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Horizon: An American Saga - Chapter 1 (2024)
Empty Horizons
A movie usually tells a story, has a plot, defines the main characters, and has a resolution at the end of the film.
There is absolutely no story, in this film, at all. You are witness to scene after scene of nothing. It basically feels like you are just sitting on your porch watching as people just walk by and catching a few phrases of their conversations.
Most of the film feels unnecessary: the long, long, extremely long conversation with the prostitute and Kevin Costner's feels like a bad soap opera. Every conversation is horribly long and it drags the film out and creates a boring, uninteresting environment.
A complete waste of time.
Jackpot! (2024)
Busted
I did not enjoy any aspect of this movie. John Cena is not an actor and will never be an actor. Cena is an entertainer and he has to learn to accept projects that can survive with his limited range.
The first thing Cena has to do is work with someone who can compliment his lack of acting ability and Awkwafina is not that person.
There has never been anyone in the history of film as annoying as Awkwafina. She is the human embodiment of Jar Jar Binks. Every single movie that she has been in, she has marred it with her presence.
The film is badly written and badly directed, but it also has no chance with the combination of Cena and Awkwafina.
Superman Returns (2006)
Miscast
Superman Returns had potential to be a decent movie. Superman Returns is horribly miscast though and between the miscasting and juvenile script it cost the film.
There is a reason that Kate Bosworth is not a household name - she is an awful actress who is limited. She was terrible as Lois Lane and it was a bad casting choice to choose beauty over talent. Every scene that she is in is annoying and while the script called for some very idiotic scenes - her lack of talent highlighted how idiotic those scenes were to the film.
Kevin Spacey was badly miscast as Lex Luther. He is supposed to be the same Luther that Gene Hackman brought to the screen, but he portrayed the character as dull and boring.
The story was not great - but many superhero movies are lacking in the script area. Decent performances can still make a silly script entertaining, but Spacey and Bosworth are so bad that they make you notice how badly the script was written.
Adam Sandler: Love You (2024)
No Love
From the first scene to the end; this special is absolutely awful.
What was the reason for Sandler to show up to the studio with a broken windshield? Was there a joke there? What was supposed to be funny about walking through the crowd in the alley? What was so funny about the kid with pictures of Sandler sleeping on his couch? What was so funny about the staff giving him coffee with the wrong sweetener? What was supposed to be funny about the video monitor not working?
The jokes felt forced and they were poorly written. I think that the audience was drunk or high because there wasn't anything worth laughing at.
A poor performance.
The Fall Guy (2024)
Fell Flat On It's Face
What a giant mess of a movie.
Did anyone read the synopsis of Lee Majors' The Fall Guy before production? The Fall Guy was about a stunt man who moonlights as a bounty hunter. Now that would have made a new franchise for the right director and actor. Sadly there is absolutely nothing (except the character name and movie title) that any similarity to the original idea.
Ryan Gosling is a terrible actor who has just come back into the public eye for being in another poor, but popular movie. He is awful as Colt and very miscast.
Emily Blunt is lifeless in her role and there is no chemistry between the characters. She looks like she was regretting this role.
Aaron Taylor-Johnson could win the award for worst actor of this generation. He was just as bad as Lex Luther in Batman vs Superman. Actually makes Jessie's god awful performance look better.
The central idea of this movie is pitiful: framing Colt for a murder he did not commit. Horrible screenplay. The entire drug induced sequence was one of the worst sequences in movie history. I guess someone thought that it would be funny, but it was annoying. The idea that an entire party of people would go along with things doesn't make sense. There were a lot of people in the room when the incident happened and that is conveniently ignored. I mention the aforementioned statement because at the end of the movie they are killing off witnesses- but that entire room of witnesses is ignored. Another example of bad screenwriting. That everyone is trying to kill Colt to cover up the crime is trite since the incident was an accident and calling the police would have probably just given the Taylor-Johnson character community service.
Finally let's look at the background movie being made - what a stupid and ridiculous idea. Space Cowboy loves alien.
Definitely on the list of crap movies.
Incident in a Small Town (1994)
Why?
Incident in a Small Town is a below average movie that was lacking an intelligent script.
I decided to watch this movie because I am a fan of Harry Morgan. I grew up watching him in M. A. S. H and Support Your Local Sheriff and Support Your Local Gunfighter. Even though he was at the twilight of his career, I was hoping for something good.
The entire movie could have ended with the court having the knowledge that the defendant was raped when she was young and thus producing a child. But the entire movie she argued about revealing this information with the lame excuse that it would hurt her son. Rather than tell the truth she lies and lies which actually demeans her character. She really is not considering her son because she would rather rot in prison than tell the truth; which would leave him without a parent.
What a stupid concept with a terrible character.
Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F (2024)
F
At least the producers were honest and gave us the true rating of this movie in the title: Axel F.
The cast is way too old for this movie to be believable. Sometimes you can get a seasoned cast together and it can work - but not this time.
The script was badly written and highly predictable. The second that you meet Kevin Bacon's character you already know that he is the main antagonist. You already know that eventually he is going to abduct Foley's daughter; you already know that Rosewood and Taggart are going to be pinned down together in a gun fight; and you already know the predictable ending.
Not a movie that I would recommend.
Sous la Seine (2024)
Underwhelming
You could tell that the movie was going to be bad when the main character is dragged down into the ocean by a shark and manages to swim back to the surface. The shark dragged her so far down that she would have drowned long before making it back to the surface. If the shark was that aggressive towards her then why did it not attack before she swam back to the boat?
What a terrible movie with a horrible premise - that trash mutated a shark that quickly. Of course the movie has the idiots who want to go into the water with an aggressive animal to "save it" rather than destroy something that is not only killing people, but is that aggressive that it is sure to be destroying ocean life.
John Wayne, l'Amérique à tout prix (2019)
Bias
A terrible documentary that was a constant attack on John Wayne's character. The director/producers obviously had strong resentments towards John Wayne and went out of their way to make Wayne look like a villain.
Getting veterans to put down Wayne was also tasteless. I am a veteran and I do not dislike or disparage an actor for making a military movie. The show displays Wayne's appreciation of veterans and his work in supporting veterans and then the producers (and only two veterans) try to belittle Wayne for The Green Berets. That is like hating Ben Affleck for the extremely false look at Pearl Harbor.
I was looking for a quality documentary about John Wayne. I would have entertained some negative views if it did not feel like a smear campaign of Wayne's character the entire production.
Mission: Impossible - Dead Reckoning Part One (2023)
Dead Franchise
Dead Reckoning is the worse Mission Impossible ever made.
So what hurts this movie? The terrible story makes the movie feel like a big joke; the sheer stupidity of the thief constantly running away when she is told how dangerous the stolen item is; the fact that Hunt did not just shoot her and get the key that is destroying the world; the way too many chase scenes because of the idiotic thief; the cliche part of the story that Hunt's superior is directly involved; or the absolute abysmal performance of Hayley Atwell that completely destroys the film.
Atwell is annoying every single scene that she is involved in.
Meg 2: The Trench (2023)
Swim Away
I am not sure if any movie can be dumber than Meg 2. What kind of idiot would try and keep a meg in captivity? What kind of idiot would swim with that meg? Why would anyone go back into the trench to once more be exposed to prehistoric sharks? How does a base mysteriously show up in an area- and at a depth- where no one can go? How does that base become built with prehistoric sharks around and not be attacked?
Meg 2 has so many plot holes; so many terrible situations; so many mindless actions and encounters; and some of the worse characters you have ever seen.
An absolutely terrible movie that is not worth watching.
Napoleon (2023)
Napoleon Bore - aconte
The historic Napoleon has a ton of source material that would translate to a very interesting movie. Sadly, the interesting source material is ignored and we have the usual "Prometheus" bogged down and boring movie that Ridley Scott enjoys making.
Napoleon was a great innovator and strategist. None of that is portrayed in the movie. His military mind is completely ignored.
Napoleon won a lot of battles. Again this is ignored. Yes, there are a few battle scenes. These scenes are very short and have zero substance to them. The battle scenes that you see in the preview is almost as long as the actual scenes in the movie.
The majority of the movie is about his relationship with his wife and the scandal from her infidelity.
This is a complete borefest with little substance and a complete lack of the Napoleon history.
Singing Guns (1950)
Stinging Gun
Singing Guns is a decent film that had the backbone to be a very good 7-8 rated western.
I enjoy watching Ward Bond and Walter Brennan movies and having the two of them together made me believe that this would be a good movie. While Bond and Brennan are as good , and entertaining, as they usually are in their roles - Vaughn Monroe is so horribly bad that he degrades every single scene that he is in. Monroe has no charisma, no acting ability and is stiff and wooden in every scene. His delivery of each line is a stinging gun to your senses.
If this film had cast a different lead it could have been very good.
Shoot Out (1971)
Bad Shot
I was surprised to see Gregory Peck in a movie as bad as Shoot Out.
The story was boring, predictable and poorly written. The scene where he meets the widow and all of the sudden she is in love with him was poorly executed and there was such a lack of chemistry between the two characters.
Of course, you knew the antagonist would bust in as soon as Peck hugged the woman. The scenes following were long and drawn out and they were annoying rather than the dramatic feeling that they should have received.
Acting was the absolute bottom of the barrel with the three gunmen being more annoying than JarJar Binx.
I am not sure how anyone rated this turkey above a 3.
Gåten Ragnarok (2013)
Jurassic Rip off
You have seen this before - so many moments stolen from other monster movies and mashed together: the assistant who steals the creature's egg (Jurassic Park III), the person who steals for profit (Jurassic Park I and many other movies); the rope across the water (Rogue); these are just a few examples of unoriginal ideas taken from other films.
The idea that a multi thousand year old creature is alive without a substantial food source and just happens to have an egg ready to hatch is ridiculous. Add to the idiocy the assistant who risks everyone to take the infant creature back to civilization.
Not the worse movie, but not anything worth watching.
The Exorcist: Believer (2023)
Exorcise the Ending
The Exorcist was a decent movie. It had the right atmosphere for a possession movie; the correct amount of tension and suspense; a decent performance by all of the involved characters; and a decent build-up for the expected exorcism.
Just when you think that things are going to become intense and you are wondering how the two girls are going to be saved - the film sells out and just ends in a very anti- climactic fashion. You just sat through all of this build up for a major letdown.
What could have been a worthy addition to possession movies falls flat on it's face in the last act. So flat that you feel cheated. It was a lazy and uninspiring ending that took away from a good start.
Heart of Stone (2023)
Flat as a Stone
Heart of Stone is not a bad movie - nor is it a good movie.
The action has all been done before; the story has been told many times before; the concept is extremely old and you will find nothing new or exciting in this movie.
If you are looking for a slightly different retelling of the same old spy action story then you may find that this film will be comfort food for your tastes.
If you are looking for something more entertaining than this is not the movie for you. The film drags and plods along with minimal storytelling and a continuous repetition of many older films. Originality is sorely lacking.
Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny (2023)
Raiders of a Garbage Movie
The Last Crusade should have been the last entry in the Indiana Jones storyline. The character should have gone out on top. The movie business never learns and the greedy try to profit off of successful films with terrible sequels.
The fourth entry was terrible with a pitiful script and terrible acting. Why try again when it was evident that the Indiana Jones magic was gone.
Now we have The Dial of Destiny. Destiny has now proven that Indiana Jones is done. This script is even worse than the fourth entry, Ford is absolutely dreadful as Jones, the supporting cast is miserable and it is just beyond bad.
Extraction 2 (2023)
Cliché
Extraction II offers nothing new to the action movie genre. In the first couple of minutes you can have the entire story figured out.
The one cliche that annoys me is that the baddie always cries and carries on about one of their loved ones dying - yet they kill hundreds of other people's loved ones and are the one responsible for their loved one dying by being evil. It is time to take this old, worn out cliche out of movies.
The other action movie cliche that has been so overplayed is where the hero is so injured and damaged, but remarkably regains his battle prowess and martial arts techniques overnight. It is so ridiculous to see anyone who needs months, or years, of rehab become super in days.
Thor: Love and Thunder (2022)
Thunderously Bad
Marvel Cinemas have lost their magic. The studio has become so greedy and it has flooded the superhero movie market with garbage not worth watching. Each movie has been worse than it's predecessor and the quality has been lacking.
There are no more Iron Man or Captain America quality movies anymore.
I did not know if there would be a movie worse than Captain Marvel, but Morbius proved me wrong. I did not think you could get worse, but this Thor was the bottom of the Marvel universe.
Natalie Portman is so bad in this movie - even more wooden than she was in Star Wars. It also did not help that the dialogue felt childish.
Uncharted (2022)
Chart A Course For Better Waters
Bad casting and a lackluster script create an average movie. The Nathan Drake - Scully relationship is completely warped and it actually takes away from the film. Chloe wasn't even needed since her character is a wooden caricature of the game version. All this untrust between the main characters created a group of characters that you could care less about. The movie missed the father-son type of relationship that Drake-Skully should have had.
The Green Knight (2021)
Green Knight Goes Politically Correct
A very uninspired version of a classic tale. The story was a terrible interpretation that felt bogged down and boring. The film could not even get the main character's name right.
Jungle Cruise (2021)
Familiar Cruise
Disney decided to copy just about every aspect from the Brendon Fraser Mummy movies. Each of the three main characters are identical to the three mains of the Mummy and a bunch of the scene come straight from the Mummy movies.
The sad thing is that Johnson cannot act. He is an entertainer who can be good in the right situation, but this isn't one of them. Blunt was flat - very flat - not sure if she was trying too hard to be Rachel Weisz, but it was not her best performance.
The action was dull and boring - been there, seen it, and seen it again and again and again.
The story just fell apart at the end:
1- The cursed people can go so far from the river before it recalls them. But somehow the Rock gets his former companions into a cave - which by the way - would be closer to the water and imprisons them. That didn't make sense.
2- The story tells how the tree blooms every time the moon is at a certain stage. Of course, it happens during this cruise. But it also means that it happens often - so the fight for one petal (from the tree) doesn't make sense since the tree will rebloom as soon as that lunar cycle comes again.
3- The German character was such a bad, bad, bad and idiotic presence that was unnecessary - I guess they figured they would add an Indiana Jones moment to the film.
4- There was only one way into the tree's home - one way - yet Johnson slams his boat into the opening and seals it. Now, the water is right behind the wreck of the boat so the cursed individuals are still in range of the water (according to the earlier scenes) so that did not make sense. And then with the entrance sealed - how do they get out? If they free the boat then the cursed individuals come back - and without a boat how do they manage to get back to civilization? Did they swim all of those miles?
I gave this film a 5 because of the visuals. It is a decent rental film for a mindless adventure night. The story and acting are just terrible though.
Black Widow (2021)
Back in Black
I have noticed that this movie is getting a lot of bad press. After seeing the trailer, so long ago, I had my doubts about this film - especially since Marvel is making a lot of recent garbage.
This movie will surprise you. While it is not going to be considered in the upper echelon of Marvel movies; it falls in the middle of the pack. No where near as bad as Captain Marvel or Black Panther.
There are flaws in the movie, but they do not tear it down to a bad level - they just keep it from rising to a better rating.
Scarlett. Johansson had always been a rather average performer. Another reason to doubt this film. The surrounding cast pushes the film ahead and makes it work.
Is it anything new? No - and in the beginning the same old car/motorcycle chase you have seen over and over makes you think that the film would crash. Once the film gets the crew (the four characters from the first ten minutes) back together is when the film becomes interesting.
The one glaring weakness was the portrayal of Taskmaster. He was always a Captain America antagonist for one thing - but that doesn't take away. The problem is the creation of Taskmaster in the film - it was just ridiculous.
Good movie - not great - but worth watching.
Richard Jewell (2019)
Jewell of a Film
In the 1770's this nation fought for the "freedom of the press" - they fought so that the press would be able to print unbiased and truthful news without the influence of the government.
This film shows how untruthful, how deceitful, how disgusting and how uncaring the media is towards people. How the news will lie and cheat and destroy just for one unmoral reporter to make a name for themselves.
This film shows how the media can create an environment of hate (we see it every day today) and destroy a person's life.
After watching this movie, I would hope people would wake up and see how deceitful and dishonest the media is today.