows. Not 30 minutes into episode one we have a black character mentioning how she tried to get a Black Panther club started at their high school and that the "white patriarchy" needed to be taken down. This is met with cheers from our protagonist Sabrina who *ahem* happens to be white. Christ. Is it too much to ask to just have an entertaining show with interesting characters that don't spout left wing talking points, or any political talking points for that matter. That of course is rhetorical because I already know the answer. I guess this is why older shows and movies are better because we could just be entertained without being preached to.
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018)
Not terrible but has problems
I don't know what I was expecting from Fallen Kingdom but it certainly wasn't what I got. I'll start with the good stuff.
The CGI was serviceable. The Endoraptor (Indo?) looked menacing and made for a decent non human antagonist. The rest of the dinos were passable.
Jeff Goldblum's cameo as the beloved Dr. Ian Malcolm while short was nice to see.
The cinematography was gorgeous. I liked the flyover shots of Isla Nublar which were reminiscent of JP1.
The action sequences while kind of rushed and a little illogical were exciting.
Now for the bad. Chris Pratt and BDH seemed like they were sleep walking in this movie. They didn't exude the personality and spirit that they had in Jurassic World. It's like they were just there to collect a check.
The computer nerd and doctor chick were annoying. He was constantly screaming and whining and her SJW attitude was unwelcome and not needed. I was hoping one or both would be eaten shortly after they were introduced.
Rafe Spall as the lead human antogonist didn't work for me. He was cartoony and his overall plan was just ridiculous, and killing a defenseless old man with a pillow? Do we really need to see that in a JP movie? This isn't Goodfellas.
The little girl who turns out to be a clone. Why was this in here? They tell us about it but it doesn't go anywhere. I thought this was a dinosaur movie.
The plan of Spall's character to sell dinos for millions of dollars so they can be used in military applications. Um what? Completely ignoring the logistical nightmare that would pose, how exactly is that better than our current weapons technology? Colin Trevorrow should stick to directing because his writing sucks.
So yeah this film has some good points but overall it's problematic and makes me want to watch JW or JP1 again.
Deadpool 2 (2018)
Deadpool goes full SJW
I loved the first Deadpool movie. It had good action, catchy one liners, and DP's trademark 4th wall breaking. This second outing has all of that too with the addition of Deadpool now being a full blown social justice warrior! Because that's exactly how a badass former special forces operator who is now a mercenary would talk. Calling Cable racist throughout the movie because he asked Dopinder to turn off his music. Saying Black Tom is using cultural appropriation (a hallmark term for SJWs) because he's a white guy using that name. I could go on and on. I admit there were some good pop culture references and lines that gave me a light chuckle but overall DP's left wing schtick got tiresome fast. He is nothing like that in the comics and he was nothing like that in the original movie. If you don't like being hit over the head with propaganda disguised as jokes watch the first one and call it a day.
A Quiet Place (2018)
Good mix of horror and drama
This movie was entertaining with an interesting premise and solid performances by the four leads. Some of these 1 and 2 star reviews are laughable because they nitpick things rather than just sitting back and enjoying a film for an hour and a half. I question if some of these reviewers even watched the whole film given their asinine posts. Did the film have some flaws? Sure, what movie doesn't. Did it deliver on its theme of survival by the main characters not making a sound? Yep. The creature design was done very well and the dynamic of the family was very believable. I especially liked the locations in upstate New York where they filmed as it provided some beautiful landscapes to contrast with the horror that the creatures have wrought upon the world. I, unlike some of these reviewers don't need information spoon fed to me like the origination of the creatures or their motivations. Who cares? All that matters is that they're here wreaking havoc on humanity and they need to be dealt with.
The Domestics (2018)
What a ride
Wow is all I can say. This movie was everything I could want in a post apocalyptic setting. The main characters of Nina and Mark were well cast. The action set pieces and cinematography were executed with attention to detail. I've seen comparisons to The Purge in other reviews but the difference between those films and The Domestics is that the latter doesn't shove political crap down your throat. It's just a straight up action packed thrill ride with our two protags trying to save their marriage and their lives from roaming gangs of psychopaths. I especially liked Lance Reddick's turn as the helpful family man who turns out to be a cannibal. My only gripe is that Kate Bosworth's character occasionally made some dumb moves but I chalk it up to being part of her arc. Overall I highly recommend this film to genre fans and those that want a break from Oscar bait and superhero fare.
Jeepers Creepers 3 (2017)
Terrible
I loved the first two Jeepers Creepers movies. They were suspenseful and fun. This mess however was a total letdown. The plot, what there was of it, was a jumbled incoherent [mess]. The "main character" Addison sleepwalked through the movie. Stan Shaw's character chewed so much scenery that the rest of the actors had no solid ground to stand on, not that it matters since they were apparently given no direction and just stood around looking confused. Meg Foster was about the only decent thing in the movie and that's disappointing since the Creeper is the namesake. This go around he was a complete joke. He wasn't menacing or scary like he was in the first two films. Salva and co completely neutered his character in favor of giving more attention to his truck which is somehow an indestructable tank including tires that can't be pierced by bullets. Go figure. I was really looking forward to seeing Trish again and how they would include her but alas she only gets a small cameo before the credits roll. The CGI was laughably bad, like The Scorpion King with The Rock bad. I kept wondering if The Asylum or The SyFy channel had an uncredited hand in the production of this junk. If you're a fan of this series stick with the first two.
The Nice Guys (2016)
A dud
I'll preface this by saying that I like Crowe and Gosling's other work. This however was not worthy of their efforts. Shane black is normally a good writer but this fell flat for me. I admit that I did laugh a few times but the rest of the time I found myself scratching my head at the nonsensical plot. Nothing really made sense and there was no cohesiveness to any of the scenes. They all just seemed to run together with no sign of editing or pace. The 13 year old daughter was shoehorned into nearly every scene and made the movie almost unbearable given her character's inconsistency in certain scenes. When I watch a movie I require two things; to be entertained and to care about the characters. Both of these criteria were not met. Spend your two hours doing something else folks.
Basic (2003)
the biggest slap in the face to anyone who ever served in the military
When I heard about this movie I had high hopes for it considering it was a story about a covert mission in the jungle involving Army Rangers. I was in the Army as an infantryman when this film came out so naturally I couldn't wait to see it. After my initial viewing of this "movie" I was stunned. As far back as I can recall, every single Hollywodd movie that involved war and the military had a military adviser. This person is there to make sure that everything that is portrayed in the film is accurate. Well I guess the military adviser on this film took a sick day, because there are so many glaring screw ups in this film that I don't know what to think. Anyone who has served in the military, especially the Army, will know what I am talking about. If you have never served and you watched this then you most likely wouldn't notice the inaccuracies. Beyond the poor representation of the military, the movie didn't really make much sense. I wouldn't recommend this to anyone.