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alruin
Reviews
Wrath of Man (2021)
Bore "da bore" McBore
Ok. I stopped after 25 minutes. Let me repeat that. I stopped watching this movie after 25 minutes. In case you are slow: me, no watch, this movie, after 25 minutes. It's like the worst Seagal on ketamine. Jason dude is doing his utter best to be the worst actor in the observable universe. The story is a joke. The characters are a joke. The direction is a joke. The editing is a joke. The ost is a joke. I'm not sure how it ends as i stopped after 25 minutes but I assume it's yet another revenge farce with an angry protagonist and corrupted folks and a kid or wife or father that got killed... Off to bed now watching YP!
The Dead Don't Die (2019)
Dead Hipsters from Cleveland
Haters gonna hate but this movie was fun. Not hilarious as in slapstick but fun. Good old "take the piss with Americans" fun. Innocent people die. There is no happy ending. There is self-mockery by the director. There is a UFO. It's especially fun too to read the reviews here by people who apparently always expect something standardized and can't deal with the avant-garde. Remember from dusk til dawn turning into a "horror" flick? Well, that wasn't obvious either right? My two cents: it's not boring, it's witty, it's an essential zombie movie with unconventional dialogue and odd characters. Smoke a joint, have a beer and give it a try!
Chain Reaction (1996)
Fast fwd to waste less time
One of those movies that sucked from start to end. Nuclear fusion, cia, fbi, blah blah blah. Boring romance, boring ending, boring all the way.
One of those movies that sucked from start to end. Nuclear fusion, cia, fbi, blah blah blah. Boring romance, boring ending, boring all the way.
One of those movies that sucked from start to end. Nuclear fusion, cia, fbi, blah blah blah. Boring romance, boring ending, boring all the way.
One of those movies that sucked from start to end. Nuclear fusion, cia, fbi, blah blah blah. Boring romance, boring ending, boring all the way.
Kumbayaaaaaa. Kumbayaaaaaa.
Sleepers (1996)
Alibi? Lol...
So their 🏈 game alibi invented by de Niro comes up weeks after their arrest. The 2 killers never mentioned to the police about that "alibi"... It suddenly appears and everybody accepts it. Lol.
Bird Box (2018)
I guess I'm too old for this...
So. Evil creatures that the viewer never sees make people who SEE them commit suicide. Who those creatures are and where they come from is unknown. Then there are some lunatics who are not affected by said creatures. These nutters drive cars and ... well that's it basically. They drive cars. Oh wait, this one is gold: the evil creatures are everywhere but they do not enter a house. Ok... Perfectly Normal. Perfectly normal.
Avengement (2019)
I don't think it can be any worse.
Why oh why? I hadn't heard of this "UK action actor" but what a silly movie this is. I guess people who like this are male, between 14 and 17, live in hillbillyland and play violent games if not watching crappy flicks like this one. Nothing makes sense here. Acting is pathetic and the story is grotesque. Bad movie.
Rambo: Last Blood (2019)
Ridiculous of course but lots of blood!
I'm too old for Rambo last blood. I'm fedup with Stallone's moronic acting. I'm fed up with Rambo's tormented soul. I'm fedup with his grotesk McGyver Xxl skills. I'm also fedup with stereotype Mexican cartels and their macho crap. I'm so totally done with this type of movies. But then I read that this flick received negative reviews because of its graphic violence. Hooray, great news at last. Let's watch this and enjoy this OLD BITTER SCARRED MAN KILLS EVERYONE WITH PRIMITIVE SELFMADE TOOLS. Lovely!
Hard Target (1993)
No hope for the human race ... and hair dressers.
Oh common. This flick is garbage. People call it cult because it's the first Woo USA movie, blah blah blah. The story is garbage, JcVd is garbage, female protagonist has only 1 facial expression (eyes and mouth wide open), Henriksen is such an ultimate wannabe bad ass he becomes a clown. If you wanna see bullets flying around watch full metal jacket or platoon. The only interesting thing about this movie is Revell's OST.
Brawl in Cell Block 99 (2017)
Laughable XXL
The acting, the story, the editing, etc. Utterly pathetic and amateuristic. I had never heard of the director but watched it to see Don Johnson and Vaughn. What a total farce this movie is. My advice: Only watch it if you like some oldskool ultraviolence. That part was enjoyable!
The Mist (2007)
Typical American Hysteria Bs
The only original element in this movie is its ending and the fact that the protagonist and the lady taking care of his kid never kissed nor banged. Besides that: yawn. Took me two days to finish this flick. First session I fell asleep which is never a good sign for a supposedly SCARY movie. 2nd session I had read the ending already online and ffwd most scenes. This is not a good horror movie. It's just your typical, generic, Hollywood crap Americans love so much. Popcorn, big coke and some dumb Brenda holding your hand. Oh and there is "morality" and "religion" involved too. Lol'zzzzz!
Blitz (2011)
Boooooooooooooooring
This movie never impresses. It's a very generic and predictable, boring flick. The acting is average. The emotional crap such as the female cop restarting her habit, sooooooooo meaningless. Nah, I was very happy when it stopped and couldn't even remember its beginning.
The Blackout (1997)
Not for American viewers
Excellent movie about obsession, love and addiction. Too complex for most American (ie. Hollywood) viewers to grasp it, at least that's what I think when I read the average review here. Obsession often goes hand in hand with a tendency to addiction. This is well shown here through several tragic events. I love this movie for being real and no happy ending but losers only.
Virus (1999)
Good laugh
This movie is actually okay. Much better imo than Event Horizon for example. I had a great laugh when "captain" was converted into cyborg-freak. Also had great laugh with said captain's cyniscism. Have a few beers, smoke a joint, invite a bird, enjoy life!
Gravity (2013)
Terrible so stopped prematurely
Effects are great. That's it. I stopped the dvd around 45 minutes after being irritated since its start. Utter idiotic and cheesy, typically American "drama" flick. No thx. Will watch Married With Children.
Event Horizon (1997)
Okay'ish but grotesk
Not good not bad. Pseudo-science meets evil through black hole bollocks. Acting is good. Effects are great. Setting is top. But the plot and moreover the end is silly.
Air Force One (1997)
Terrible pathetic patriotic farce
This whole movie made me laugh and sick from the beginning til the end. Full with idiotic stereotypes, a story that doesn't make sense at all, a bad guy who overacts, a president who should have lost his wife or kid as first execution victim (which never happened of course), pathetic drama, terrible cheesy score and most of all so typical American. One of the worst flicks ever seen.
Sam's Song (1969)
Sam's Song is NOT The swap
The dvd i have says the swap but contains Sam's Song. Two completely different movies. The latter, which I'm reviewing here, is quite avant-garde. A young De Niro falls in love with some blond bird. That's it basically. Irrelevant movie unless you fancy Robert with moustache.