Change Your Image
ablack90
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Reviews
Gold (2022)
One star for make-up
At the end ... Zac Efron's face is just .. zombie
This film is about two lads who find a motherlode of gold in the middle of a barren land. With only a little water, one of them chooses to guard the gold while the other drives away in his jalopy to get excavation tools. Wild dogs eventually kill poor Zac while his evil partner looks on through binoculars. Evil guy is shot through the chest as he pulls up in his truck. The viewer is left to guess who did it.
It's a very long drawn out affair. I don't recommend this film to anyone. Unless you are the masochist type. It's very boring. It's a decent enough premise, but there is no intrigue whatsoever. And certainly not enough story to fill a feature length film.
Nothing But the Truth (2008)
Incredibly stupid film
Main character is immediately unlikeable. A reporter who blows a CIA agent's cover. Not winning anyone over with that opener. The CIA agent found evidence contrary to the President's actions with another country but this doesn't give a reporter license to blow a secret agent's cover. All for a mere 48 hour news cycle or her much coveted Pulitzer prize.
I was actually glad Miss Nosey Parker did time in the slammer. Any time she cried I felt nothing. No sympathy whatsoever. Even when her husband left her I was like, yep, that's what I would do. She used dirty tricks to put her career ahead of everyone around her.
She needed a congressman or a senator, not her milquetoast lawyer who didn't get her released from jail for a whole year. The ending reveals her source which is about as compelling as a wet towel after a shower. Just added nothing to the story.
Any actor who took a role in this schlock should rethink their strategy. I especially want better for the great Alan Alda.
Obsession (2023)
The female lead is not sexy enough for Armitage
I stopped watching within the first 20 minutes when they introduce Charlie Murphy's Anna. She is a very poor casting choice. This actress simply cannot sell the womanly allure that would attract a man of Armitage's or Dr Farrow's gravitas. Sporting a pixie cut she locks eyes with him in a manner befitting an intellectually disabled child. If I can't buy the attraction, what's the point?
I went on to read a review that said this might be the year's most unintentionally comical film. Glad I gave it a pass after my instincts. This film creates the furthest thing from Obsession one can imagine.
Actresses who could pull this role off convincingly are Rachel Weisz, Rosamund Pike, or Naomie Harris.
Everything Everywhere All at Once (2022)
Thirty minutes in, I know the Academy's got it wrong
This film is not charming, funny or entertaining. It's loud, chaotic and irritating. A burned out Asian woman named Evelyn, running a laundromat, is on the brink of divorce from her (child?) husband. They take a trip to the IRS office to meet their auditor. She then is pulled into an alternate universe where her husband is somewhat improved but still has a pink piggy on his fanny pack. Weird. He tells Evelyn the multiverse needs her help.
There's some quick expository dialogue about the Alphaverse, "verse jumping" and the big baddy Jobu who wants to destroy everything. Then the characters jump from one universe to another to acquire special skills and fight off Jobu. At one point Evelyn jumps to a universe where she was a martial artist so she can fight Deirdre the auditor off.
Then more exposition where we learn about the young pupil Jobu who's mind was fractured and is a veritable verago who's looking for Evelyn. Then Jobu Tupaki shows up. The Great Evil. Oh my. We get her truth theory (from a bagel) that nothing matters. Several immature scenes ensue. One where Deirdre and her have hot dogs for fingers. One where Evelyn wipes her father's snot into his mouth. Seriously?
All the actors are good but it's the story that fails. We get a montage of quick screen hits of Evelyn in a multitude of different roles. When Deirdre shows up with cops to the laundromat, Evelyn drops into a rock in the desert on a planet with no human life. The rock beside her is her daughter Joy. We eventually learn Jobu just wants someone to share her unique space with. A place with only fractured memories. She needs Evelyn so she doesn't have to end herself alone in the bagel.
In another set of existential sequences, Evelyn fights a bunch of weirdos and resolves some of her inner conflicts. She exorcises Jobu out of her daughter, deals with Joy's teen angst, and ends her odyssey, returning to her original life, having learned a new appreciation for her kind husband and doing laundry and taxes.
It was an exercise in patience sitting through it. Despite the stellar acting cast, it was not my cup of tea.
Knock at the Cabin (2023)
Shyamalan! Stop Making Movies!!
Oh my god! How this ridiculous C grade movie got financed is beyond me. Is there a race to the bottom for M Night Shyamalan?
Four folks show up at a gay couple's cabin to inform them they must chose someone to sacrifice in their family (they have a little girl) or else all of humanity will die. The whole film is them talking with this couple.
There is nothing scary, suspenseful, thought provoking or interesting in this film. I multitasked in order to watch this garbage otherwise I wouldn't have made it to the end. I felt nothing. Not one emotion. Other than shock at this appalling excuse for a film.
The Batman (2022)
Cerebral vs Action Approach to Batman
I was underwhelmed by this iteration of the multiple versions of Batman. Pattinson functioned more like a sullen teenager in search of his identity than a confident billionaire. The plot ran like a procedural crime investigation rather than an action packed thrill ride. Even Penguin and Riddler were toned down behind masks or gads of prosthetic make up. (I admit Danny DeVito's Penguin is etched permanently in my mind).
Zoe Kravitz plays a serious Catwoman devoid of catty pranks. I do have to say, the fact Batman never went away with her always made me sad. Forget Gotham, you big dumb lug!
Perhaps the biggest fail was the complete and total lack of humor. I had to wait all the way to the end of three long hours to have Paul Dano finally make me laugh. Go see it and maybe you will enjoy it. We all look for different things in Batman.
Station Eleven (2021)
Faulty Premise Issues
1% of humanity survives a bad flu and a band of traveling thespians result? Just because a 20 something year old used to be a child Shakespearean actress? No. Just no. Maybe farming or hunting and gathering? Eating for survival seems irrelevant. I made it 20 minutes into the second episode before turning this off. The script is neither compelling, nor believable nor entertaining, even the magnificent MacKenzie Davis can't save this silliness. The fact Rotten Tomatoes rated this above 90% shows that site has lost all credibility.
Dune: Part One (2021)
Without Soul
Sad to say this first installment of Dune is without soul. As mighty as Oscar Isaac's Leto Atreides is, his presence can't save a dull script. All the actors do serviceable jobs because that's all the script & direction allows. As a stand alone film, most will walk away feeling they got very little story because quite frankly, very little of the plot is covered. It then becomes more of a character driven approach vs action.most of us for hard fans will tolerate that to get to a hopefully more thrilling sequel.
Tales from the Loop (2020)
A half baked sci-fi human drama
The series is largely unconcerned with trying to explain the mythology of the Loop in which the townspeople find themselves, but rather focused on telling human stories, with the sci-fi elements as a backdrop. Showrunner Nathaniel Halpern stated one need not "fuss over lore or dive into supplemental material" in order to enjoy the series. I beg to differ. Human drama is all well and good but all good sci-fi at least tells the viewer a little bit about the science. I don't like my sci-fi served boring.
A Ghost Story (2017)
Ridiculous
Not sure how this film was ever green lit. Mara and Affleck's talents are wasted on a story with zero substance. A grieving young widow is haunted by her recently deceased husband. Looking scenes of Mara eating pie or listening to music. Very little to move the story forward because we'll, there IS no story. The ghost is a man with a sheet over him who stands watching his beloved in various rooms in their house.
She moves out and a new family moves in. Ghost must be mad because he throws dishes around and scares the new family. Insulting drivel.
Tell Me Your Secrets (2021)
Binge worthy but poorly executed subplots
I was hooked from the beginning on this thriller about a woman in witness protection whose memory is affected. The whole series you wonder if she's guilty of a spate of murders or if it was her ex boyfriend. One of the presumed dead is Theresa Barlow whose mother pursues a fiery trail to find her daughter.
Lily Rabe and her man, Hamish Linklater and Amy Brenneman are all excellent actors but there are several subplots that don't receive enough attention. Some might say this is a good set up for season two, but even within one season, the viewer should be able to understand the motivations of all characters. Pete for example seems in cahoots with Bodie Lord in the last few minutes of the finale. The finale also tells us it was neither Karen nor her boyfriend Kit who murdered Theresa. It all becomes a mess towards the end.
Smilla's Sense of Snow (1997)
I've rewatched many times
A beautiful film set in Denmark depicting the story of a mathematician who attempts to resolve the death of a boy who lived in her apartment building.
Smilla is a bright but surly woman who resents her father for removing her from Greenland after her mother died. She befriends a mysterious man in her building who also loved the boy and they embark on a mutual quest for the truth. Smilla's background in Inuit culture helps her 'read the snow' where the boy ran off the roof of her building. Without giving anything away, one clue after another is revealed and the story becomes much larger as we learn there is a corporation with a vested interest in the boy's health. Many complain about the third segment of this film as Smilla boards a ship to a location in the arctic to uncover the final piece of the puzzle. But I myself found this finale very satisfying. The whole film is like poetry, with a beautiful musical score and stunning arctic landscapes. Julia Ormond and Gabriel Byrne are very good actors and create believable characters. Supporting actors like Tom Wilkinson, Richard Harris and Jim Broadbent also add value to this eerie and evocative film.
High-Rise (2015)
A Total Mess
I love Tom Hiddleston and Jeremy Irons but the plot in this film is virtually non existent. I suppose one might call this art but I do not. A modern high rise building with wealthy at the top, middle class in the middle and lower class at the bottom descends into total chaos in some type of class warfare. Our main protagonist also descends into madness. None of it makes any sense. You don't particularly like any of the characters. It's an absurd film that can't be taken seriously.
The God Committee (2021)
Do Not Waste Your Money
I rented this film online and never wasted money this badly. The premise is interesting enough. A committee of health professionals decide eligible candidates for heart transplants. The film is derailed by it's non existent plot. Any 10 ratings on IMDb should be met with a high degree of skepticism.
Kelsey Grammar is grossly miscast as the lead scientist who pioneers a new transplant technique. One part boring and two parts asshole, he smokes his way through the role as if sleep walking in a dream, oblivious of anything that really matters in life. Julia Stiles is a good actor but she can't save the weak storyline and dialogue. Janeane Garofalo is always a treat but her role is relegated to pragmatic administrator, not exactly a great use of her talents.
My biggest complaint is how futile the plot drones on as we follow the committee's reasoning for their final decision. This can't even be considered a drama because there is zero drama. I'm sad to see this mess for 3 actors who I've loved over the years.
A Quiet Place Part II (2020)
Very Cheap Thrill
So many questions, where to begin.
Is the boy Marcus cognitively disabled? I genuinely wondered this as I watched him make noise after noise when his literal survival depended on being quiet.
Has the great Djimon Hounsou's acting career tanked so bad, it led him to make a 5 minute appearance in a film of this low caliber?
Do the creatures really not know how to swim? Mom can obliterate them with rifles and fire yet the military hasn't carpet bombed these suckers or established large settlements on islands?
I love Emily Blunt and John Krasinski but this is a deplorable sequel that did nothing to move a story forward. It was rinse and repeat. Some scares followed by offing the lizard offenders with frequency. Deja vu anyone?
The high ratings are either made by those with a stake in the film's success or those who impress easily.
Cillian Murphy and Millicent Simmonds are fabulous actors who I hope I see in future films more becoming of their talent.
Black Space (2020)
Unbelievability in this High School Drama
The teenager characters are quite self-indulgent and unlikeable. The actors were too old to portray teens. The lead cop is the typical hard nosed cop who breaks all the rules and puts career before wife. Furthermore the plot would have us believe a teenager is so consumed with guilt she'll shoot her friends who bullied a kid who later commit suicide? That's a big leap from being just stupid to full on sociopathic. It fell flat for me and I felt in a rush for this mess to end.
Ragnarok (2020)
Thor Based on True Nordic Mythology
This two season miniseries with six parts each is binge worthy for several reasons. What if Thor was a modern day teenager living in a Norwegian town? The actors and directing are spot on. The teenagers are likeable which is no small feat. Lead actor who plays Thor is believable as our unwilling hero who grows into his hero role. And his brother (Loki) is an absolute treat. The writing is excellent and in parts, very funny. The storyline is based on true Norse mythology about the fight between the Giants (chaos) and the Gods (order) and how humans are caught between.
I like season one pacing more than season two which introduces more of Thor's team. But season two finale did not disappoint. I've been watching Scandinavian and European tv for a long time and this series stacks up nicely in quality.
The Intruder (2019)
Two Points for Unintentional Humor
I think it's hilarious the wife says she writes about female empowerment but can't identify a stalker when he's in her face 24/7. This film is about a couple who buy a house in Napa Valley from a dude who ... just ... won't go away. Not once does it occur to them to call the authorities. Hmm. Midway point, the husband finally does some research on our friendly house haunter but alas, his wife is too stupid for words and invites him in for pizza and wine. You can imagine the rest. It's not that original. I gave it two stars for how funny it was.
Red Dot (2021)
This Couple Gets Everything They Deserve
First point ... you take your woman on a blizzarding white out camping trip to save your marriage? How ... not ... sexy. Try Cancun next time.
Second point ... when you find out what this couple did and walked away from you will cheer on any chills and thrills they experience on their outdoor adventure.
Your Honor (2020)
Lost interest after episode three
First episode shows a kid named Adam crashing into a guy on a motorbike because he's reaching for his inhaler. Damn teenagers. If it's not cell phones it's inhalers. Anyway, turns out the killed youngster is the son of a mobster. Adam's father is a judge who tells his son they must cover up the crime otherwise the mobster will kill him.
Everything after that goes downhill ... fast! The judge asks a friend to dispose of the car. The kid who's asked to 'steal' the car is picked up by the police, arrested and therefore linked to the vehicular murder. Doesn't take long the mob kills the poor black kid in jail. Just fugly. Especially distasteful considering all that's happening in America right now. What's wrong with the writers?
Story goes on as the mob finds out they revnge killed the wrong person and they find out the judge erased video tape at a gas station of his son filling up the car.
It's a real slog to sit through scenes with long drawn out dialogue and long paused, hanging in there for one morsel of interesting plot. Just not worth it. The only character I cared for is dead. Very shocked this writing was green lit.
Lilyhammer (2012)
Would give it an 8 but last season is bad
First season of Lilyhammer had me laughing frequently as our mafia fixer created his new life in a Norwegian town. The mix of his street wise business sense with the quaint Norwegian folks was funny and the characters were eccentric. Second season was okay but it was more of the same. Third season really fell flat. It was written in a frenetic pace with sub plots ranging from Brazil drug fiasco to Jan coming back from Iraq even nuttier than before. The storyline was all over and I found myself not laughing but instead wondering how any of it was supposed to be funny. Lots of adolescent male humor with blow jobs, male psychotic fixation on lactating breasts and nonsensical violence every ten seconds. IMDB has lost credibility when there are so many 9 and 10 ratings. Still, Van Zandt plays an excellent italian mobster and his motley crew of associates are all played by good actors. It was just the writing that lost its way. Some shows should only be one or two seasons.
The Alienist (2018)
Too Dark for Me
The storyline, dialogue and acting are all very good but child male prostitutes in New York is far too depressing for me. Anything where children are being used and abused is just too dark for me. I kept watching because I loved the characters and solving the murder mystery. But be warned it's dark material.
I read other reviews which say season two sidelines Laszlo Kreizler in favour of Sara Howard. This is disappointing but I'll still watch.
The Dressmaker (2015)
Such a fun film
This film is a one part whimsical and two parts dark humour tale. The cast of characters are all excellent but Judy Davis as the eccentric mother really shines. Kate Winslet plays a fancy dressmaker who returns to her roots in Dungatar Australia in the hopes of answering some questions. The plain town folks soon find themselves calling on the dressmaker to liven their wardrobes. Their need for fashion trumps the fact the whole town blamed her as a child for the death of a boy. I teared up in parts but mostly laughed all the way through this film. Really best to watch with no expectations and just let it take you on the ride.
Criminal: UK (2019)
Have watched Criminal UK, Spain, Germany
I adore this series and have watched both season one and two a couple times. It's about police questioning of various crimes, all in a single room with a mirror hiding the police team's room. The acting is stellar. The storylines and crimes are intriguing. It's suspenseful and illuminates the many strategies police use to 'get their man'. Highly recommend Criminal Spain and Germany, and France but UK is my favourite. British actors are a cut above.
Ratched (2020)
Sarah Paulson Can't Save Bad Writing
I watched this for Sarah Paulson but even she can't save the bad writing in this spin off series from the film One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. The story follows Ratched getting hired as a nurse in a mental institution to save her serial killer younger brother who's been placed there.
The first couple episodes are passable but then the writers start changing their main character. Ratched is first presented as a steely cold confidant woman who cares nothing for others. Then she's portrayed as sympathetic to female patients suffering under the Doctor's experimental treatments. Or as vulnerable and unsure of her sexuality when she spends time with the governor's press secretary.
This show suffers from style over substance. Set designs and costumes are fantastic but the storyline is not compelling and at times nonsensical.