mcdgames Reviews

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008)

Should Be Put to Sleep Like the Dead

[4/10 · 8 August 2008]

I'm being a little harsh on this movie. Actually, it's okay for mindless Saturday matinée drivel. Emphasis on the mindless.

The writers have, all throughout this franchise, seem bent on just throwing a bunch of hackneyed action and stilted dialogue at the audience with as much weight in the script as a cream puff.

They take actual legendary/mythological references, locales and characters and tailor make them to their own goofiness. Take the reference on Shangri-La, for instance. Shangri-la was invented by James Hilton in his pro-Utopian novel, Lost Horizon. Shangri-la grants immortality (or, as the characters in Lost Horizon discern) probably just extremely long life. There's a catch, though: once you leave Shangri-la, you age rapidly and die.

The action sequences are all over-the-top, and if you are an impressionable moron who likes bright and shiny things that are always blowing up, you'll like this.

I'm a fan of Brendan Frazer, but I think he's due for a better turn this this nonsense.

Blood Diamond (2006)

Overrated Hollywood Politics

[5/10 · 24 June 2008]

This movie has been out awhile, and I just watched it on DVD.

First of all, the cinematography is just wonderful. Africa is one of my favorite settings. It's exotic and intriguing and always presents itself as a highly adventurous place. Kudos there.

The story here in Blood Diamond is very violent, reflecting the instability of African "nations." Of course, this instability is heightened by the standard Hollywood political claptrap that the world is being victimized and that some white Hollywood actor/writer/director/producer is going to set it straight by providing their take on the world situation. Let's face it, most of these people who put these types of movies together are morons who cannot give a good account of their own private, shallow lifestyles let alone depict and preach on how bad the outside world is.

Oh, if we could all be just like Brad Pitt and Angeline Jolie and Madonna and just go to Africa and adopt starving black kids. That's is so Christlike. Wow, aren't we angelic? So, the politics in this movie are just over-the-top, so much, in fact, that the movie becomes more of a self-absorbed white crusade to make the world "right", rather than a movie that details people caught up in a story about the despicable diamond market. Leonardo di Caprio goes through his tirade about how this evil works, in a bid to show how angelic his character is, when, actually, his character is the most despicable by far. Then, of course, we have the typical American beauty, Connelly, who appears just to somehow make a bid on how the white world is sooooooooo sensitive to the plight of self-destructive Africaans.

This movie is overrated and was promoted so well by the Hollywood propaganda machine, it actually was a hit. Garnered 5 Academy Award nominations? For what? Di Caprio's stilted accent?

The Legend of Hell House (1973)

Creepy

[8/10 · 24 October 2006]

This is an older movie, based upon the novel by Richard Matheson "Hell House" (and his screenplay). It is essentially a harsher look into Shirley Jackson's timid "The Haunting of Hill House" and the overrated 1963 "The Haunting" and it's unmentionable 1999 remake.

The story is simple: psychic investigators set up in a spooky house allegedly filled with outrageous disturbances based upon cannibalism, sexual vice, substance abuse, vampirism. They are hired by an eccentric billionaire afraid of dying and whom wishes to ascertain that there is indeed "surviving intelligence".

I've seen Roddy McDowell in a variety of trashy and silly nonsense over the years, but his earlier work is greatly admired; he makes a strong performance here as a shattered physical medium who is frightened of the house and only joins the others because of the money.

An excellent ghost story with a morbid darkness, LoHH is something to be afraid of. The first time I watched it I thought it was interesting. Subsequent times I now believe it is possibly one of the BEST haunted house movies ever made.

Don't see it alone.

King Kong (2005)

Long-Winded Fun Ride (but it's just a gorilla suit movie)

[7/10 · 31 August 2006]

Everything about this movie in production is excellent. The performances, the script, the effects, the direction. The drawbacks would be easily the length and the fact that this is just another man-in-a-gorilla-suit movie. Well, CGI over Andy Serkis's frame, but you get what I mean.

The movie is known to have been Mr. Jackson's pet project from since he was a little kid. However, even though he approaches this remake that is more mature and stronger than its predecessors, it is still just a movie about a gorilla tearing around New York.

I don't think anyone could have done this movie better, and I liked the original and I still have stomach squirms from the 1976 version, yet Mr. Jackson's talent could be used on greater things, I believe. His genius at the Lord of the Rings trilogy shows this.

Good movie - if you like a B-script and gargantuan gorillas. By-the-by, I enjoyed the "Heart of Darkness" allusion (I'm a big Conrad fan).

The Brothers Grimm (2005)

Under-appreciated Surrealism

[7/10 · 22 August 2006]

I enjoyed this movie to watch it a multitude of times; as the main comment suggests, it is much like Burton's "Sleepy Hollow" (which is one of my favorite movies).

It's greatest strength is it's cinematography and Gilliam's fantasy vision he's known for in all of his films. It is colorful and somewhat convoluted (you need to watch it more than once to get the undercurrents).

Heath Ledger and Matt Damon are interesting anti-heroes, and I found myself rooting for Ledger much more than Damon in this. Some other performances are odd and over-the-top, but there is one scene in which one of the villains (the killer from "Fargo") loses his toupee and goes into a panic attack trying to retrieve it. The main women of the story are breathtakingly beautiful, but I believe the Red Queen is a magnificent villain while the actress playing the huntress/guide was somewhat lackluster. Jonathan Pryce is good also, but he comes off too strange for a tension building adversary for our heroes as they blunder about.

The artwork (as in "Sleepy Hollow") is the main thing to watch here. Some of the acting is disjointed, but I've never seen a movie by Gilliam that wasn't a tad off-the-mark.

The Ninth Gate (1999)

Another Literary Book versus Motion Picture Bout

[7/10 · 2 August 2006]

First of all I really enjoyed this movie. The first time I saw it I didn't care for it too much; it took a couple more subsequent viewings to actually appreciate what Polanksi was driving. I can't say that I'm a Polanski fan, I think the only other movie I've enjoyed to any degree was "The Fearless Vampire Hunters". I am a so-so Johnny Depp fan, even with the PotC movies of late. I have far more respect for Frank Langella.

Then, suddenly, this movie appealed. I began to understand the Machiavellian application to it; forget "Satanism", Satanism is merely a religion/philosophy which teaches its followers to indulge in their every whim. Overindulge without restraint; this leads to chaos.

The Ninth Gate is Satanic only in the way it dares to challenge status quo and the Firmament. Can Man equate with God? It appears that if he contemplates the cryptic but profound lessons of the Nine Gates (in Numerology, 9 is symbolic with God) he may become one with Divinity. The other lesson about touring the Nine Gates? He has to be ruthless and not distracted; therefore you cannot overindulge yourself. Hence, the work is not akin to the doctrines of Satanism.

The book, Reverte's "The Club Dumas" was literary and enjoyable in parts, but lacked Polanksi's more direct approach. The book merely hinted about Satanism and the equation of Divinity and Man. I felt that Reverte wanted to say something, but like an alchemist looking for the Philosopher's Stone, he had trouble locating the right formula.

Polanski redoes the work and makes it more streamlined. The movie is much more frightening in what it supposes than "The Da Vinci Code"; Nine Gates actually makes Man God.

The Da Vinci Code (2006)

Vastly Underrated

[7/10 · 25 July 2006]

I'm a writer; I spend most of my leisure time either reading or writing. Frequently when I compare an original literary work with a successive motion picture, I often fall into the purist view that the book is better. There have been some exceptions to this rule: Jackson's "Lord of the Rings" direction is better than Tolkien's writing skills (and I'm a Tolkien fan, if you can believe that) and Polanski's "The Ninth Gate" is somewhat better than Reverte's The Club Dumas.

In my opinion, Dan Brown is a mediocre writer who discovered pay-dirt with an innovative, controversial story. His writing skills are not literary, but close to dime store level. He's passable, yes, but definitely not in the league of moving and profound writers as Norman Mailer, K Vonnegut, or Thomas Mann. The novel, The Da Vinci Code, and it's prequel, Angels and Demons, are fast reads and fun. They deliver an escape while you are sitting on a subway on rush hour.

With the over-hype of the novel, we suddenly have the inevitable attempt at a motion picture. Usually these revisions are mediocre (at best) or fall by the wayside. Yet, in the motion picture "The DA Vinci Code", we have a visual depth that the literary relative of it falls completely short of.

I watched the motion picture, enthralled by the visual artwork and the intricacies of plot. It was soberly done, even with the controversial casting of Tom Hanks in the lead role. Hanks is usually (to me) overbearing and self-important in his later roles, and he doesn't stop here, however, he is believable - more believable than the Robert Langdon from the books. Tom Hank's Langdon is smart, reserved, and appears to be exactly an intellectual in reality; the Langdon in the novels comes off more as a McGuffin to move the story along, rather than experience it.

I'm a big Gandalf fan, but I'm not a Mysterio fan, so my reception of Ian McKellen's performance in this movie is neutral. I think he's interesting here, but somehow more aloof and somewhat more of the X-Man villain than the wise wizard type. Therefore, his performance at least comes off somewhat wooden.

The cinematography is enough to enhance the shots, but are somewhat lacking (in a minor consideration). The exotic locales are hard not to keep a deep aesthetic luster, even if they'd been shot with a VHS camcorder and sent in to "America's Funniest Home Videos". But I think you get my point.

The movie is cerebral and smart, the book a puzzle with gimmicks. Don't go into the theater as the novel fan, but as someone who enjoys a movie to stand on it's own. You'll find this motion picture stronger and more satisfying.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest (2006)

Comic Book Entry

[6/10 · 24 July 2006]

The first movie was reserved with it's frolicking about with pirates AND the supernatural, it's highlights wasn't the CGI undead crewing a ghost ship but in the wonderful acting by Johnny Depp and Keira Knightly. The cast had fun making that movie - you can tell.

Enter PotC2: Dead Man's Chest. Oh, it's fun, with Raiders of the Lost Ark cliffhangers that include a rolling mill wheel and globular cages; its sword fights are over the edge; a huge squid pulls down ships and eats them; and some weird guy wanders around darkly with tentacles hanging off his face.

It actually is so garish that it loses its charm, and you are forced to ignore any attempt by the cast to put in a good performance (other than the rollicking Depp) by the sheer magnitude of "Spiderman" special effects. Too much. Ouch. Where's the story? Disney: "Forget a plausible storyline, we'll dazzle the cattle by bright lights and Captain Jack Sparrow jokes." Now I'm being harsh; it's a fun matinée movie and Disney and its constituents have done a marvelous job once again of delivering something that will keep one brainless for it's mega 2 1/2 hour carnival ride.

Cha-Ching!

Start the Revolution Without Me (1970)

Farce from the "Old School"

[7/10 · 20 July 2006]

To put it simply, this movie is outrageous. It flopped during its theater tenure because everyone was too high-strung over Vietnam and other period conflicts to actually understand this comedy. This fact is also touched on during the commentary by the director himself.

"Revolution" is in the same league as the Zucker Brothers. It's gags gain momentum as the movie unwinds, until it's whipping around during the last few scenes almost out of control, yet marvelously in control.

This is a movie that has Gene Wilder at his comic peak. He's pre-Wonka and pre-"FrankenSTEEN" here, and hasn't found temperance in his angry hysteria. I've watched this movie close to 15 times, and I can't handle myself when Wilder is galloping around with his stuffed falcon. And the gags in his marriage! "Bring the leather and the honey ... " (His character's wife looks at the camera with a look of worry).

Donald Sutherland is reserved, but he's not well known for his comedy. Yet he has excellent moments, especially in strangling adversaries on the dock with one hand! "...and I shall be the Queeeeen!" The funniest pieces here are actually the lines. Read the quotes! Oh my, a gold mine!

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II - The Sith Lords (2004 Video Game)

Sheer Machiavellian

[8/10 · 30 June 2006]

There can be many ways to rate this video game: playability, storyline, graphics, voice acting, etc. The best way to rate it is by what it delivers and its final intent. First of all, you must understand that the central story and the teachings of Kreia (and the voice actor herself) are the greatest reasons to play and own. The expansion of the Sith teachings is marvelous, especially if you choose to go 'dark'.

The great things about this game: 1. Kreia. I hated this b**** when I first played, because she was always bitching about something. Yet when I began to interact with her more, the more I began to understand the grand design of her teachings and master plan. This means that if you go through it quickly just to fight things (as in a platform VG), you are going to lose much.

2. The atmosphere. The one thing I disliked in Lucas' movies was his homage to the juvenile and pointless serials of the 1940s. The Sith Lords allowed the Force to be something of a 2-sided blade (pardon the pun), both the Light and the Dark are perilous.

3. Bao-Dur. I really liked him; so sorry that others feel his character was lackluster. I knew guys in the military who were just like him.

4. The Exile. I like the idea he/she can be so cynical and detached from good or evil. A true outcast - you can mold him/her like you want to.

5. Good re-playability. Things change from different character types and genders. I've played this game probably 10 times, playing both male and female, good, neutral or dark. There is always something new to see even if you beat it.

6. Good Story. I love the Machiavellian ideals of Kreia. She is truly the most fearsome Sith Lord I've seen.

7. Dxun. Fun area; I like going one on one with the armored lizard without anyone else in the party to back me up.

8. Mira. I'm a guy and I have a love for redheads.

The things that were not so great: 1. Quirky and lost endings for characters. Thanks LucasArts and Obsidian for shearing off more of what could have been the best VG I've ever played because of your Sith-like greed.

2. Useless characters. G0T0 for example. I never used him nor did I like him or his yacht.

3. Gliches. These can be less numerous on the XBOX version. Again, the powers-that-be decided to rush things (but we already know that).

4. *spoiler* Fighting Darth Sion over and over again (like you did in KOTOR I with Bastila and Malak). I like Sion; he just wasn't used good enough - and with him, you really didn't need to confront Darth Nihilus.

5. Darth Nihilus. Too vague, too aloof. An extra villain that could have been merged with Darth Sion. The only thing I think the designers banked on was his strange white mask.

The neutral things would be about everything else.

The Bermuda Depths (1978 TV Movie)

A Haunting Sea Story (from a Depths fanatic)

[6/10 · 20 June 2006]

This is a motion picture that can be rated in many facets, and in some ways it would disappoint a casual viewer or enthrall another who sees something deeper (pardon the pun) in the story.

First of all, Connie Selleca's unearthly beauty is one of the main reasons to watch this. She is so like a mythic siren, that you will no doubt be lost upon the rocks by just following her crystal blue eyes.

For those who like guys, Leigh McLoskey is a personable but vague "hunk" (my girlfriend has a still of him from this movie).

The story is haunting with some very interesting elements within it. The soundtrack is somewhat dated, of course, but adds much character to the overall effect. Maurie Laws' harpsichord instrumental is the best bet here, capturing Selleca's distant and melancholy character Jennie Haniver from the time she was alive.

Suspend disbelief, and just watch the scenery and the atmosphere here - don't get yourself hooked up on special effects (or lack thereof); this is not Spiderman or Star Wars. Watch for the smaller and more moody shots that actually will make you yearn to for the ocean and its mysteries.

The problems with this movie? The script could have been polished, yes. Bankin-Bass could have tried to put more money into better effects and a better director overall. The acting is a tad bit over-melodramatic. I kept waiting for Burl Ives to fall into a sea chantey.

Still, watch it on a cloudy Saturday afternoon when the house is quiet. If you live on the coast, its better.