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Bloodhound Gang: The Bad Touch (1999)
Perfectly Ridiculous
In my humble opinion "The Bad Touch" is the most famous goofy song and this music video is the perfect parallel. The lyrics are intentionally 'bad', but that's what makes the song so epic. It's stupid, but ridiculously catchy. You listen to it once and a week later you hear your mind go "You and me baby..." it's prolific. Watching the video of monkey men wandering around doing weird things, I thought, it's perfect. What else would you want these weirdos doing? I don't even want to imagine. They cement their oddity of a song in history by making just an odd of a music video that only the lucky may one day find.
Into the Blue (2005)
Couldn't decide what to be
This movie couldn't decide what it wanted to be, treasure hunting, drug smuggling, love, sharks. I mean take your pick it was all there in bits and pieces. The acting was actually not that bad, for the most part, but the characters had no depth and little chemistry. There were just too many almost laughable plot twists that it was hard to take the movie seriously. The ending action scene was well coordinated but again but felt almost out of place. Overall not a terrible movie, Paul Walker is too cute, and the ocean scenery was beautiful. I would say worth the first watch but I don't think I'll ever tune in again.
The Four Seasons (1981)
not very funny
With the two leads being such comedic powerhouses I was expecting this movie to be a lot funnier. There were a few decent chuckles but on the whole not overtly comedic. The cast had chemistry especially amongst the couples, they certainly gave off the feel of being married for a long time. The premise was interesting and I definitely felt like I wanted to keep watching. Until, wham, it just ended. I don't know what I was expecting really but it certainly wasn't a sudden cut to credits. Though a decent enough movie I don't need feel the need to ever watch again and I'm not sure I would recommend.
Madonna Feat. Justin Timberlake & Timbaland: 4 Minutes (2008)
its 4:06
One of the many things that bothers me on this planet is that the song 4 minutes is actually 4 minutes and six seconds. Like, why? Tell me there is no way to shave six seconds off this song, a shorter intro, quicker cut off? It feels almost like it was done on purpose just to infuriate us detail oriented people. Off all the ridiculous things in this world, this is one small thorn in my side. Otherwise the music video itself is fairly well produced and the theme feels spot on. Though its easily dated by Justin Timberlake's scarf/ascot, back in the day they were cool but now he just looks a bit ridiculous.
Eminem feat. Rihanna: Love the Way You Lie (2010)
That's on toxic
The chokehold this song had on the masses was unbelievable, for the first time it was like being toxic was being celebrated. So many of us singing along had absolutely no idea what a toxic relationship even was (good for us) but we still absolutely jammed out. This video perfectly summarizes the subject of the song and does a great job of making the viewer kind of feel bad for loving the song so much. I like to think at least one person watching hadn't properly understood what the song was about and got the shock of a lifetime... okay probably not the shock of a lifetime but at least a mild surprise.
American Conspiracy: The Octopus Murders (2024)
A lot of speculation, no substance
This doc series had a great start, delving into the suspicious death of an investigative journalist who was knee deep in government conspiracies. Unfortunately, it never goes any deeper. Documenters force you to watch countless minutes of news flashbacks pertaining to a myriad of different scandals but never draw conclusions or make new discoveries. The two 'journalists' simply come to the same conclusions that their predecessor did but have just as little proof. There are far too many people involved and far too many events dragged in for a person to come out on the other end of this doc remembering even one shred of it all.
The Truth About Jim (2024)
Wildly Speculative
I would not call this documentary true crime but instead reality tv. A family documents their attempts to pin infamous murders on their late grandfather (who doesn't even have a criminal record) with no proof other than that he was a bad guy. It's obvious that Jim is not a good person, but that a serial killer does not make. The links are tenuous at best and commentary from all family members is wildly speculative. The documenter cannot provide any conclusion due to this lack of evidence and so it makes you wonder why you're watching at all. A hard pass for any true crime or good tv fan, this is just opinions.
They Called Him Mostly Harmless (2024)
Not the sleuths
I cannot with these internet sleuths, they are ridiculous, sitting at their computers, harassing real people and only thinly doing good things. Then they try to lay claim to discoveries that they are loosely connected to uncovering. Centering a documentary around these people gives them notoriety that they simply do not deserve. The story itself is interesting if you're willing to weed through the self-centered commentary by the sleuths and focus on the mystery. The ending is pretty good, but mostly goes to show how off kilter many of the tangents the "facebook group" took were, just doing too much.
The Greatest Night in Pop (2024)
Awesome doc!
Loved this doc for the nostalgia and amazing behind the scenes look at the making of we are the world. As a fan of the song, and having limited knowledge of how it was made, I was in awe by how the song was conceptualized and how the singers were rounded up. The documentary itself was well made, with an easy flow and the focus kept on the main message. It was cool that they got a few of the artists to participate in the interviews, seeing them at this age and in the 80s really drove home how long it's been. Not only is We are the world an awesome song, but its unusual origin makes it all the more special.
Deep Fear (2023)
Bad
Not even a good bad shark movie, just a bad movie. The acting was non existent and the dialogue was short and choppy with no flow or purpose. While the basis of the plot was conceptually good, it was squandered by a bad script and poor production. Cinematically, the film didn't look too bad, clear picture and decent shark CGI. Unfortunately good looks don't make for a good movie on their own, there would actually have to be some substance... to anything. No action whatsoever, no acting from the cast, and no purpose, so there is literally no point to this movie. My advice to the potential watcher, avoid at all costs.
Where Murder Lies: The Girl in the Lockbox (2021)
Not the amateur sleuths
I was fairly into this episode right up until they introduced the internet sleuths. Listen closely to what they say, they dont actually solve anything or add to the case, they just speculate wildly about things they know nothing about. In fact, this entire episode is filled with people loosely connected to the case expressing their opinions. The true crime aspect of this episode lasts for about ten minutes and the rest of the time is speculation. Giving a platform to these so called detectives is a mistake, they don't solve crimes and their obsessions borderline unhealthy, bringing them on as 'experts' is bad documentary making.
Good Grief (2023)
Underwhelming
Definitely fits into the underwhelming category based on the well known writing capability of Dan Levy. I liked the concept, but don't think it delivered. The opening segment was anticlimactic and didn't illicit the expected empathy, it was almost like "okay... now what". And the now what, was three self obsessed people pretending to be friends and having mostly meaningless conversations. The characters were all for the most part unlikeable, and therefore it didn't matter to me if they got "happy endings" and dealt with their hangups. Overall, okay, no depth to characters or story. I feel no need to ever watch again.
Love Has Won: Episode #1.2 (2023)
What even
I didn't think it could be possible, but this second episode was even more bizarre and ridiculous than the first. This group of people are the most drugged out, idiotic, bunch of imbeciles I have ever had the misfortune of watching. They delude themselves into thinking they are doing drugs for good reasons and that their alcoholic leader is in the process of ascending to a state of higher being... and that somehow Robin Williams is involved. Its almost hard to watch, but like a train wreck I couldn't look away. At no point could I guess what idiocy would come out of these groupies mouths, almost unbelievable.
Love Has Won: Episode #1.1 (2023)
Bizzare
This takes the cake as one of the most bizarre things I have ever seen in my life. These people are certifiable. I don't even know where to begin with the unbelievable beliefs of this collective group of whacked out psuedo hippies. They almost defy stereotypes, which I guess is one of their aims. They preach on ascension and yet they rely on capitalism to fund their drug habits. The producers do a good job of letting these people just go on about themselves and what weird theories they have about life, it was dumbfounding, how do these people find each other? Nothing will prepare you for that first scene, unbelievable.
The Devil on Trial (2023)
Decent
About the best word I can think of to describe this documentary is "Decent". A very expected back and forth between those that believe in the possession and those who think it's all a hoax. The drawback of course being that there is no proof either way so the entire documentary is opinions. Good diversity in those being interviewed and the producers stayed unbiased and seemed to give everyone time to explain their side. The end was definitely a bit of a shock, I was not expecting the behind the scenes reveal. As a fan of the modern portrayals of the Warrens, it was interesting to see an inside take.
Friday the 13th (2009)
Back to Camp
After everything Jason has been through and everywhere he's been, I find it a bit unlikely that he just went back to camp crystal lake to prey on teens again. He's been to space for heavens sake! That aside, the writers took a few too many liberties in setting the scene, such as adding a background character with no explanation and a character who's seemingly spent his whole life in the area, being that he has a hunting lodge, but doesn't know a thing about the legend. Not to mention every single character was annoying, stupid, and absolutely useless in time of crisis. Not even a good bad, just bad.
Ghost Adventures: Cecil Hotel (2021)
Ridiculous
This episode was so bad that I actually turned the television off. Most of the "evidence" was nothing but the hunters acting psycho symptomatic; saying that they were compelled to do bad things and feeling cold chills. While this is pretty typical of all ghost adventures, this seemed over-sold with theatrics. The spirit boxes and pucks are nothing but electronics spitting out words, the input could be literally coming from anywhere. As for the so called psychics, their outputs couldn't be tied to anything real. Then the commercial break "re-enactments" were overproduced and in place solely because the team uncovered nothing substantial.
B.O.B feat. Taylor Swift: Both of Us (2012)
Is that Taylor Swift?!
I give this song full credit for making me a TSwift fan, I was holding off and then I heard the rift and the rhythm and I thought "Well damn, maybe she's not so bad". So, I've got to give this song some major credits. As far as the music video goes, it's pretty basic. Not much thought went into the intermediate clips, but I commend the fact that both B. O. B and Taylor appear in a few scenes together. It belies that both artists cared enough about the song to take the time to put together some scenes to support it's video. It's kind of fun to watch in retrospect, just because Taylor has been launched into superstardom.
B.O.B Feat. Hayley Williams: Airplanes (2010)
It was a different time
I know you're grandparents are always throwing that "it was a different time" line in your face, but in all honesty - being a teen in the 2010's was something else. The best example I have is cryptically putting the lyrics to "Airplanes" on my Facebook timeline to get my best friend to realize I was mad at her. All that teen drama aside, this is a great song and features two artists who had it going on at the time. The video is pretty basic and definitely could have been better based on the popularity of the song. I digress, its a good song and at least they got both singers to participate in the video.
G-Eazy & Halsey: Him & I (2017)
Love/Hate
For some reason I have a Love/Hate for this music video for the simple fact that I'm watching in the aftermath. For all you newcomers, here's the facts, G-Eazy and Halsey were going steady for a while ( a while being in Hollywood standards) and then all the sudden came the rumors and the breakup. There's an epic video of them performing this song live and the pure hatred coming from Halsey is palpable. So, it puts the candid camera style of this video into a weird genre. It feels real, in that they are all over eachother, but as a viewer I also know that it was all a lie at the time. Unfortunate, but still a good song.
G-Eazy x Bebe Rexha: Me, Myself & I (2015)
Noooo
I was so totally vibing with this video for the first three minutes, already gave this video a great rating and then happed the unfortunate mid-video stop of music. This ruins the playability of the video, meaning the average person wont add the video to their playlist, it's not endlessly playable. It stops the flow of the viewer, and is solely for the maker. Otherwise its a pretty good video, the production value is high and both singers are involved int the video, though obviously separately. The break throws off the flow and breaks any trance that the vibe and subject may have gotten the viewer going in.
Ariana Grande: One Last Time (2015)
One... Last... Time
A sleeper Ariana song, it doesn't get the credit it deserves, and this video perfectly preys on the fear that lies on all of us. The song conveys a lover who lost her beloved and pleads for just one more night to cling on to the image of what their relationship could have been. But then the video takes you to a place that no one ever wants to go, the end of the world... all you have is a few moments with the person you love, what do you do? What do you say? Do you accept your fate or do you fight? It's such a simple concept and yet such a devastating reality. That's why I love this so much... like, wow.
The All-American Rejects: Gives You Hell (2008)
Swapped
Take note music video makes for generations to come, this is how you do a swapped persona music video. It has absolutely nothing to do with the song itself, it uses new technology (blended/green screen), and it pits the ego with the alter-ego. My favorite part of the video/song is the "wake up every evening" because it almost makes you do a doubletake but is quite simply spelled out in the video. The song and video pair quite well because its a light hearted approach to a breakup, and the video makes you kind of root for a breakup. All's well that end's well and I'm fighting for my life to finish this review.
Sum 41: In Too Deep (2001)
Perfect
At first glace, in the year 2023, this music video may look absolutely ridiculous...but you've got to take yourself back to the year 2001. The world is a bit different, social media is limited to myspace and punk rock bands have an image to uphold. That imagine includes baggy clothes, spiky hair, and a disregard for the mainstream. In this case, a disregard for the idea that a music video needs to be anything other than fun. Well this video is pure fun, a rigged diving competition with the band being goofy and unruly. Also for all you newbies, an abandoned swimming pool was the epitome of cool in the early 2000s, you can thank Tony Hawk for that one.
30 Seconds to Mars: The Kill (Bury Me) (2006)
Shining... the light on weird music videos
Obviously the band decided to make a music video that paid respects to the Shining and on that front they excelled. It's got a decent production value, the sets feel authentic and there are a number of extra's. I feel like they tried to make too many cerebral references in too short a time, which left the audience (well me...) a bit confused. However, a casual viewer would probably enjoy the video just fine. They do make one vital flaw in my opinion, cutting up the music to insert dialogue, this makes it virtually unwatchable for the music lover. I'll also add that I was one of those people who thought the lyrics were "Marry me" so I was also a bit disappointed by the tone.