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mikham
Reviews
The Mistress of Spices (2005)
Don't go in with high expectations
I don't know what to say about this film. I went into it with zero expectations, apart from Aishwarya Rai to look stunning. So I was sort of pleasantly surprised. Make no mistake though, it is a poor film.
Ill keep it short because there isn't really much to say.
Story: Tilo (Aishwarya) is part of some ancient mystical cult which uses the power of spices to heal people, around the world. So she sets up shop in Oakland. She also has to relinquish any sort of personal desires, and can never leave the shop. Then she meets Doug (Dylan McDermott) and so the normal culture clash thing which pops up in every single one of Gurinder Chadha's films ensues. Blah blah blah...the end There are numerous flaws, but Ill start with the positives The Good - Aishwarya looked great. And she had a consistent accent. Performance was relatively good, given the other flaws inherent in this film - Santosh Sivan did a great job with cinematography. San Francisco looked fantastic Errm I think thats about it The Bad - The script was weak. there was no character development and it was padded out too much with contrived and unnecessary subplots. Anupam Kher was so badly wasted. I mean I think that some subplot was needed to show the way the spices work (or however you want to word it), but they really detracted form the main story, which itself wasn't up to much in the first place.
- I think the very basic concept of the film was handled poorly. the makers never seemed to know themselves whether they were making a realistic film or some sort of magical/mystical fantasy. And resultantly there was no sort of ambiance, build-up or anything to keep someone interested to the end of it.
- Absolutely no chemistry at all between Aishwarya and Dylan McDermott - On the same point, the performances were average at best. I think the fault does lie in the script and the direction as no one had any real scope for performance and they were all just basically required to look good for the camera.
- Unnecessary voice-overs, really got to me As I said, if you go in with no expectations at all, you could well enjoy it, but its still a poorly made film.
4/10
Yeh Dil (2003)
Oh dear....
Yeh Dil is an amateurish, typical, B-grade film. It has absolutely nothing new to offer and has been done thousands upon thousands of times before.
Poor acting, writing, directing, horrible music.
What on Earth the makers were thinking when they made this film, I well never know. Maybe they were high or something.
Tusshar Kapoor...well the less said the better. Maybe he is trying to prove that the only reason he is working in films is because of his family connections.
Anyway, do not watch this film even if you are paid to.
Mujhse Shaadi Karogi (2004)
Why did this even see the light of day?
Even by David Dhawan standards, this was far-fetched, uninspired, unoriginal and just plain bad. Whether it was the acting, the writing, the directing or just the film itself, it starts badly and continues rolling downhill.
The only jokes that are remotely funny are the ones they copied from Meet the Parents, and that too only when you close your eyes and imagine Meet the Parents in place of this film.
The characters are spineless, inconsistent and completely undeveloped. The plot twist at the end is very, very predictable. The climax is also stupid and illogical.
The actors were bad. Salman Khan was his usual self, and Priyanka Chopra was wooden. Akshay Kumar was over the top. The less said about Kader Khan the better. Rajpal Yadav was also pretty much below his normal standard.
The only saving grace was a couple of the songs, and some good choreography.
Another thing was poor costume design and ordinary art direction.
All in all, if you want an example of how NOT to make a film, this will probably work as a good template.
If I'm being generous, 2/10.
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)
One film to rule them all
WIthout a doubt, this is the best of the Lord of the Rings films, and even less doubtful is that it is one of the greatest films ever. 3 hours and 20 minutes flies past, and you don't notice how the lower half of your body becomes completely numb. A visual spectacle on the grandest and most refined scale, with an excellent screenplay, great cinematography and excellent acting. Some scenes which will stay in your mind, will be the march by the Rohirrim, Legolas bringing down an oliphaunt accompanied by Gimli's reaction, Eowyn v. the Witch King and Aragorn's speech. The interactions between Frodo, Sam and Gollum provide for very absorbing viewing as well. The seige of Minas tirith is amazingly done as is the battle at the Black Gate and the bit in Mount Doom. All in all, well worth seeing again and again and again...
Maybe if there was one tiny flaw, it was that the ending does seem to drag on a little bit, but after what you witness preceeding that, you don't really care.