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Loong Boonmee raleuk chat (2010)
Awful! The director should be executed for being atrociously bad
I firmly hold the belief that those who extol the virtues of this film often lack a robust education in cinema, easily swayed by European institutions attempting to engage with Asian filmmaking without genuine comprehension of its value. Apichatpong's acclaim, in my view, is more attributable to chance than to genuine talent. As a filmmaker and a Thai citizen deeply immersed in our cultural, political, and cinematic heritage, I find it profoundly disheartening to witness such recognition bestowed upon a film lacking in fundamental aspects such as art direction, cinematography, directing, and editing.
"Uncle Boonmee" is a cinematic venture that, in time, may face critical reassessment by more discerning audiences for its dearth of artistic, technical, political, and religious depth. Its narrative offers scant substance, akin to observing a river flow aimlessly for two hours, appealing solely to those who embrace vacuity and philosophical ambiguity. The film's accolades, including top honors at Cannes and recognition for cinematography at various festivals, are almost nauseating, prompting one to question the integrity of the cinematic realm.
The protracted, nonsensical sequences serve only to squander viewers' time and precious cinematic real estate. The film's opening scene, featuring a buffalo tied to a tree, breaking free, lacks relevance to the overarching narrative. The inclusion of the "big foot" character comes across as amateurish, indicative of a director lacking in creative depth, yet strangely embraced by audiences. Furthermore, the ghostly apparition of a woman is poorly executed, failing to integrate seamlessly into the film's fabric.
The cinematography falls so far below par that it would evoke tears from cinematographers worldwide, witnessing such a disservice to the art of storytelling and lighting. Simply put, this movie falters at every turn. Save yourself the disappointment and avoid this woeful piece of cinema.
The Darker the Lake (2022)
Awful. Pathetic. Worthless piece of movie, if we call it that
The first 10 seconds of the first opening scene convinces me this movie is going to be awful. The acting of the two female actors are beyond atrocious! Where did they go to acting school? Who did they have sex with to land in this B- movie (F literally speaking)?
The director is so incapable of telling a story, coupled with the writers who seem to be graduating from Devry university film program are all indicators that this horrendous movie has nothing substantial to offer, except to show how some rich but stupid studio spend time useless days wasting viewers' times to fill the void in their lives.
AVOID it at all cost.
Goats (2012)
A no substance movie, a reflection of the director and writer.
If you are what you eat, this movie is also a reflection of how mindless and numb skulled the director and the writer are. First, as a book, this movie has nothing to offer to anyone but a handful of oxygen wasting Gen Z. There is nothing much intellectual to talk about this banal movie, the nude David D's scene could not help this worthless crap movie. The main actor is kid of cute, but that's the extent of what he offers throughout the movie. Each character has nothing deep to relate to, and the story stays on the surface without digging deep into the soul or meaningful moments about life and its complexity. To sum it up, this movie is just another waste of hollywood space (if we call it movie). It will just be a waste of money, time, and an indication that movie makers sometimes are just rich but brainless people whose leisure is to waste money for personal entertainment and nothing to offer to the world outside of its bubble head. I wont go as far as saying that avoid this movie, but if u are so bored and restless and sleeping pills wont do it for u, then watch this movie, maybe it will help u fall asleep fast enough.
Somewhere Only We Know (2018)
Stupid in all angles. DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME.
ALERT. PLEASE DON'T WATCH THIS RANCID FILM!!
Let's start with this director/writer should never be allowed to do anything else film wise. She/he/they/it is absolutely terrible! Why spending money and time to lure in producers and investors just to show them how bad you are as a writer and director.
BAD ACTING! BAD PLOT! SLOW AS SNAILS! BAD SOUND AND EDITING.
The list goes on and on. I have on clue why we need this junk to litter the film world. The director should be forced to flip burgers at McDonalds until their days come.
There is nothing good I can mention at all, except the cinematography in the beginning is decent and nice. But after 3 minutes in, I realized it's going to be hell to watch. The clue is when the guy pours liquor in the glass, and stops and then does it again. It's against alcoholic nature. They never stop and hesitates to do it.
After that scene, I get more angry and angry watching it.
The Pope's Exorcist (2023)
Pathetic movie that should be sued for wasting my time
One of the worst movies about exorcism. Don't know which is worst, this one or the exorcist believer. With all the money that they have to spend and the years of watching the original, these pathetic fools till cannot come up with better script. The directors are equally bum skulled and have no clue how to tell a story. The whole thing about this movie is vile, pathetic and unbelievable. The cast are all wrong. The possessed boy looks like a whimpy girl whose acting ability is worse than my parrot mimicking my dog's barking. Awful to the max. The script is poor written. Russell Crow must be super desperate and needed money badly to be in such horrid movie. His acting is so pretentious and awful that I thought he needs to go back to acting school all over again.
I am so glad i watched it for free, otherwise I would have sued everyone in the film.
The Light Between Oceans (2016)
Superb movie
This little known movie is cinematically gorgeous and the story is equally poignant with strong cast. I have never heard of it until 2023. But boy, I find this movie to be so movie and poetic. A seemingly simple story that is emotionally effective and tear-jerking. This movie shows many dilemmas of life, the struggles and the moral compass one has to get back on track. This kind of movies require attention when watching as it's not a fast-paced story. It's narratively building the characters and draw viewers in slowly and effectively. The characters show hearts and what it is like to handle tragedies and to overcome heartache, secrets, pain, and to deal with consequences to make their conscious clear.
I enjoy it very much.
Cryptid (2022)
Atrocious movie, awful plot, hideous acting.
The opening scene shows the film's plot and the less than incapable director and its overall quality in less than 2 minutes. Can't stand the stupid story where the redneck out at night in a pouring rain decides to stop the road at night and stays investigate for what seems like eternity. This kind of movie is what a 5 year old director would not even dare to do. The acting in beyond vile, robotic, no emotions. Wonder who would be so stupid to throw the money to these fools to do. Pathetic at best.
The cinematographer is alright but it overshadowed by the most stupid script, the director, and the church level actors.
Regret tremendously the 10 mins i waste on this numb skulled movie.
Everything Everywhere All at Once (2022)
Migraine induced movie
Let's start by clarifying this. Those who give 8-10 stars are either morons who are easily brainwashed by media hype, or are paid to write glowing reviews. I am a filmmaker and I am very critical when analyzing movies with little biases and prejudices. Being Asian myself, I am more than willing to champion good Asian movies that are worth praises. BUT this movie ain't it. It's one of the worst movies I have ever watched. And I could not bare myself to finish it. Incoherent plot and mediocre actings; little character development. Bad editing! Little to no substance! There are more worthy movies that are being ignored. All quiet on the water front, which deserves more praise and awards, but got overlooked. Maverick is more entertaining by many miles. It's a hot mess from the beginning to the end. I got migraine watching it while trying to understand its reasoning and the plot. There are better movies that have the same messages about kindness and understanding out there but of course the academy was already bought and determined to give this all the awards it could fake and come up with. My advice is stay away from it, unless its free and you feel the need to torture yourself. This is movie should be a punishment by the court to all criminals, cause I am sure they would never want to commit any more crimes if the sentence is having to watch this garbage!
I sincerely hope the academy will pull its head out of its ass and start being real and objective in finding the best movie out there to consider for the awards. Either that or shut it down. Maybe Elon Mush should buy it and destroy it all together or revamp it by hiring people who know movies and those you cannot be bought.
Hillbilly Elegy (2020)
Raw and emotional look at life and triumphant
I love this movie. I watched it twice and I wept at parts of the movie, especially the scene where mamaw talks with Vance in the car after picking him up from the store he tried to steal a calculator.
The movie is poignant and the acting is superb on all the main characters. I feel people who did not appreciate the film are those who grew up privileged and have narrow preconceived notions about stereotypes and what it's means.
For me, this movie is raw and delicate at the same time. It's emotionally heavy but relatable at core. It's about life, choices, humanity, and triumphant.
Hjartasteinn (2016)
An impeccable movie. Artistic. Moving. Great sense of directing and acting.
This movie is underrated and deserves more publicity and awards in my opinion. The cinematography is gorgeous. The directing is great. The story is so moving and it's a invitation to small town private life of youths, realistic, powerful, moving, and emotional. The actors are top-notch. They understand acting at heart.
I am in awe after watching it and compelled to write this review.
Brilliant!. It's on par with God's own country, and better than Call me by your name, and Brokeback mountain in my view.