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Dash (2022)
That was torture
This is definitely one of the most obnoxious and nerve-wracking films I've ever watched. I don't know what annoyed me more. This guy driving around making painful faces throughout the film. Or the fact that there's people out there buying smack thinking it's cocaine. This guy must be one of the biggest morons on the face of the planet. Literally everything bad that happens could of been easily avoided. As if the writer of the film expected the viewers to be as dumb as the driver. I honestly couldn't wait for it to end. This isn't a film I'd recommend unless you'd like to induce and aneurysm. Generous 4 stars.
Infinity Pool (2023)
Overrated and obnoxious
This film totally misses it's mark. It tries so hard to be bizarre and abstract but ends up being pretentious and annyoing. I honestly have no idea why people like this film. I could barely get through it and honestly couldn't wait for it end. I normally like Mia Goth films but this one didn't do it for me. She was super cringe in this. Especially in the scene where she's riding on the front of the car. Her screeching voice almost made my head explode. How this film has a rating above six stars is beyond me. This is definitely not a film I'd recommend or torture myself by sitting through again. 4 stars.
You People (2023)
Better then expected
After watching the trailer I thought this was going to be a total flop. Nevertheless, because I haven't seen Jonah Hill in anything since he turned into a surfing hippie, I wanted to give it a shot. Surprisingly it was better then I expected. Nothing to write home about but still better then expected. I found myself laughing out loud throughout the film. If a film can actually make me laugh it can't be that bad. On the downside there was definitely tons of cringing moments. All of the racial undertones were hard to sit thought. I also though these people actually dating in real life is a just a little far fetched. Either way it's still a decent film.
All Eyes (2022)
Waste of time
After reading the premise I decided to give the trailer a shot. It looked like an easy watch so I figured why not. The first five minute were tacky but I decided to stick it out. Once the Don character is introduced things started to look a little more promising. Then out of nowhere, he's accidentally killed by one of his own booby traps. The movie goes straight down the toilet from that point on. For the remainder of the film, the lead (Allen) is ducking and dodging a bunch of low grade Home Alone type booby traps. At that point I couldn't wait for it to end. The lead character couldn't carry the film by himself. Killing off Don ruined the film. To top it off we never really get to see the monster. 4 stars.
Bones and All (2022)
Overrated
I can understand why people like this film, but it definitely wasn't for me. I was really expecting it to be a lot better then it was. I thought it was extremely boring. If you have trouble sleeping or you're low on melatonin. Put this movie on, it will knock you right out. I honestly couldn't wait for it to end. The only parts worth watching were the scenes with the Sully character. Everything else felt extraordinarily slow and drawn out. I honestly thought the trailer was better then the actual film. I will say the cinematography was great, but other then that this isn't a film I'd recommend or watch again. Basic stars.
Troll (2022)
Disappointing
I've always been a fan of giant monster films. When I found out Netflix was releasing a movie about a giant troll, I couldnt wait for it to come out. But unfortunately, when it was all said and done, other then The CGI it was a disappointing film with a sad ending. Long story short, during the Christianization of Norway the trolls family was ambushed and murdered. He's then ripped from his home and imprisoned deep inside a cave. After many years an explosion free's the troll. Now the Norwegian government decides they gotta take him out. After a number of failed attempts, they finally realize the only way to kill him is with direct sunlight. Which made so sense because the troll was walking around during the daytime for most of the film. In the end, the troll finally makes it home. But it's too late, the morning sun comes up and turns the troll into stone. Sad ending. Other then the CGI it's not a film I'd recommend. Generous 6 stars.
Terrifier 2 (2022)
Overrated
That was way too long. It got to the point where enough was enough. After about an hour I couldn't wait for it to end. Art The Clown looks great and there's some gnarly kill scenes, but that's literally it. The acting's terrible and there's almost zero storyline. All this film consists of is a killer clown running around slaughtering people. Why people are so into these films is beyond me. Don't get me wrong! I enjoy horror films just as much as the next guy, but some of these kill scenes are extremely overdone. You gotta be somewhat sadistic to be into this stuff. When it was all said and done it's just an all around cheesy film. 5 stars.
God's Country (2022)
Terrible
After reading the premise and watching the trailer, I decided to give this film a shot. Bad idea! This film is complete garabage. I know a lot of people like to use the term "one of the worst movies ever" but I really mean it. That statement is totally acceptable when it comes to this film. It was a total waste of time. When it was all said and done I had no idea what I had just watched. I liked the idea of the film, but the way it played out was pointless. The events that took place could of been easily avoided. But most of all, there's a good 45 minutes where nothing happens. The lead character just kinda mopes around feeling sorry for herself. It was torture getting through that. The film starts to pick up a little in the last 15 minutes. But it doesn't save the film from being any good. Do yourself a favor and watch something else. 3 stars.
Halloween Ends (2022)
Possibly the worst finale in the history of cinema
The series finale would of been a lot better if it ended with Jamie Lee Curtis getting her head ripped off. They try to make her out to look like this total badass, but in actuality, she's an unlikable grumpy old women. As far as the movie goes, I don't understand why they made a finale with one of the most iconic characters in film history about someone else. Other then the scene at the doctors house, Myers doesn't leave the sewer till the very end of the film. It was more about the Corey character and how he turns into a psychopath. It's upsetting they ended the saga the way they did. Killing off Micheal Myers and not Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) was what everyone expected but not what everyone wanted. 5 stars.
God's Creatures (2022)
Nothing happens
If A24 wasn't behind this film I doubt I would of checked it out. I like a lot of their films but this was a waste of time. It had the elements to be great, but unfortunately it missed the mark. It starts out ok and there's an erie vibe throughout the film. But when it was all said and done, nothing happens. It had a few good scenes here and there and the score helps carry the film. But it was missing any sort of intensity. The only reason I would suggest watching this film is if you can't sleep. It was like visual melatonin. Other then that, it's not a film I'd recommend or watch again. Don't make the mistake I made and be fooled by the A24 logo, watch something else. Basic 5 stars.
Monsters (2022)
Disturbing but good
This is definitely the best portrayal of Jeffery Dahmer I've seen. Evan Peter's was great in this. Eat your heart out Jeremey Renner. No pun intended. It's about time someone made a mini-series about Dahmer's life. Mostly because this psychopaths story is way too intricate to squeeze into a two hour film. The 2002 Jeremy Renner film was terrible and the 2017 film My Friend Dahmer didn't do the story much justice. This show gets into much more detail. I had no idea his mother was on tons of psychological medication while she was pregnant. Or that she was a suicidal UFO nut. I never knew he spent time in Germany as a US Army combat medic. A lot of the events that took place were news to me. I'm glad I decided to check this show out. It's definitely worth a watch. 8 stars.
Speak No Evil (2022)
Stupid people making stupid decisions
Here's an idea! How about not driving your family to the middle of nowhere so you can stay with strangers you hardly know. I can't understand why so many people are praising this film, It's definitely overrated. It's basically just a movie about stupid people making stupid decisions over and over again. Especially the ending. It probably would of been a good idea to let your wife know you just found a dead kid laying face down in a jacuzzi. And what was up with the parents not making a run for it? These people didn't have guns. They were literally armed with rocks. They could of easily gotten away. I didn't get it. 5 stars.
Emily the Criminal (2022)
Good Film
I didn't need to watch the trailer, once I realized Aubrey Plaza was playing a serious roll, I was sold. It was good to see her in something other then a raunchy romcom/dark comedy. She was great in this. She's come along way from her days on Parks and Recreation. As far as the film goes, I thought it had a worthy storyline, and strong supporting actor. I just didn't understand why it ended with her teaching credit card fraud in another country. That didn't really end well for her Youcef and almost got her killed. I guess the answers in the title. Either way it's still a good film. Check it out if you get a chance. 6 stars.
End of the Road (2022)
Terrible
The trailer fooled me. It looked like a decent film so I decided to give it a shot. Bad idea! This movie sucked, total waste of time. I had no idea it was going to be a film where the narrative is all white people are racist rednecks. I should have known how it was going to play out the second Ludacris jumped out of the lowrider wearing a Black Lives Matter jersey. I feel bad for any children that watch this and think all white people are like this. And what was the point of this film? What was the moral of the story? Because in the end, after all they went through, the family keeps the dirty money. If they were going to do that, they should of just ran with the money in the first place. It would of saved them a whole lot of trouble. Definitely not a film I'd recommend. 3 stars.
Low Life (2022)
Obnoxious
The lead character almost gave me an anxiety attack. Maybe that was the point. I just found him to be very nerve-racking and obnoxious. The movie itself was hard to get through. About 30 minutes in I almost turned it off but decided to stick it out. That was a bad idea because nothing of any real significance happends until the last 20 minutes. It felt like that card game scene went on forever. It was torture getting through that. On the positive side, I will say I liked the ending. It got pretty intense there for a second, but it would of been nice to see what happened with the main character. 4 stars.
Easter Sunday (2022)
That was torture
What possed me to actually sit down and watch this is beyond me. I really regret putting myself through that. I couldn't wait for it to end. I should of turned it off the second Joe started doing stand-up at the church. This film is extremely corny. No way someone actually rated it a 10. And who left the reviews "Out of this world" & Can't stop laughing" .. YA RIGHT! .. Who paid them to say that? Looks like Joe made his family members make IMDB pages. This is definitely not a film I'd recommend or watch again. Don't make the mistake I made and watch something else. Stick to stand-up Joe. 4 stars.
Vengeance (2022)
Very conflicting reviews
It seems like most of the people leaving reviews either really like this film or they hate it. Really no in-between. Speaking for myself, I liked the storyline, cast and most importantly the ending. Because let's be honest here, who doesn't wanna watch Ashton Kutcher get brutally murdered. Although, it's not a film I'd watch again, but it is something I'd recommend checking out. 6 stars.
Orphan: First Kill (2022)
GO ESTHER!
I did not expect this film to be as good as it was. It's definetly a worthy prequel. The last 30 minutes was intense and had me on the edge of my seat. If you're a fan of the first film, you really need to check this out. 7 stars.
Beavis and Butt-Head (2022)
Hilarious
These new episodes are awesome. Mike Judge still has it. The episode where the YouTuber whispers into the camera & makes sounds with Crayola markers had me dying. I haven't laughed that hard in a while. Don't sleep on these new episodes. They're hysterical.
Elvis (2022)
Totally Overrated
For the first two hours it felt like I was watching the longest music video of all time. It was all over the place and extremely rushed. And what was up with the soundtrack? Why the hell was there a Backstreet Boys song in the film? Not to mention the Hip Hop? I didn't get it. This film was hard to get through and I couldn't take Austin Butler serious. I was glad when it was over. I guess if you're a fan of Elvis give it a shot. If not, pass on it, it's nothing special. Basic 5 star film.
I Love My Dad (2022)
FUN FILM
It's hard to believe this is based on a true story. Apparently this really happened to director/star of film. I'm not exactly sure how much of it is true, but it's still a crazy story either way. I recommend checking it out. 7 stars.
Trainwreck: Woodstock '99 (2022)
ARE YOU READY!
Loved it! That was great. I knew Woodstock 99 was crazy but I had no idea how out of control it got. Good times. Wish i was there. This documentary is definitely worth checking out. 8 stars.
Keep Breathing (2022)
Screw all the flashbacks
Unfortunately 70% of the series is all flashback scenes. Which is a total rip off. The trailer leads you to believe the show is about a girl struggling to survive alone in the woods. When in fact the show was more about her past. That ruined it for me. Not a show I'd recommend. Basic 5 stars for me..
Resurrection (2022)
So Stupid
It started out ok but around the 40 minute mark the film goes straight downhill. When the film was all said and done, I had no idea what I just watched. Especially that ending, WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ABOUT?..so dumb..Whatever the point or message was went right over my head. This is definitely not a film I'd recommend.
Not Okay (2022)
What was the point?
I obviously get the whole don't use a terrorist attack to gain fame thing. But was the point of the film? In the end Danni gets canceled and turns into a depressed drunk. No redemption, no moral to the story. Whatever message this film was trying to send went right over my head. 5 stars.