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madmanrhc
Reviews
Horror House on Highway Five (1985)
A Cult Classic...On What Planet?
The DVD box reads "A Cult Classic Never Before Released On DVD!" Two questions, a cult classic on what planet and why was it ever released to begin with??
The catch phrase for the movie is "see it or die!!!" I saw it and wanted to die!!! I can accept some inadequacies in any horror movie because all horror movies can't be "Night of the Living Dead" or "Texas Chainsaw Massacre". Unfortunately "Horror House on Highway 5" is way beyond acceptable.
This tragic piece of celluloid has no plot, actors with little talent, terrible dialogue, no continuity and the worst soundtrack I've ever heard.
The only redeeming quality in this movie is Susan Leslie who played Louise "the scientist" Susan is the only, and I mean only, reason I rated this movie a three! Without her, it would be a zero!
Lake Fear 3 (2018)
Mot the worst I've seen.......but damn close
When I watched "Lake Fear" (2014), I didn't think it could get much worse. I WAS WRONG!! "Lake Fear 3" is not the worst movie I've ever seen but it's pretty damn close.
Were all the actors/actresses working from the same script? Better question, WAS there a script?? It appears that during the editing of the final product, and I pray that this is the final, snippets of the film were randomly drawn from a hat and spliced together.
Director Crum should have stopped after the first disaster but felt he could inflict more pain on the movie going public. Congratulations sir, you were successful!!!
Escape to Black Tree Forest (2012)
Don't Go Back to Black Tree Forest....Run Away!!!
Dustin, Dustin, Dustin! Why in the hell would you want to "escape" to Black Tree Forest when you never should have taken us there in the first place? "Terror at Black Tree Forest" (2010) was terrible. Yes, I did rate it a 2 but that was only because there was a 5 second close up of Christina (Suzanne) Leonard's "big beautiful eyes"!!!
Dustin Ferguson has a penchant for the close up filming of nature. I saw more shot of trees, stumps, bushes, grasses, leaves, lakes and rivers than I saw when I visited the National Arboretum in Washington. Unfortunately, none of these nature views had a damn thing to do with the movie!
When someone says "this is a Dustin Ferguson film", they have no idea how right they are. In this film alone, Dustin was Director, Writer, Producer, Cinematographer, Editor, Special Effects, Visual Effects, the voice of Nick the Newsman and other sorted jobs as listed in the ending credits. Unfortunately, he was not very good at any of them!
The only positive thing I can say about this piece of celluloid was the quality of the background music! The songs were written by Mike Dowty and performed by the Mike Dowty Band. You can download the music from "Footprints in the World" from iTunes.
There is an old saying, "fool me once - shame on you, fool me twice - shame on me!" Well Dustin, this is definitely "shame on me"!!!
Be Our Guests (2019)
Be My Guest...
Be My Guest...to destroy every copy of this movie in existence! How can over 80 cast members and several hundred individuals listed in the movie credits make such an awful movie? This movie has absolutely no socially redeeming characteristics and is a disgrace to the film and music industries as a whole!
The director, producers, writers and production assistants should all surrender their film making credentials and apologize to their parents for wasting their money to obtain them! All of the money and effort used to make this worthless piece of celluloid could have been spent on projects that could benefit society.
The only "horror" in this movie was that it was made in the first place. I think my PTSD has returned!!
Bunnyman Vengeance (2017)
Franchise Finished in the Black!
And the final score is: Bunnies 2, Coons 0!! GAME OVER!!!
Asylum: Twisted Horror and Fantasy Tales (2020)
Mum's the word...
My Godly mother always told me that if you couldn't say something nice, don't say anything at all.
Madness of Many (2013)
A tragic waste of cellulose acetate
"Madness of Many" is, without a doubt, the worst movie ever made. This film has no socially redeeming qualities and probably ruined the acting careers of anyone associated with this cinematic fiasco. Kasper Juhl should not be allowed to watch another movie, much less write or direct one. I don't know who the Anti-Christ is but Juhl is a solid candidate!