marqymarqy Reviews

The Avengers (1961–1969)

Oh yes, oh very definitely yes

[10/10 · 18 September 2012]

Barring The Prisoner, Star Trek (with Kirk and Spock) and Thunderbirds, The Avengers is the best 1960s TV series going - you can have hours of fun pretending to be John Steed by bellowing "MRS PEEL" at everybody in your life knowing that few of them will know what you mean - but will laugh anyway. Note the opening credits of the Emma Peel Colour series (1967), where Steed (Patrick Macnee)wobbles while standing on one leg proferring his furled umbrella. Some of the stories here have not been screened in the UK since 2001 - and then only on Granada Plus where they were edited down from original run times of 50 minutes to 46 to accommodate ever longer advert and trailer breaks; and in the case of the final episodes of the Tara King series (1968-9) this amounted to the removal of the tag scene which closed every episode. Thusly, volumes 7 & 8 of the Tara King series have been known to achieve ridiculously high prices in Ebay auctions - these being the episodes most rarely screened in their entirety - Channel 4 ran them in full in late summer 1997 in an early Friday evening slot. Some may choose to source their Avengers fix by buying the much better priced Dutch DVD releases (re-titled "Der Wrekers") but with the confusion that they sequenced their discs with a different running order to the UK issues. Oddly, even these do not follow the exact order in which the stories were originally transmitted or filmed (Dave Rogers' exquisite books The Avengers (1983) and The Ultimate Avengers (1995)tell you everything you need to know about this) Let's hope the whole set from Ian Hendry's one remaining 1961 videotaped episode ("The Frighteners") to Joanna Lumley's miniskirt marvel "Emily" from 1977 are all given re-releases on DVD at prices lower than you'd expect to pay for an thoroughbred Ferrari or an undiscovered Titian – which happily they now have. But what price would be paid to that enterprising and either exceptionally wealthy or well connected (pun intended) person who owns original video recordings of those 1961 episodes that ITV hadn't got room for in their apparently tiny vaults? Dream again - and dream harder,sweet cousins.

The Home-Made Car (1963)

Cars and girls still matter

[17 September 2012]

Imagine my joy when purchasing the DVD/Blu-Ray release of the film Lunch Hour to find this cult classic gem included as a bonus feature – the obvious link is that both have the same director – James Hill – (not, presumably, the beardwonderful former television football pundit). The availability of Lunch Hour on Blu-Ray baffled me – but the inclusion of The Home- Made Car and two other early and equally rare James Hill colour films, Skyhook and Giuseppina, made this release make sense. The Home Made Car is about a young, mechanically minded car enthusiast who buys a scrap bull-nosed Morris from a junk yard at an exorbitant price and proceeds to restore it to concours standard in the unbelievable comfort of his home garage with the bare minimum of tools in less than 28 minutes; (imagine Wheeler Dealers but with a little less bullshit), limited knowledge; the distraction of the girl next door (Penelope Mortimer, in a selection of delightful flared skirts and dresses, including a gorgeous pleated skirt and heels, setting off for work at, conveniently, and far too parochially, the office of the local BP garage); her kid sister who is a dead shot with a water pistol, and, crucially, the assistance of the proprietor of same local BP filling station – a skilled mechanic, blacksmith and artisan. I say crucially because the film was commissioned by British Petroleum (aka Bullshit Promotions) to promote their image globally (that's why nobody speaks a word in this film). What it actually ended up becoming was a "trade test transmission" used by the BBC to promote the advent of colour television transmissions; and it was screened as such on countless occasions until its final transmission ((as legend would appear to have it) on 23rd August 1973)). Technically, that argument falls flat, because colour, and our perception of it, is subjective not objective – hence its replacement with what we now know and has entered into yet more legend as "Test Card F" (we should not let our imaginations run riot too extensively on what the "F" stood for) – an attractive pre-pubescent girl engaged in what must surely be a fruitless game of noughts and crosses with a potentially psychopathically frightening stuffed toy surrounded by a selection of numbers and geometric lines and five shades of grey presumably intended to assist knob-twiddlers in their twiddling to made medeiaval colour tellies perform to the best of their limited abilities. This film thus entered the landscape of legend - helped by the fact that the BBC never announced beforehand when the film was to be shown – one therefore had to sit in front of a TV set tuned to BBC2 for hours on end (during the daytime, when you should be either at WORK or at SCHOOL) (thus ensuring a bond between the potential viewer and this film's hero) and hope this one got shown. Thusly, I don't think I ever saw it from beginning to end. Recordings of this film were rarer than rocking horse urine – I mean – who - apart from Bob Monkhouse and Bob Crane - owned a video recorder in 1973? Needless to say our hero wins his babe – her former beau failing the "door service" test (although being in possession of the far more valuable and much prettier car – an Austin Healey 3000). Watch this film and marvel at the street our hero lives on – it's wider than the Heathrow to M4 section of the M25, but with considerably fewer parked cars (three, as I recall) and only the errant rag and bone gentleman with his hayburner and cart to constitute "traffic". My only quibble with this film is why hasn't our hero got to get up in the morning and go to work like everyone else and can spend hours working on his car? If he is unemployed and receiving benefits, then his exploits, however noble or industrious, should not be celebrated or glamourized, let alone allow him to become the cult star of a hitherto unobtainable movie. We can only hope that, at the conclusion, our hero, his work on his car completed, may now join the rest of the majority of the human race in a mundane and underpaid job for which he will receive the minimum reward for the maximum labour, but, as we must surely deduce, he cannot be anything other than a newly qualified school teacher: we can tell that on his first day of term his fantastic car will be parked alongside the headmaster's Jaguar Mk 2 and the games teacher's Austin A30 and that these will be the only vehicles in the school's massive car park. We also know that when he addresses his first class the little sister of next door's big girlfriend will be sitting in the middle of the back row smirking at him - this film really is that good – and really that good at foretelling the future.

The Boy in the Plastic Bubble (1976 TV Movie)

Don't pay more than a couple of quid

[5/10 · 16 September 2012]

I last saw this film on TV around 1980 - I think it was shown to cash in on Travolta's success in Saturday Night Fever and Grease - to the best of my knowledge it hasn't been shown since. I was surprised and pleased to find it readily available to buy on DVD (and VHS),and although the picture quality is poor compared to modern standards it's worth every penny of the 1.77 GBP I paid for my copy. It looks like a video tape that's been copied three or four times - or could it be the film maker's use of humour ? - Robert Reed (the Brady Bunch; Rich Man Poor Man; Scruples) as Travolta's dad begins the film looking as though suffering from a severe case of sunburn; two thirds in John tells him he's looking pale and needs to get some sun. Reed returns from his holiday looking as if he's done a shift in a flour factory. Travolta plays a lad with no inbuilt immunities and has to live in the plastic bubble of the title. He is soon attracted to the pretty girl next door (Glynis O'Connor)and it is she who literally and figuratively brings him out of his shell. Travolta claims he doesn't smell even though he can't wash, and how lavatory hygiene is managed is not dealt with satisfactorily. This is an old fashioned feel good movie suitable for anyone who likes John Travolta or doesn't mind a large dose of sentimentality. Travolta covered Paul Williams' end theme song What Would They Say on his 1977 album - subsequently re-issued including two of his songs from Grease to cash in on his success. Recommended - but don't pay more than a few quid.

Bangkok Hilton (1989)

Nicole Kidman- Actress Before Star

[10/10 · 15 September 2012]

This couldn't be better - witness Denholm - Never Less - Than - Brilliant - Elliott at his usual best as a super top quality English boozer on a mission to get sober and sort his daughter's problems simultaneously - also Hugo Weaving as the best oily lawyer you'd want on your case and Nicole when she was an actress rather than a superstar or Mrs Tom Cruise or former Mrs Tom Cruise. When cute, asthmatic and incredibly wealthy Kat Stanton (Kidman) journeys to London on a genealogical quest she never imagines that the charming young man who beds her(Jerome Ehlers)will tuck several kilos of best quality heroin in the camera case he so kindly bought her. Needless to say it's discovered by an exceptionally clever airport dog with a penchant for class A drugs, and Ms Kidman is soon having a cosy chat with two rather grumpy policemen. This is where her troubles begin ....... she's in Thailand - where dope pushers face a mandatory death sentence - administered by a handsome young gent with a machine gun ! This film's got everything – including (like in Eastenders) a comedy ethnic postman. Purchase, watch, enjoy!

The Sweeney (1975–1978)

Marvellous Old Series

[15 September 2012]

Jack Regan tells various members of the criminal community they are nicked and selected colleagues to "shut it" in this magnificent series which re-wrote the rules of cops and robbers TV drama. Until The Sweeney, scenes involving dialogue between actors travelling in cars employed dodgy back projection which was very noticeable. The Sweeney had a cameraman in the car with the cast while the car is actually being driven. The depiction of violence here was controversial - the thumping Thaw gives Eric Mason in series one closing episode Abduction is particularly brutal - is it justified because he had kidnapped Regan's daughter - we the audience are the judges! Many people cite this series for wrecking numerous Jaguar Mkll saloons - in fact it is an S Type - and there is only one which gets smashed up over and over again ! Bad Apple from series 3 is especially good - with Norman Jones and John Lyons playing corrupt but very effective cops. The closing chase sequence where Thaw and Jones meet at last has scenes filmed at Chertsey lock - into which this correspondent had the misfortune to fall during a Thames boating holiday in 1972! Messenger of the Gods has the taxi driver from Eastenders (Derek Martin)promising that the sexually active young gentleman who "grassed" him (Malcolm McFee, of Please Sir fame) has "earnt 'isself a slappin' " On The Run includes the immortal line where Regan tells a superior that he and Carter (Dennis Waterman) are "working like one armed paperhangers"; and its prequel Taste of Fear features a magnificent portrayal of a new recruit (Norman Eshley) who isn't cut out for life in The Sweeney. Morecambe and Wise appear in Hearts And Minds, much to the amusement of Thaw and Waterman. Witness the end credits where Harry South's reflective theme is matched to evocative black and white stills of John Thaw, Dennis Waterman and Garfield Morgan, who straddle these adventures like colossuses. Watch and enjoy.

Inspector Morse (1987–2000)

"Buy me a drink, Lewis"

[15 September 2012]

Possibly the most stunning TV series ever produced, Inspector Morse stands head and shoulders above everything else. Buy the DVD set and don't rely on mid afternoon re-runs which are edited by up to 7 minutes from their original runtime and will have any of the remotely violent or unpleasant bits also edited out to be consistent with a tea time slot. Hard to believe John Thaw could improve on his portrayal of Jack Regan in The Sweeney - but he does so - if an actor ever created two works of unparallelled fineness surely it is he. Ably assisted in all but one of the 33 stories by Kevin Whately who also equals his other masterful portrayal in Auf Wiedersehen, Pet, this series features a countless stream of the best of British character actors and complex, original yarns from writer Colin Dexter. Thaw's face off with Barry Foster in The Last Enemy is a filmic masterpiece - who is the taller ? - but this moment is surpassed by the reaction of one of his witness's little sister when Thaw asks her if she would like an ice cream. Perry Fenwick of Eastenders fame began his hanging around in pubs screen life here - memorably addressing a defeated snooker adversary as "tosser" in Last Bus To Woodstock. This box set should be snapped up at your earliest opportunity.

Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow (1963)

Another Sophia stockings and suspenders masterpiece

[15 September 2012]

As this film has not been on telly in the UK since about 1974 I took advantage of the offer to buy a DVD reissue from America at a reasonable price. What I got looked like what I'd have got if I could have videod that 1974 transmission with suitably antiquated equipment - but worse - much, much worse.

There are three short stories here - all starring Sophia Loren and Marcello Mastroianni - top Italian stars of 1963, where and when this film was made.

Story one has Sophia as a mother who finds she can evade a heavy fine for selling illegal cigarettes provided she is pregnant or has a child under 6 months old. Cue much baby-making. An amusing comment on Catholicism, sex and the law.

For those like me who love to see Sophia in stocking and suspenders, the striptease episode is a great disappointment because of the poor picture quality – or maybe it's because I'm much much older than I was in 1974!

Recommended - but maybe wait for a better quality print to become available.

Boccaccio '70 (1962)

Great film should be on TV often

[13 September 2012]

Boccaccio 70 always struck me as a great title for a film - perhaps because it wasn't afraid of its built in obsolescence. It hasn't been on UK telly since around 1974 - can someone – anyone - please, please, please explain this curious phenomenon to me. What we have here is four short films from four top Italian directors of the time (the time actually being 1961 - another hilarious aspect of the title) including Federico Fellini and Luchino Visconti. The picture quality is superb and may even be mastered from the original negative. The first film of the four is the stand out for me - the director paints a hilarious yet hideous view of the popularist theory of 1961 - population explosion. The scene at the swimming pool really must be seen to be believed - and be seen in colour on the largest screen you can access - the director anticipated High Definition by half a century. The dialogue is Italian with English subtitles. Well worth a look - even though it'll take you 3 hours and 23 minutes to watch the whole film. The release I bought is by umbongo films.

Live Now - Pay Later (1962)

Underrated Actors In An Undiscovered Classic

[10 September 2012]

Ian Hendry stars as Albert Argyll, a door to door salesman with the gift of the gab – not only able to sell goods that people don't need to people who don't need them on hire purchase – but also bed every woman, married or unmarried, who makes his acquaintance. Do we envy him – well no, not really – because he can't sustain the one relationship he would most like to: that with steady girlfriend Treasure (June Ritchie). June Ritchie is one of those sad assets of film – a page three girl born thirty years too soon - (alternatively, was The Sun's page three 30 years too late?) June appears here topless in her morning bathtub in the squat she shares with boyfriend Hendry – a steamy scene because of the hot water which should have been steamier but couldn't be as the result would have been hot water for the distributors – let's not forget this old corker of a film came out in 1962. A good sub-plot involves the magnificent Geoffrey Keen – an actor so good he's totally believable in any role - be it sympathetic, hardnosed or irascible – and wife Liz Fraser (what price to have seen her topless?) in a horrific marriage of inconvenience played out for her financial security and his social kudos ending in her panic induced death. John Gregson's over indulgent toupee rather lets the side down. Watch this film and witness guilt-free chain smoking – from a time when it was still a pastime not a life threatening habit – but just think – only 11 years after this film was released all UK cigarette packets would carry health warnings. It's almost impossible this has never been released on VHS or DVD. It was last broadcast in 1996 on Channel 4 in the UK

Psyche 59 (1964)

Four characters battle for supremacy and survival

[10/10 · 9 September 2012]

I don't remember when I first saw this film – possibly around 1973 or 4 when probably shown late on a Friday night – I'm sure it was shown more than once – after that it disappeared from our screens and, to the best of my knowledge, has never been shown on UK television since – this rarity value ensured its legendary status, at least in my own mind if not the annals of film history. Patricia Neal plays Alison Crawford, a woman who has convinced herself she's blind – a blindness not only psychosomatic but also metaphorical as she no doubt wishes she was blind to her husband Eric's (Curt Jurgens) adulterous ambitions towards her younger sister Robin (Samantha Eggar) who is engaged to Paul (Ian Bannen). The story revolves around the psychological power play between Jurgens and Bannen and the relationships between these four main characters. Part of the drama is meant to occur in France – but when a taxi is summoned a Vauxhall Cresta PA in right hand drive on British number plates turns up. Better viewing then for car enthusiasts than seekers of realism. Of the actors and the acting, Patricia Neal never slipped below best form, and she makes a striking appearance here looking like a corpse in Ray-Bans. Samantha Eggar is nowhere near as good as she is in the following year's Return From The Ashes, but still not bad in an unsympathetic and shallow role. Ian Bannen is marvellous – witness him in The Hill (also 1964) and The Offence (1972) – you always know he's going to come off second best, but he does a grand job of getting there. Curt Jurgens is in pre comedy-high-ranking Nazi officer mode that he would perfect in time for Soft Beds, Hard Battles (1974) The background music can be intrusive at times: almost as if a small string section had been sat down in front of a tape recorder, had the film rolled for them and told to play whatever seemed appropriate. At one point they all stop playing, as though they realize something serious or dramatic is about to happen. It reminds me a bit of that silly plink plonk background music in Desperate Housewives that you only notice when it stops – the difference is DH is meant to be funny whereas '59 is meant to be serious – or is it? This film has now been released on region 1 disc in America, but if your DVD player won't play region 1 discs I can supply a superb quality region free disc – but without any artwork. Contact me by Email at [e-mail] or text on 07949 792498.

Connecting Rooms (1970)

Superb actors in a great film

[8/10 · 7 September 2012]

Given the superstars appearing here it's hard to understand why this film has not been released on DVD - are artistes allowed to veto such releases as I understand they are with proposed television screenings? The film was last broadcast in 1995 or 6 as part of ITV's "Nightscreen" strand and I had the presence of mind to VHS it as it is a favourite of mine. Alexis Kanner as "Mickey Hollister" lets his incredible sideburns do the acting - as he did in the film Crossplot and as "the kid" in The Prisoner episode Living In Harmony - and they almost steal the show from Bette Davis - who is amazing - almost impossible to believe you are watching the same actress who made All About Eve (1950) and Whatever Happened To Baby Jane (1962). Michael Redgrave is also excellent value - you can almost smell his filthy old raincoat. Also appearing here as a topless model is the delightful Gabrielle Drake as Kanner's unfortunate girlfriend - dumped as you know she will be when she tells Mickey she is pregnant. All told then, this film's a good one - not slow but measured - containing elements both predictable and unpredictable, and deserving to be witnessed by a larger audience. I am able to supply DVDs. My Email address is [e-mail] or text me on 07949 792 498