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Reviews
Devotion (2022)
What a waste of time this was
The pace of the movie is incredibly slow. Nothing worthwhile happens for the whole first hour.
The problem is, Jesse Brown was a remarkable man who worked extremely hard to overcome hardship and prejudice to graduate and become an aviator. That's the exceptional, and interesting, part of his life (plus another, we'll come to it). The movie doesn't show any of that though, as it begins when Brown is already a pilot.
His missions in Korea just aren't that interesting; the only interesting action sequence in the film is an air-to-air dogfight that never actually happened. They had to make it up, because strafing tiny dots on the ground is boring cinema. You -can- make it interesting, but you have to make viewers care about the stakes and that's hard. Hey look, a MIG!
Which brings us to the most important part of the film: Brown and Hudner's interaction. Brown (spoiler!) was probably hit by small arms ground fire and had to crash-land behind enemy lines. Since he was wounded and unable to escape the wreck, Hudner chose to crash-land to help him get out (but couldn't).
That's very moving! So why does everything the two men say to each other throughout the movie sound so wooden and soulless?
Hudner, in particular, feels like a cardboard cutout. Him crashing to help his friend should be the emotional climax of the film. But it can't be, because the film should have built up to that point, and doesn't.
What a waste of time this was.
Siren: Survive the Island (2023)
Watched all the episodes as soon as I could.
It was an engaging show with good challenges and real suspense. There is little time-wasting commentary, at least compared to other shows of its kind, and I really was rooting for the competitors and admiring their skill and ingenuity.
The team dynamics were interesting. I think the challenges could be a little more varied and/or balanced (they seemed to fit the talents of some of the teams a lot more than others'), but overall, this was a lot of fun.
On three different evenings I found myself staying up late to finish watching all the episodes as soon as I could. My only regrets are my favourite team's loss, and the fact there aren't any episodes left.
Floor Is Lava (2020)
I like lava too, but...
I think there should be more competition. Teamwork is fine.
But I don't want to see team after team re-do the same stuff the others just did.
Also, the commenter makes the show worse with dumb comments and an annoying voice.
Still ok.
Thermae Romae Novae (2022)
A bit thin
The idea is nice, the episodes are short and watchable, and Ms. Yamazaki's short documentaries at the end are very interesting.
It has a few flaws - not much happens in the episodes, and the formula quickly becomes repetitive. While there is an overall plot, there's just not much of it.
(And I guess, a cultural quibble: an ancient Roman would not overwork himself like a Tokyo salaryman - it would be undignified for a well-bred free man of means).
That said, it was fun to watch.
Love and Leashes (2022)
Refreshingly heartfelt and cute
After so many shallow and mechanical shows that use bdsm as a prop (looking at you, Bonding...), it was very uplifting and touching to have a story about love and mutual respect made by someone who cares about and respects the topic and the characters.
9 and not 10 because a few plot points seemed a bit rushed. But definitely worth it.
WWII in Color: Road to Victory (2021)
Cringey, insultingly simplistic commentary. Good videos.
As it says above: the commentary is very superficial, extremely simplistic and very navel-gazingly America centric. The narrator's voice is completely unsuited to the topic and doesn't feel at all like he's talking about a war that killed millions.
The videos are ok.
John Leguizamo's Latin History for Morons (2018)
heh
A fantasy that picks and chooses what Latin means (indigenous or Spanish? It depends on what's better at the moment), and idealizes the pre-Columbian civilizations. Sometimes funny.
Kyô kara Ore wa!! (2018)
Chicken for three days and you'll hate chicken
One or two good episodes: the first is genuinely entertaining, and there arw maybe one or two good twists. But the other episodes are just the same plot over and over and over again.
Eric Andre: Legalize Everything (2020)
Aggressively unfunny
A child who has just learned a new bad word screams it on a stage for an hour.
Aggressively unfunny edgelord embarasses himself while randomly groping public.
Police Academy (1984)
Unfunny garbage
Did 80s audiences have worms in their brains?
There is nothing here except a constant onslaught of unfunny trash.
The spiritual ancestor of epic movie.
How to Become a Tyrant (2021)
Entertaining but shallow
The overview is superficial, embellished, focused on personalities at the expense of ideology and historical factors, and had some very noticeable gaps, which happen to be the key market countries for Netflix.
Peter Dinklage does have a great narrator voice, and the episodes are ok in the background if you're chopping carrots.
Love, Death & Robots: The Drowned Giant (2021)
Portrait of the scientist as a lazy useless dork
I didn't hate the episode, but I felt frustrated very early on by a lack of believability. Don't get me wrong, I'm perfectly fine with the giant on the beach. But the first thing I thought was "why is there not some police, even one?" to keep vandals away and protect from an obvious health hazard?
That was before they actually showed the vandalism.
And the main character... doesn't behave like a scientist at all, but like some amateurish art critic - even discounting his pompous 18th century phrases.
He just looks at the corpse (which is quite unlike an actual, bloated drowned corpse), and does... nothing.
He doesn't attempt to discover anything about it. Not where it comes from, not what it eats, not if its dna is like our own, no sign, scar, or other clue, not if there are others, not if any sea animal took a bite... nothing.
You'd think someone would be interested, but no.
Bonding (2018)
Oh well.
It's good that the second season appears to have spent a lot of attention to representation, although it has gone a bit overboard the other way and it has done his at the expense of plot and rhythm. It seems a bit preachy and almost like it's apologising for the first season. Maybe one day we will have a show with just two people in a stable, loving relationship who happen to be owner and slave, rather than limiting bdsm to sex work. Oh well.
Angels & Demons (2009)
Junk
Writer's alter-ego goes to postcard-city, is paired with beautiful local woman, solves evil conspiracy. James Bond fantasy for nerds, except only those too dumb or lazy to learn real science and real history.
Trotskiy (2017)
gah
Written by someone who does not know how communists think. It shows.
Rise of Empires: Ottoman (2020)
Finally
Quite entertaining, well acted, all around well made.
Could be even better if the historians didn't keep interrupting, but it works as a documentary.
1917 (2019)
Move on
Making things hard for yourself as a director with technical stunts and virtuoso shots does NOT make your film better.
If your self-imposed one-take forces you to make a movie that is both unrealistic and wildly boring, maybe you shouldn't have used it.