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Eichmann (2007)
4/10
Liberties Taken With the Truth End Up Burying This Movie (and the good acting work)
6 July 2013
First, the good stuff:

Thomas Kretschmann's work here is superb, truly superb, particularly in light of the fact that the film interrupts this superb acting with cutaways to various scenes while the voice of Kretschmann as Eichmann is heard writing letters to his children. I don't CARE. Give me more of Kretschmann being interrogated. He is riveting.

Now, the bad stuff:

The 'artistic license' this film takes is shameful in that it is an insult to every single jew who was murdered by the Nazi regime. There is no good reason for the filmmakers to have given Eichmann a Viennese Jew for a mistress. The notes of Eichmann's interrogator, Avner Less, do not mention anything about this, nor did it come up in Eichmann's Nuremberg trial-in-absentia or the Israeli trial. Nor was there a need to make Eichmann the lover of a Hungarian mistress who was so insatiable for the deaths of jews that she would reprimand him for not killing enough while they engaged in foreplay. This is obscene and it obscures the larger truth that seemingly inconsequential, everyday men can do terrible damage.

To take these liberties is an attempt to obscure the monster that Eichmann really was. To remove the inexplicable terror that is the result of banal men doing unspeakable things in the name of ideology and / or the protection of a larger group of criminals, is misguided at best and an insult to every Jewish man, woman and child who walked into those building thinking they were going to get a shower.

They should have stuck to the text of "The Eichmann Interrogation" and let the actors use their skills to produce the tension. That's what they are paid for, after all, and I would have liked to have seen more of the interaction between the two main characters.

I give it a '4' on the strength of Thomas Kretschmann's acting alone. Otherwise this movie is a terrible waste of time.
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Push (2009)
Worth Watching (if Only For the Scenery Alone!)
19 November 2011
All of the reviews I've read of this movie have savaged it and, personally, I didn't think it was nearly bad as bad as all that. There were some interesting characters (the guy they enlist to help them hide themselves from the bad guys comes to mind here), and it put a new and interesting spin on the whole "people with super powers" genre. BUT...what really makes me love this film is the depictions of Hong Kong. See, I have been living in Hong Kong for almost 5 years now and I've told all my friends and family that if they want to get a good look at the many sides of the city (other than the touristy facade is typically presented), watch this movie. The film makers really did a great job of capturing what it's like to wander around Hong Kong, and the cinematography is like eye candy.
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The Traveler (I) (2010)
3/10
First half isn't too bad
30 January 2011
Val Kilmer carries this movie for the first half and then when the other characters start to talk amongst themselves more the wheels fall off. God, after that it's just BRUTALLY bad. It's almost as though there are two movies here or, at the very least, two screenwriters - one so-so, the other an imbecile. At some point the dialogue gets really horrendous, the plot devices get more ridiculous, and you suddenly realize that you're only still watching because what seemed like it might be good has now become a train wreck that you just can't stop watching. I hope Kilmer got paid well because this isn't going to do much for his legacy.
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Monsters (2010)
1/10
Monstrously BORING
31 December 2010
This movie was terrible. There's really no monsters per se- just enormous walking squid-like creatures, and they're only in the movie for about 3 minutes in total. I should also note that the special effect squids in question are not at all well done.

This is mainly a road movie about two boring people with boring problems who utter boring things to each other for what seems like an eternity. There was really no point to this movie that I could discern, other than that we shouldn't be mean to monsters, or monsters are people too (or something like that). Also, if you're planning on watching it because you like horror movies you can forget it because this is not even a little bit scary. The crazy bag lady at an hour and 17 minutes in to the movie was the highlight for me, and she didn't even have any meaning in terms of the story.
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Swept Away (2002)
1/10
This movie gives dreck a bad name
16 October 2010
This is perhaps the worst movie I've ever seen, and I've seen Gigli. It is, however, unintentionally hilarious and as such is worth viewing with friends and some drinks while making jokes all the while- ala Mystery Science Theater.

At our party we made a game of it by taking a drink when certain things happened. Shot of Madonna's biceps? Everybody drink!

If you decide to do this and you want to get really hammered, try taking a drink every time Madonna says something in her fake British accent. You'll be drunk in no time and then - BONUS! - the movie won't seem as horrific as it really is.
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Bone Eater (2007 TV Movie)
1/10
The Holy Grail of Godawful movies!
4 July 2009
If you're like me and you occasionally enjoy watching terrible movies (I guess it's kind of like slowing down at a car crash), you can't do better than this! The plot is inane, the special effects are hilarious and the acting is some of the worst you'll ever see! 4 THUMBS DOWN! WOOOHOOOOOOOO!!! Seriously, I have no idea how the director and the "actors" can sleep at night! It's painful, and yet hysterically funny, to watch and I highly recommend it for those who want to punish themselves for something. If you can watch this crap without wincing, you're a better man than I'll ever be! I wonder if the producer of this garbage had any idea what he was getting himself (and his money) into!
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