Change Your Image
elisabethbeighton
Reviews
Red Eye: Episode #1.1 (2024)
What not to do on a business flight
The lesson here is don't order a vegan meal on a slow plane to China, not if you don't want to be poisoned. And if the only available meal on business class has come from a man in handcuffs, be seriously worried. Pity the young businessman who boards the plane, settles into his business class seat and finds the only available meal for him is one allocated to a man in handcuffs who prefers to get tanked on gin and claims not to have touched the vegan repast he offers. The businessman then feels unwell and has to be rescued from the toilet by a steward only to collapse with a suspected heart attack.
And don't expect to survive treatment from the only doctor on the plane, a man who at first looks drowsy after a hard night's clubbing where he claims to have been stabbed before being involved in a car crash from which he escaped, allegedly leaving behind a dead girl, to get an earlier flight to London only to be arrested, questioned and put back on a plane to China. A sudden spurt of energy sees him chased through the airport. Drowning his sorrows with gin, would you trust him to save the life of a dying man whom he diagnosed as having a heart attack? CPR from a drunk wielding a defibrillator leaves a young man dead. The doctor goes through the dead man's jacket and bag, notices his own vegan meal and suspects poisoning to be the cause of death. But was the victim meant to be the doctor? Or could the businessman have been a decoy victim?
Certainly, it is one way to escape a long tedious flight and for an actor to escape further involvement in an absurd plot in a minimally acted drama. Maybe ordering that poisoned vegan meal wasn't such a bad move.
Emma Fielding Mysteries: More Bitter Than Death (2019)
Smart suits and dodgy accents
Jim Conner scrubs up well in a smart suit, compared with his persona as the scruffy FBI agent of previous mysteries, but then he does have to up the ante if he wants to compete for Emma's affections with the suave archaeologist with the Savile Row rip-off tailoring and the dodgy British accent. Meanwhile, as usual, she is more than capable of fighting off the villain herself leaving the rivals literally on the floor yet dapper as before. The mystery is why Courtney Thorne Smith's Emma would even give Mark Valley's Duncan Thatcher a second glance when she can have James Tupper's Jim Conner - the down to earth real man with a taste for burgers and casual wear rather than the fake Englishman with his tux and caviar.
Family History Mysteries: Buried Past (2023)
Gimcrack Genealogy
The title seems to be a bit of a misnomer. The mystery, such as it is, does not need the skills of a genealogist to solve it, and Sophie shows no signs of any professional skills. As a supposedly successful New York physician, Jackson should be better placed to find a bone marrow match for his brother. And if he is such a hotshot, why hasn't he done so instead of playing second fiddle to the girl he once had a crush on but never admitted it. As in the Aurora Teagarden Mysteries, Niall Matter is once again playing the male eye candy sidekick, rather ineffectual love interest meant to be an intellectual equal but only there as an occasional action man's who goes along with the lead taken by the heroine. And he doesn't really get the girl in the end, either; just a chaste high school sweetheart kiss. Not much history, not much mystery and not much chemistry.
The Good Ship Murder (2023)
Cruise ship crooner solves crimes and murders tunes
Cruise ship crooner solves ludicrous mysteries in brightly coloured shirts and shorts with the help of his love interest, the ship's first officer who seems too lightweight to be future captain material. He then dons tuxedo to murder the lounge tunes he belts out, his singing as wooden as his acting. Catherine Tyldesley seems embarrassed by her role and Shayne Ward appears out of his depth. This is not meant to be demanding viewing, rather something frothy for the end of a working week. The leads look good, the settings are attractive but that is as far as it goes. Somehow this viewer never cares who the murderer is or who the leading lady will end up with. What is obvious from the start of each episode is who the murderer is and that Shayne Ward will murder a song at the end.
Haunted by Murder (2022)
Scooby Doo without the dog
While sticking to the familiar formula followed in all the Aurora Teagarden mysteries, this one strays into the territory of another series of comedy mysteries, Scooby Doo. We have the setting of a haunted house, seemingly supernatural goings on that are actually the work of incompetent criminals, danger in secret passages, ghost hunters, the librarian, comic capers and an obvious solution.
Which character most resembles the cartoon dog with his goofiness and tenacity to solve the mystery can easily be deduced. However there is one character from the cartoon who is unmistakable. With his newly acquired and unflattering beard and greasy hair, the leading man is transformed into Shaggy. Usually it is difficult to distinguish him at first glance from the policeman (or indeed his predecessor as love interest - our heroine goes in for a certain type of man). Now the policeman and his wife appear as the glamour couple. Shaggy is more pathetic. Scooby saves the day.
World on Fire (2019)
Untouched by fire
Harry Chase is a young man of his time - the 2020s rather than the 1940s. This romantic hero somehow manages to pull off a performance as a modern day heartthrob going through a world war with his 21st century hairstyle unruffled and his costumes untouched. His three piece suit and perfectly knotted tie remain immaculate throughout the bombing and fall of Warsaw. Even when he is knocked down by a blast, not a hair is out of place and no dust mars his pristine suit. His uniform never loses its smartness throughout the retreat to Dunkirk. He even looks dapper as an SOE agent back in occupied Poland pursued by the enemy. Back in civics on his brief return home before donning uniform again to cut a dapper figure in another field of war, he remains Nor does he ever sound other than a hip young man of today. Actor Jonah Hauer King obviously has an image to maintain as a man of today.
It is the same with many of his co stars, including his wife and girlfriend and his girlfriend's brother, who all go through their wartime ordeals with hairstyles that would have been out of place in the 1940s and look glamorous whatever befalls them. Fit companions to the wooden handsome Harry, who never quite gets fired up nor blackened by the flames of a world on fire.
To Catch a Spy (2021)
Location deserves better
Beautiful location in Malta, but the acting is almost as stiff as Colin Donnell's nondescript suits. He looks awkward and his exaggerated facial expressions suggest that he is in pain, more to do with the poor script, absurd plot and clumsy dialogue than his uncomfortable wardrobe. There is no charisma between Donnell and Nathalie Kelley, the two leads, while the supporting characters are curiously left undefined and the obvious overacting villain a caricature. Suspense and atmosphere are sadly lacking, as is humour despite a few feeble attempts at raising a smile.
The title is obviously a nod to Hitchcock with Malta being a cut price location, but Colin Donnell is no Cary Grant and his dull suits have none of the style nor presence of those worn by Grant in his films. At least no suits were harmed in the making of this movie, perhaps because of the lack of action. It is the location that deserves better than this movie.
The Salisbury Poisonings (2020)
Lockdown drama that wasn't intended as such
First shown in the dark days of the first national Covid lockdown, this drama about a public health emergency was given an extra frisson of terror. Salisbury in the grip of a health focused emergency seemed emblematic of the world at the time the story was aired, although that would have seemed unthinkable when it was filmed. Anne Marie Duff as Tracy Daszkiewicz stands for health professionals having to balance personal family responsibilities with her public duties in saving the lives of people at risk.
Since then the invasion of the Ukraine and a string of unexplained deaths of Putin's critics has put the state terrorist angle back into focus, which continues to make the series only too relevant. The stories of innocent victims resonate at different levels of society. In MyAnna Buring's portrayal of Dawn Sturgess we see a woman on the edge of society who is struggling to rebuild her frail life only to be an innocent victim of poisoning.
In contrast the police officer Nick Bailey, played by Rafe Spall and seen more often in his sober suit than in his police uniform comes from a more settled and respectable background. Although unlike Dawn Sturgess, Nick Bailey survived, his life is totally destroyed by his experience. His only fault - to be first at the scene of the crime. His possessions, clothes, furniture, family photographs and memorabilia, his car and even his children's toys are all destroyed for fear of contamination. He and his family have to leave their home. His wife, acted by Annabel Scholey, not only has to deal with her family life being uprooted but also the probability that Nick will die. In one harrowing scene she is allowed to her once happy home to collect her cat. Both the cat and Nick survive.
This was a compelling drama especially in the context of its airing.
Kessler (1981)
Not a true sequel
Not really a sequel to Secret Army, despite the brief appearances of Monique, Albert and Natalie, all of whom are wasted in the first episode. Hopes are raised that they will have a major part to play but these are soon dashed. Kessler himself seems less menacing if still unsympathetic but suffers from the lack of interplay and rivalry with his Luftwaffe counterparts. His rise in the Nazi hierarchy is unconvincing. He still has a pretty boy assistant now in a three piece suit rather than SS uniform though Franz is nastier, more ambitious and devious than his two predecessors. Kessler's daughter Ingrid does not have the humanising effect of her mother Madeleine but is a caricature of a neo Nazi madchen. The Nazi hunters lack depth and the ageing Nazis are stereotypes. The pace, characterisation, dramatic structure, tension and atmosphere are all inferior to Secret Army. All told a disappointment unworthy of its inspiration, it would have been better if there were no link with Secret Army.
Sister Boniface Mysteries (2022)
Comic book capers
From the titles to the somewhat repetitive plots, larger than life characters and the quirky acting, this series at times feels like it is straight from a comic book. While some of the cast try to give serious performances, others play up to stereotypes. As a result it feels like they belong to different dramas. The detective from Bermuda plays his part as if he were in a straight drama. His ageing pretty boy boss, by contrast, shows that he does not take it too seriously and adopts an ironical manner in keeping with his casual and sloppy appearance.. The title character is just too whimsical and her convent has the whiff of St Trinians about it. The village in which it is set is a world that could never have existed and the version of the 1960s in which it is set is as much of a caricature as it's inhabitants. It looks good. A fantastical diversion but ultimately too superficial to engage with for long.
Father Brown: The Menace of Mephistopheles (2022)
Distancing
Not only is there social distancing among the cast, but emotionally there's is an element of distancing amongst the characters. The murder victim's son and daughter seem strangely indifferent to their father's death. The daughter seems unconcerned about her brother being arrested for the murder and when her new husband is revealed as a villain. The murderer, himself motivated by a miscarriage of justice, seems happy to see an innocent young man arrested for the crime and the police inspector, concerned for his abducted family, shows no sympathy for the innocent man he has framed.. That amiable and somewhat bewildered young man, in turn, is more worried about where he can get his next alcoholic drink than in his plight. At least the actor playing him adds a touch of humour.
Identity Thief (2013)
Is Sandy with a stolen suit and credit card Identity Thief 2?
With a plot revolving Jason Bateman's honest, dull and slightly dim Sandy Patterson trying to put right the havoc in his life caused by Melissa McCarthy's zany and dishonest Diana Budgie's theft of his identity, it is overlooked that Sandy himself steals the identities of two other characters. In need of respectable clothes, Sandy follows a well dressed businessman into a gym locker room and steals his expensive looking, suit, shirt, tie and shoes. Having stolen the identity and appearance of a business executive, he is then able to con an accounts executive in order to steal the identity of his despicable boss Harold Cornish and thereby clone Cornish's credit card. Sandy looks much smarter in the stylish dark suit, white shirt and red tie and pocket square he has stolen than in his own suits and ties seen at the start of the film. The clothes could have been tailored for him (and probably were for Jason Bateman). In effect he has stolen a more masterful and dynamic persona from the rightful owner of his new suit. He has no qualms in taking Diana to dinner in a fancy restaurant paid for with the fraudulent credit card while he himself is resplendent in someone else's suit. While arguably Cornish deserves to be cheated, no thought is given to the innocent gym goer who will find himself without any clothes when he returns to his locker and can no longer be counted a master of the universe without his slick suit. He is as much a victim of identity theft as Sandy. Is Sandy any less guilty of crime than Diana? He is Identity Thief 2 in this film.
Titanic (2012)
Shallow but sinking drama
There are enough dramatic stories without Julian Fellowes inventing new ones involving real life people in tawdry tales that do not reflect their true stories. Harry Widener's romance with the fictional Lady Georgiana Grex is a case in point. Harry Widener was in love with his books, supposedly going to his grave with his latest acquisition in the pocket of his immaculate evening suit. At 27 he was unmarried, reserved in manner, fastidious in appearance and his closest friends were fellow bibliophiles, most of them older men. He spent most of his evenings on Titanic, according to his mother, with the artist Frank Millet, who was bisexual. Possibly Harry Widener was gay or had no interest in sex or just hadn't met a woman he liked more than his collecting, but it is not being true to the real man to give him a shallow whirlwind romance. Noah Reid is too youthful and too good looking to impersonate Harry in a role that lacks depth. Although he and the other Titanic victims perished in the ocean depths, this miniseries never leaves the shallow waters just as surely as it sinks as drama.
Pride of Our Alley (1983)
Dead ringer without the vocals
A fascinating insight into the troubled life of a great performer. Polly Hemingway gives a sterling performance and convinces as Gracie Fields throughout her life. She even looks like Gracie. The one thing missing is the voice. Polly just cannot reach the high notes nor the range from raucous to operatic that was unique to Gracie Fields. No one could.
The Taking of Pelham 123 (2009)
The Man who Can't Urinate
In one scene of this less than memorable remake a young businessman type hostage is desperate to relieve himself. At first it seems like his captors are prepared to leave him in agony or let him suffer the humiliation of wetting the pants of his surprisingly still smart suit, uncreased by the situation he finds himself in. When he is allowed to stand at the carriage door, he is so stressed that he is unable to urinate. As he undoes his flies, a fellow hostage, a young girl, furtively gets a good look at him but doesn't seem too impressed. Instead the cute little boy emits a steady stream on to the tracks, but there are no sparks from the electrified track as the power has obviously been turned off. The pained looking man rejoins his fellow hostages, none of whom have really captured our interest. The scene perhaps captures the problem with this underpowered movie, a weak imitation of its grittier 1974 version. The embarrassment of the young executive, his pained expression and his inability to relieve himself is a fitting emblem for a film which never quite makes it and also for the experience of audience itself held hostage and in need of urgent relief it can not enjoy until the movie has ended. The minor role of Mr Thomas (John Thomas?) is strangely enough the icon for this film.
EastEnders: Secrets from the Square: Karen, Chantelle and Gray (2020)
Why are good looking men in suits bad?
Toby-Alexander Smith the actor is obviously nothing like the character Gray Atkins he plays except in appearance. Here he appears as engaging, thoughtful and socially concerned. He seems to have a good relationship with his co-star Jessica Kate Plummer, who plays his ill fated wife Chantelle. The antithesis of his evil alter ego.
When Gray Atkins made his first appearance in Eastenders, he initially seemed to be charming and generally a good guy. But the warning signs were there. Not in the script nor in the characters behaviour. No, he was young, handsome and, worst of all, he looked good in the three piece suit he wore most of the time., and even better in his tuxedo. Young, middle class, successful and well dressed. Obviously, in Eastenders, short hand, he looked too good to be true - and indeed he was.
Once the truth underneath the lawyer's waistcoat was unbuttoned and he was revealed as a wife abuser, bully, murderer, cheat and unscrupulous player, his decline accelerated. He was now definitely the villain. His scenes with Chantelle were powerful and disturbing.
Why is that when ever a new character turns up in a smart suit, he is immediately marked out as an Eastenders villain?
Tales of the Unexpected: The Landlady (1979)
Stuffed shirt tale with a twist
Siobhan McKenna is a creepy landlady under the dotty and genial veneer. Menace is hinted there from her first appearance. This is a woman who seeks fulfilment by preying on good looking young man, killing them, stuffing them and turning them into her pets.
Billy Weaver is meant to be a naive 18 year old victim, but the actor playing him is perhaps too old for the part which makes him an unconvincing teenager. It would have worked better for Leonard Preston to have simply portrayed him as a besuited rather formal stuffed shirt of a young businessman checking into the bed and breakfast not knowing that his future is about to be stuffed.
Despite the stress on the youth and beauty of Grégory Temple and Christopher Mulholland, the actors playing them as marvels of taxidermy are also too old for their stated ages. It would have been more effective and disturbing to have left their fates, and that of Billy, inferred rather than shown so explicitly at the end.
Perhaps the greatest weakness is that Billy's backstory and character are not sufficiently developed for us to really care what happens to him. Ronald Dahl warns us in his introduction that he finds this tale funny and, while not played for comedy, there is something comic and amusing about the landlady and the plot. We ultimately find Billy's gruesome end and that of the other boys to be amusing rather than frightening. Overall this is an entertaining tale.