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Nancy_Morgan
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Candyman (2021)
Ignore the Review Bombing
The negative reviews are brimming with white boomers foaming at the mouths, cosplaying oppression and crying out that they're the victim. Just ignore their nonsense. This film is fantastic, it tactfully deals with the white saviourism of the first film, gives Candyman a decent backstory/motive and ties it up in a neat bow. The nods to current politic issues are important and necessary.
You (2018)
Disturbing, but not for the reasons you would expect
I found 'You' an incredible slog to get through. It was dull but also what was most disturbing to me was how much it minimises Joe's psychotic behaviour. Joe is a maniac, stalker, murderer, yet the series seems to deliberately normalise his behaviour. It seems to attempt to manipulate the audience to believe he is the hero. Very frightening indeed that 'You' is so revered, I fear the repercussions of this suggestive show.
Occupants (2015)
Ridiculous Premise
The idea of accessing another dimension is interesting but the premise of this film is utterly absurd. To compound this, the acting is wooden and the reactions are nonsensical. If you were to find your video cameras were picking up on an alternate reality I'm pretty sure you would react a bit more extremely than "well that's a bit strange". I love decent low budget independent films, but this was awful. Sorry guys, you should have taken the idea of accessing an alternate reality and gone in a different direction than this. Also it is not necessary to show the camera's on screen menu ("REC", audio wave, battery power etc) in the footage as well as digitally adding lines to the footage to try to prove that it's a type of "found footage" film. Since when, nowadays, do you see this in the final footage in even what is considered "home movies"?
Jupiter Ascending (2015)
Shallow, boring, a complete waste of money.
Jupiter Ascending, a film that deals with subjects that I'm sure a millennia old advanced species would have no interest in, such as wealth, materialism, physical appearances and girl crushes. A totally shallow film with not a single redeeming feature. The Wachowskis should be ashamed of themselves. It was a good job we had a gift certificate because if we had spent the full £20 on the film I would have been mortified. I walked out before the end of the film as I didn't care the slightest about the fate of any of the characters and it was pretty obvious that the ending would be a complete happy ending cliché. These sorts of films make me want to give up on the modern film industry, they only spew out high budget garbage to appease the idiots. Excuse me while I go watch some Hitchcock or something. Urgh.
Margaret (2011)
Coming of Age Movie That Never Comes of Age
I unfortunately subjected myself to the full 3 hour cut of this film. An apparent coming of age movie following the subsequent aftermath of a death by RTA inadvertently caused by self involved teen Lisa (Paquin).
Lisa is out shopping for a cowboy hat due to the shallow motive of looking the part for a horse riding trip with her absent father. Being unsuccessful, she notices a bus driver wearing the exact accessory she is seeking. She then frantically chases after the bus, waving emphatically, asking the bus driver where he got his fine hat. The driver allows himself to be distracted, drives through a red light and ends up dismembering a pedestrian with his bus. Lisa stays with the woman whilst she bleeds out and eventually passes on. The film then depicts Lisa's "inner turmoil" she experiences after the incident, albeit, poorly.
This film is the epitome of bad script writing, it severely lacks character development and only partially redeems itself with some cinematography, which is all undone by unusual and disjointed film editing.
Is these sorts of scenarios one expects someone who is the indirect cause of another's death to go through some sort of self realisation. This did not occur. Lisa did not express an appropriate level of guilt. Neither did she go off the rails, partake in any self-deprecation or seek forgiveness. She did not apologise and there was no genuine admittance of guilt until the end. Her guilt was not evident in her behaviour throughout the film but instead in a few childish outbursts.
I took an immediate dislike to Lisa, she was bratty, self involved and immature yet strangely in possession of quite an advanced dialogue. The character interaction was unusual, especially when involving the character Emily who's dialogue was nonsensical and executed poorly. Maybe this is the way New Yorkers interact, I'm British so what do I know?
Nearly every character in this film was easily provoked, I feel the film was mostly taken up by needless arguments. I felt no empathy towards any of the characters and at a push the only character I felt any affinity with was Ramon (Jean Reno) who was inexplicably killed off. Which in my opinion is a lazy way to remove a character from the story.
As affirmed by Lisa's own statement, the film lacked any genuine emotion or sense of connection between characters. Everyone seemed to be in desperate need of a new moral compass.
After the incident Lisa does not recoil into herself like any genuine human being would but instead becomes an incredible annoyance to any unfortunate soul forced to interact with her. Lisa's arrogant comparison between herself and Monica's daughter is laughable, and the scene where she gushes over Mr Aaron (Damon) is revolting as she seems incapable of any restraint. I found myself vocally cringing throughout.
David's insight on Shakespeare was refreshing and the only part that was remotely interesting.
The sub plot to this film as depicted between Ramon and Joan/ Lisa and Mr Aaron is if you pester a love interest (who has no interest) enough then they will surely become submissive. I'm not sure that is something that should be driven home.
I was surprised this film had such big names. In summary I felt this film was an utter failure but it contains some political viewpoints that indicate why it may have been pushed to success in America. The only genuine part of the film was when Lisa reunites with her mother over a medium of entertainment they previously disliked but eventually see the beauty in.
Silent Hill: Revelation (2012)
Had Potential, Very Poorly Executed
Let me start by saying I did enjoy the first Silent Hill movie. I can allow myself to enjoy horror films, even with a certain degree of cheese. The first film retained the chilling atmosphere projected in the games. It also had good monster design and a reasonable plot. To be frank, I feel a sequel was totally unnecessary.
Firstly, the film contained some very bad acting. I'm wondering what the need was for so many British actors, some newcomer American actors and actresses could have matched the performances in this film. It says a lot about a director when established actors such as Sean Bean and Malcolm McDowell do such a terrible job. Plus, the incredibly brief screen time given to Erin Pitt is possible some of the worst acting I have ever seen.
Secondly the relationships established within the short amount of time this film spans are totally unrealistic and ridiculous. For example, Vincent and Sharon. After Vincent's quick and unreserved acceptance of Sharon's f***ed up situation, we learn of Vincent's background. He's part of the crazy religious cult that started this mess in the first place, and has been indoctrinated all his life to believe Sharon is evil. We are supposed to accept that suddenly this fundamentalists throws his beliefs to the wind because he got a funny feeling in his groin area? Now, we all know what religious extremists are like, you're going to have a pretty hard time of convincing them of any logic. I'm sorry, but I can only suspend my disbelief so much.
Cut to the mannequin scene, which was unsuccessful in building any suspense, we are faced with the Mannequin Monster. Now, this is bad monster design. I was severely disappointed, I've seen better CGI on Buffy. Obviously, I have to cut it some slack considering the movies budget was less than half of the originals.
Once we've been assaulted by some more terrible acting they introduce the "SEAL OF METATRON" (Hahahaha) which once handed to Claudia reveals her true nature, which is apparently a big-titted, corset clad, blade wielding monster. This monster is soon to face a gratuitous battle to the death with Pyramid Head, who isn't half as scary as last time ( last time he flayed someone alive!) This film just feels like a tacky, gimmicky take on the first one.
Lastly we are suppose to accept that after years of Sharon's Dad protecting her, and after rushing to Silent Hill to save him after being warned many a time not to, she is perfectly happy for her Dad to stay there to find her Mother. So Sharon and Vincent skip happily off, forgetting about the horrendous nightmares that have tortured their entire existence.
So to summarise, to watch this film would be a total waste of your time, and the effort I put into warning you not to watch it. But if you are a bit like Sharon and like to ignore warnings, don't say I didn't...warn...you.
If only Sharon had known all along that all she required to beat Alessa was a nice big cuddle. D'awww.