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KatieBakedBeanz
The films YOU hate, I love. The films I hate, I still kinda love.
(they've got to be really very bad/cheesy/cringeworthy for me to say that though)
XD
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An error has ocurred. Please try againFilms are in chronological order.
Reviews
Hunderby (2012)
So so so so so so so so so so so so underrated
I cannot state how much I enjoyed both series at the time. I recently dug the dvd out of my dvd chest and rewatched it and was in tears laughing at Julia Davis' almost psychopathic and devious characters.
Hester is a character I can't help but love. Absolutely hilarious.
Please watch this as - well, I know it's too late at this point - let me dream!!!
But a FULL second series would be a fine and glorious thing (there are only two episodes... Maybe there were only ever meant to be two episodes...)
I can't help but hate how many of Julia's shows get cut down in their prime. It makes me sad. And she makes me very very very happy!!
Saltburn (2023)
Watched this because of the potential - it drains you ..
I initially added this to my watchlist because
1. Richard W Grant
2. Reece Shearsmith
Immediately thought posh comedy hijinks akin to Julia Davis' amazing and alas short-lived "Bad Sugar".
(I know that's not a good reason to watch but the potential I saw was there).
Got round to watching it and (I know this is very mean ) and saw everyone (else's) favourite Barry Keough in it as the main character. Oooohhh no it's not a comedy, it's a drama with a silent dy.
Yes he's intense, Yes he can act, but he has zero charisma. Nothing that can keep me entertained or keep watching. He seems like he'd suck the fun out of everything in real life and his plasticine face just irks me too.
Jacob Elordi on the other hand seems very comfortable in his role.. almost like he isn't acting and seems incredibly posh. As someone else has mentioned this does seem to be "posh propaganda".
Farleigh might be the only relatable character in this but his character isnt relatable because he's awful.
As to the story - it's soooooo old hat I had to keep reminding myself that this was released in 2023. Brideshead and the talented Mr Ripley are as close in their DNA to this that rather than being twins, they're actually clones.
Will not be watching this again.
The Bad Guys (2022)
Unfortunately too predictable for my 8 year old
Bought this as it came up as a recommendation after watching "Puss in Boots: the last wish" and to go from that 10/10 to this is, in a word, Ooof
That being said we (my family and I) tried to give it the benefit of the doubt but unfortunately we predicted the ending within about 15 mins.
The voice acting is good with the exception of Richard Ayoade who I normally love. He's soooo out of place here and his inability to even try to act like anyone but himself is just horrible in this.
The animation is good but there was a cheapness to it. (Not sure how else to describe it.)
The gist of this review though isnt that I didn't enjoy it. I'm an adult. This is a kids movie. It's that my 7 year old was bored throughout and predicted everything before it happened. It makes it difficult to continue viewing it.
Don't think we'll be watching it again. Should have just rented it. Buying was £5.99. Renting was £4. Felt like I was getting a good deal. You live and learn.
Puss in Boots: The Last Wish (2022)
Wow wow wow - had my whole family on the edge of our seats
I figured I'd rent this for a fun weekday family movie. Hadn't read any reviews just hopped into it
We were not expecting it to be that.
My kids 13 & 8 were immediately enamoured with it and the story left nothing wanting for me and their dad whatsoever.
#TeamFriendship 100%
Death is legitimately one of the scariest characters in a kids movie, possibly ever. When puss has his hairs stand up, I think mine did too.
Damn that wolf creepy.
My 8 year old was laughing, crying, hiding, and full of adrenaline. My 13 year old (who normally is THE most difficult to entertain) was laughing at everything.
What a fantastic movie.
And that's not even mentioning the amazing animation that's been applied here..
The only ONLY reason that this is a 9 and not a 10 is because I feel like we needed more Death.
I would also say probably not one for smaller kids.
Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021)
My 7 year old got bored and turned it off
I've literally just put this movie on. My son (and I) love the original, there's so much heart in it. It's like the perfect blend of cheesy, cringe and bad but it's still completely coherent and cute.
The new one is
Meh.
Thats all that can be said about it. Meh.
Its already reading like an after school special.
I personally don't care about the WB verse (my son plays multiversus which is basically the same thing)..if disney can self insert why can't wb?
The problem is that this movie is entirely sacharine and dullllllllllll. The kids acting is ok. LeBron is serviceable - nothing on MJ.
My son was like "what the hell is this".. got up and turned it off to put "Garfield 2: a tale of two kitties" on.
It's that boring.
The Bet (2016)
OK so it's DEFINITELY better than it looks but it's still pretty dumb
So - I am happily surprised that I enjoyed this. I put it on for background whilst I am at work and actually spent the majority of the time not working but laughing.
For SURE it is dumb as all hell, the plot makes little to no sense and I guess it's a little cheesey - but it is a fun movie. I've been watching a lot of "so bad it's good" movies recently so I am hoping I'm not immune to them but I really don't think so with this.
Like, they went out of their way to make a funny and well made movie. It's really a shame that I can't buy it on dvd otherwise I'd buy it right now. (I think it's US only...)
Also - the soundtrack to this movie is FIRE and HILARIOUS!
I cannot find anything about the artists on Spotify though, so thats a bummer. I even looked up the record company and cannot find it.
So in summation:
This is a dumb sex movie. Nothing is PC in it because why would it be?? - you're literally being told what to expect by DUMB SEX ROMP movie... (fwiw - I am a 35 year old woman)
But it is a passable/good dumb sex romp movie. Laughed out loud a lot for this.
The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023)
This is not what I expected and I expected it to be bad
What even is the point of this movie.
Luigi who is my child's favourite character is nothing but a hostage. They could have done so so much with him. Mario is boring.
Bowser who should be scary...isnt
This movie is most definitely for 4 and under and unfortunately fans of the mario series will be very unhappy.
I laughed, well chuckled maybe twice, (at Luma being a goth kid from South Park) but that was it. There was no emotional journey. There was nothing unexpected in this. Mario defeats bowser but absolutely nothing of worth happens.
Would consider getting my money back if I could, and I haven't ever done that before...
Not even for Norbit.
We Have Always Lived in the Castle (2018)
If you like the book you will not like this film.
So I watched this tonight because I was bored. Maybe I should watch it again when I'm not bored but as a fan of the book, which is hauntingly brilliant. I am legit so annoyed by this film.
They made it because they could but I honestly don't believe the director or the producers (or even the actors) truly knew what they were dealing with.
It's meant to be tense at the very least but it kind of felt like; scene, scene, scene, scene. Let's move this plot along people!
I enjoy Taissa Farmiga but Merricat was all wrong here. She is disturbed certainly, but her tics (the movements she chose to do) felt completely out of place. It was the wrong way to go with this character.
For example; in the book, everyone in the town is very wary of Merricat and thinks that she, and her family are weirdos,(Which to be fair to the town, they are) but the movie goes out of its way to show just how strange she is by adding a fun quirk!
On a film like this you shouldn't have to make the character do "weird" things to get this point across. It should be clear enough anyway. Taissa is normally great in scary movies but because this wasn't even spoopy it just fell flat for me.
Alexandria Daddario felt completely out of place for me as Constance. You are meant to feel pity/empathy for her (well I always have in the book - for taking the fall for what your sister did. Constantly worn down by people. Constantly chasing her uncle and Merricat around. Afraid to do anything wrong. Just constant anxiousness and worrying about the household and cleanliness. Constance always had weight behind her character.) and it just feels like in this she's just there to move the story along. I didn't feel anything for her character other than "oh she's on the screen again".
Crispin Glover (whom I love) felt completely underutilised with this role (understatement for the entire film) and it's just sad to see him involved in this.
And Sebastian Stan...
Hmm...
"10/10 Sebastian was great!"
**I am saying this AS A FAN OF HIS.**
**This is not how movie reviews are meant to work people!!**.
Almost all of the 10/10 reviews of this movie mention him. He isn't great in this. He just isn't, and the movies isn't great just because he is in it. It is okay to call out bad acting and bad movies. If you only lump praise on people, well you get movies like this. If you can't see that this is a bad movie because you are blinded by your thirstiness, go outside.
This was not a good film because he looked cute in it.
His character who is domineering and powerful and scary in the book, is just ...meh. literal embodiment of meh.
I felt nothing for his character. I felt no tension. It feels like the producers said "Sebastian's cute. Alexandria's cute, let's get them to star in this gothic horror, it'll be greaaaaaaat!:.
Honestly what odds are there for Merricat to come up against here with this version of Charles? He played Charles as: *obvious bad guy* with alterior motives from the begining.
-I kind of wish they had made him wear a long thin mustache so that he could twirl it. That would have at least been hammy enough to keep me mildly entertained.-
Sebastian also looks LEGIT bored the entire time he is on screen which kindof (REALLY) pulls you out of the film and this, sadly, is already a boring, forgetable film that could've been great if it had had the right people who cared enough to make a great film, rather than just a film, behind it.
Not surprised they pushed this one out hoping no-one would have noticed.
Honestly don't think i'll watch this again.
Everyone please do give the book a read though! It's not particularly long and it is super atmospheric, spooky and very thought-provoking. Everything this movie should have been but isn't.
2/10
Love Island (2015)
Cancel this show 4 suicides caused either by it or over it.
Do the right thing itv. Cancel this show.
1. It is boring
2. It is terrible for people to watch both for their self-esteem and for their future love lives.
3. 4 people (cast/crew) have commited suicide.
Don't F**k with Cats: Hunting an Internet Killer (2019)
You will watch the whole damn thing. DO NOT WATCH IF YOU LIKE ANIMALS. 9/10
So, like others here it seems I thought this was another netflix original spoof comedy thing that I would disregard, but, and I know this is cheesey, with the swear word in the title it just piqued my childish interest. I then read a very basic synopsis about it saw "kitten suffocation" and noped the eff out of it for a couple of days.
...
Then I came to my senses, realised I was an adult and read the parental guide here on Imdb and decided to take the risk.
This definitely is NOT for the faint of heart though. There are some unutterably disturbing images in this despite them not being fully shown. (They are talked about in extreme depth and there is a lot of build up (you see a cat being doused with a flammable liquid and a cat tied to a broom stick before being drowned in the bath, and then cutting away from the inevitability of it all.)
Luka Magnotta is a truly, truly sick individual and I am glad he will never see freedom again). I don't think that mentioning his name now is giving him attention. He can't read this. He can't feed on this. The only attention he hopefully gets is from the other prisoners, although hopefully he is in solitary confinement where he is entirely alone.
As a cat (and animal) lover this film will haunt me and I will have all of the cats faces etched into my memory forever. Why they had to show as much as they did hurts my heart. I understand why but yeah, this is a very very tough one to sit through.
It is hard to not be biased towards this like you can in "making a murderer" because he is just so blatently guilty, unlikeable and sick. This is clear cut from the beginning.
You see Jun Lin in his final sad moments too, so completely vulnerable but thankfully you do not see the murder, just the swinging of a blade. I do think, like with the cat videos, we see (without seeing) a bit too much of the murder video. I thankfully never saw the viral video when it came out and I truly wish I could forget what I saw in this, even that very small amount. Humans can be so ugly.
This documentary was really incredibly intriguing. I watched all of the episodes in one sitting. Why they split it into three when it easily could have just been a feature length movie I'll never know. You will not be able to turn it off.
The documentary is well made. Harrowing. Compelling and traumatic. It looks at what makes a vain, egomaniacal fame hungry person do the thing they did. It turns it back on us the veiwer saying might we have helped to cause this. Of course the answer is no.
And I'm glad the majority of people who watch this will come out of it hating Luka more than they did before, if they even knew of him before.
I like Deanna and John. I kind of think that maybe they should have been a bit more reticent to do this though just because of the casino tape that Deanna received. She had the perfect alias and could have just sat in a blacked out room. What do I know, I'm just an idiot on the internet.
They try with the mother to make Luka look a bit human but she just is the final jigsaw piece in all of this; she either allowed him to manipulate her from birth and continue to do it through adulthood not just to her and family but everyone or she is just as crazy as he is. It is sad that she can't see him for what he is. A murderer. It's like she's sick he got caught, not for what he did.
**Reaction and Questions**
-How frustrating that the police didn't listen to the group.
-How frustrating that the police actually make no acknowledgement of the group in this documentary.
-How naive was Lukas mother to his manipulation. There is/was no Manny. I believe that the third hand was taken after the snake had eaten the kitten, perhaps someone completely unaware of what had just happened or Perhaps Luka HAD met someone with the same, and i dont like to use this word in the context of animal cruelty but, fetishes and just was there for that particular video.
I do not believe there was a Manny. Luka concocted him after watching Basic Instinct a few too many times.
-I sincerely, sincerely hope that Luka's mother watches this documentary.
1. To see how she was played (in Luka's early manifesto on disappearing, he said to cut all ties, he had no feelings towards this woman. He had no feelings towards anyone or anything.)
2. To see exactly what he did. I don't think that she thinks he did anything that bad to the cats. Like, you're damn right lady animal rights people are going nuts at him, he didn't just feed them the wrong type of food.
-What happened with the Sun newspaper guy??
Did he not follow up this super weird guy that he just interviewed secretly. Like, i know sun journalists are bad but this would have been the scoop of the decade. He seemed to just leave it there because Luka was done talking.