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john-l-land
Reviews
Doctor Who: Dinosaurs on a Spaceship (2012)
Absolute Fun
Seriously, if you rate this episode less than a 10, you're a bloody moron. This is a gloriously ridiculously fun episode.
Lavalantula (2015)
I totally ripped off the first part of this review!!!
A made for TV shlock by Syfy about giant lava spiders. You know what you're in for and you get exactly what you expect.
Steve Guttenberg (yes, he's still alive! He was unfrozen from the 80's) is an ex-famous actor, that somehow keeps getting into the TV news every 10 minutes. He encounters giant lava spiders, bad actors and terrible script and has to face them all - will he succeed?
Yes it's bad... but it's supposed to be. It's a glorious train-wreck that you just can't turn away from. And believe you me, there's worse movies in this genre... But I digress. If you want Jurassic Park, this ain't it. If you want to laugh at ginormous spiders spitting fire at folks... then this is your movie. There's an awesome scene reminiscent of the first Alien movie partway through...
Anyway Watch and enjoy!
Hawaii Five-0: E 'Imi pono (2015)
Confused
Usually I love Five-0... In this case I find it hard to believe that the villain was ever a general in an ultra-violent African army...
The guy's somewhere between 100 and 120 pounds, and has a perpetual confused look on his face. He's 30 at the time of filming... So at the time he was supposedly leading troops and kidnapping children to fill his army, he was at most in his late 20's. So he would have been a scrawny kid... I'm sorry I can't wrap my brains around it. It's like "What if one of Fat Albert's friends was an evil African General and terrorist." Even when the guy (during the episode) was spraying Steve & Gang with automatic weapons fire... I was like, "He's barely bigger than that gun!"
I dunno... Very confused. Can I just skip this one?
(At least Jerry managed to earn serious cred by flirting with Max's assistant...)