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Transformers (2007)
8/10
the view according to www.georgevader.co.uk
1 October 2007
Now I have to admit, I've never watched a Transformers cartoon in my life, I was in my mid to late teens when they were a hit back in the 80's, only three things were on my mind, Metal, Football and getting laid!! So it must be said that when it was announced that there would be a life action movie of the show I really wasn't that excited or interested, that was until I saw the first trailer which blew me away. It has to be said I don't think you'll have seen special effects that could top these, the robots look astonishing and are, as you would hope and expect the stars of the show.Who cares about lousy dialogue and slightly ropey acting, all I wanted to see was robots kicking ass and smashing thing up and boy do you get it!! The film has quite a long running time of nearly 150 minutes but it zips along at a good pace, you never have to wait to long for an action set piece and there's always the eye candy of Megan Fox to fill in the gaps.

Easily the Summer movie of the year, daft, action packed with a good dose of humour, looking forward to part 2 already.....
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Shoot 'Em Up (2007)
8/10
the view according to www.georgevader.co.uk
12 September 2007
Right lets get the plot out the way first, guy saves pregnant woman, delivers baby, protects baby form bad guys out to kill it, and him.

That's it, let's not beat about the bush this film is ridiculous, preposterous, downright stupid, with some of the cheesiest dialogue you could imagine....and I loved every bullet riddled head cracking minute.

Clive Owen is a blast as the carrot (yes carrot) chomping trench coated bad ass, with a BAD, yes BAD attitude.Paul is a revelation as one real, real evil and sadistic bad guy, we get a bit of glamour with the addition of Monica Belluci but sadly she seems a bit wasted amongst the carnage present, a shower scene might have been a nice rest bite bullets flying.

This film has it all for the Saturday night pop corn no-brainer out there, shoot out, LOTS of shoot outs, car chases, bad gags and puns that would make a Roger Moore Bond blush, a head banging soundtrack, an Italian babe.....great fun, like watching last years "Crank" on Angel Dust!
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Hatchet (2006)
7/10
the view according to www.georgevader.co.uk
11 September 2007
In the deepest swamps of Louisiana a diverse group of tourists go on a "haunted swamp tour", what they don't know is a psychotic killer is loose, and he wants to spill blood! If you're a fan of 80's slasher classics such as "Friday 13th" and "The Burning" this is for you, possibly one of the goriest films in past years, each murder out splatters the previous.This isn't your grubby"torture-porn" style flick though, this film has it's tongue firmly in it's cheek with plenty of black humour and wacky characters to enjoy, the perfect entertainment on a late Saturday night with a few beers.

The film is a real homage to the 80's early 90's horror flick not just with the OTT gore and daft clueless characters but with plenty of cameos from such genre stalwarts as Robert Englund, Kane "Jason Voorhees" Hodder and Candyman's Tony Todd.

If "Itchy And Scratchy" made a slasher flick this would be it.
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Death Proof (2007)
4/10
the view according to www.georgevader.co.uk
5 September 2007
Sadly after the relative box office failure of the "Grindhouse" double bill in the US the studio decided to split the 'film' in to it's two parts, Rodridguez "Planet Terror" to be released in late Autumn preceded by this, Tarantino's "Death Proof".I've already seen and reviewed "Planet Terror" which I thoroughly enjoyed so how would Tarantino's half compare? Well it must be said, badly.The dialogue, is typical Tarantino, motherf****r this n***er that, it really is very tedious, but sadly that is the films biggest problem, bar the car crash mid way through the film and it's OTT finale, this really is one dull tedious adventure.The women have nothing of any value to say to each other, I cannot actually recall ANY of their laborious conversations, was this really penned by the same guy who brought us "True Romance", "Reservoir Dogs" and "Pulp Fiction", films with great snappy quotable dialogue?? People have complained about the butchering of the "Grindhouse" double bill but after sitting through this bore-fest I'm not surprised, save 2 hours of your life and wait for the release of "Planet Terror" either in the cinema or impending US release on DVD.
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Wind Chill (2007)
8/10
The view from www.georgevader.co.uk (drunken movie ramblings)
22 August 2007
It's a few days before the Christmas holidays when two (unnamed) students share a ride home.After taking a "short-cut" they have a serious accident and find themselves stranded in nowheresville', in the middle of a cold snap and miles from the nearest town, then the 'problems' really begin....

I have to admit I'd heard nothing about this film, in fact I'd never even heard of the title, but it proved to be a bit of a revelation.The two leads Emily Blunt (The Devil Wears Prada) and Ashton Holmes (A History Of Violence) are both very good actors and both put in good performances.The film is well paced, not letting you know too much too soon, it's a very eerie looking movie, the the darkness of the night brilliantly contrasting with the glistening snow, reminiscent of the classic "The Shining".

In an age of shock horror which has become rife in Hollywood over the past decade it nice to see a good old fashioned horror film in the fashion of say John Carpenters "The Fog" or even Peter Jackson's "The Frighteners" which it had elements that were very similar too.

A fine intelligent psychological horror film.
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9/10
The view from www.georgevader.co.uk (drunken movie ramblings)
16 August 2007
It' three in the morning, a prostitute called Kelly with ripped clothes and inflamed black eye bustles a terrified 12 year old girl into a public toilet somewhere in South London,they are fleeing from someone and decide to get the next train to Brighton.As the film progresses we slowly learn what has happened via a series of flashbacks, and it's a very harrowing subject.

I have to admit I was blown away by this 'little' film, yes the subject is deeply unpleasant, but it is handled maturely, there are no 'Lock Stock' style bad guys in this film, just ordinary people, some good, but a lot of very very sadistic violent characters.You really care for the characters which is the most important essence of any film, the acting is superb, especially Lorraine Stanley as Kelly and newcomer, Georgie Groome who is barely a teenager and puts in a stunning performance as the terrified youngster Joanne.

This is a quite brilliant debut from a young film-maker, Paul Andrew Williams, he recently quite rightly won a best newcomer award at the Edinburgh Film Festival, and for me it's one of the best British movies I've ever seen, and the best I can remember recently since "Dead Man's Shoes".
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9/10
The view from www.georgevader.co.uk (drunken movie ramblings)
15 August 2007
The 'original' "Oceans Eleven" was a great little crime comedy thriller, it's predecessor though "Oceans Twelve" was a 24 carat stinker, so bad in fact it is the one and only film I have EVER walked out of in the cinema.So when I heard a year or so that another film in the series was coming out my expectations really weren't that high it must be said.

This time round the gang are out to swindle Al Pacino who plays a ruthless Vegas casino boss Willy Bank when he double crosses their friend Reuben (Elliott Gould).This time though instead of stealing from him they intend to rig it through various means so that the punters in his casino win,win ,win...... The plot zips along at a good pace as they come up with various ways to rig the tables, slots and even give the "Five Diamonds " casino reviewer (a kind of Michelin star for casino's) the worst possible hotel/casino experience ever!

The usual cast is back, except this time no Julia Roberts, great, and the addition of Al Pacino, even greater, and a fun performance from Elen Barkin.More good news comes in the fact that Don Cheadles awful cockney accent is very low key, something that was the only low point of the first film.

Cool, fun, flashy and thoroughly entertaining right up to the final frame.
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Fracture (2007)
7/10
Good to average thriller.
12 August 2007
(Sir) Anthony Hopkins stars as Ted Crawford a successful and very wealthy engineer who shoots his wife after discovering she is having an affair.Lawyer Willy Beachum (Ryan Gosling) has to prove what seems and open and shut case, that he did it, this starts to prove more and more difficult as Ted weaves his way through legal loopholes.

I have to admit I was quite looking forward to this film, the first hour it build up quite well, as the prosecution case slowly disintegrates, the trouble is the final half hour or so seems so laboured, I was expecting a real sting in the tail. My biggest problem has to be Anthony Hopkins, I really can't take the guy seriously since "Silence Of The Hams", sorry "Lambs", it's all Hannibal Lekter cheese with an accent that flips from English to Welsh, and then bizarrely Irish! Not a bad film by any standard, just a very ordinary one I'm afraid.
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I Want Candy (2007)
5/10
sweet, charming...but not that funny
10 August 2007
Two film students head to London with their script which they believe will be the first step to Hollywood, they hook up with a dodgy film producer who agrees to finance the film, provided they can get porns hottest star Candy Fiveways (Carmen Electra).

I Want Candy' it must be said is quite a sweet and charming film in a 'The Full Monty' kind of way, sadly though unlike that film, the laughs are few and far between it must be said, I think I went a full hour before a proper laugh, a very amusing scene that all I shall say "required wet wipes"! The only selling point this film would seem to have is the chance for men to see Carmen Elektra in various sexy outfits and states of undress, something I'm sure you could see say in a Playboy DVD, if she has one that is, not that'd I'd know about that sort of thing! Lightweight fluff all in all with a serious lack of laughs I'm afraid.

5/10
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Mr. Brooks (2007)
9/10
Great performance from Costner, great film too
8 August 2007
Kevin Costner (remember him?) stars as Earl Brooks, a highly respected local businessman man who hides a dark secret, a psychofrenic urge to kill.The urge proves too much and when he kills two lovers in their apartment he is seen and caught on film at the scene by a sleezy photographer.The photographer (Dane Cook) though doesn't turn him into the Police or blackmail him though, he wants to learn to kill like Brooks and experience the 'thrill' first hand.

Costner is superb in this film and proves something that we tend to forget, what a very, very good actor he is.Equally good is the reliable William Hurt as Marshal, Mr Brook's alter-ego, this was a great idea for the film as they discussed how they would solve issues and problems together in Mr Brook's life.Supporting cast too is a fine one, Demi Moore is good as the Cop pursuing the killer, CSI Vegas' Marg Heldenberger stars as Mr Brooks oblivious Wife, though I felt her character took a back seat during the second half of the movie.The lovely Reiko Aylesworth of 24 also puts in an appearance as the lawyer out to screw Demi Moore in a divorce proceedings against her money grabbing ex-husband.

The script is clever and intelligent with a good dose of black humour and some neat twists, including one all mighty one at the end!!! Highly recommended.

9/10
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Disturbia (2007)
8/10
Quirky, quite tense little thriller
7 August 2007
A teenager Kale (Shia LeBoef) is tagged and put under house arrest, during this time he becomes convinced his sinister neighbour Mr Turner (David Morse) is a serial killer, and with help from his friend's Ronnie (Aaron Yoo) and new neighbour Ashley (Sarah Roemer) they set out to prove him guilty.

The first obvious comparison is "Rear Window", this time though the voyeur 'spies' on his neighbours not just with binoculars but with a video camera as well, he trawls the net too looking for clues and evidence.Nobody will believe him though, is he suffering from cabin fever, when it looks like he might catch him with guilty evidence, Mr Turner always delivers an alibi.

"Disturbia" is a thoroughly enjoyable, and very quirky, little thriller.There's no unnecessary gore or T&A, just a good old fashioned tense, exciting and well paced little film from director D J Carusso (who has also directed a few episodes of 'The Shield') 8.5/10
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Knocked Up (2007)
9/10
Excellent 'grown up' comedy.
5 August 2007
Slobby jobless Ben (Set Rogan) can't believe his luck when he meets an attractive charismatic career girl Alison (Katherine Heigel) in a bar, a one night stand and 2 months later and Alison is horrified to learn she is pregnant! 'Knocked Up' starts off as your by numbers 'American Pie' comedy but it soon becomes a very grown up, and very funny 'adult' comedy. When O say adult, I don't mean T&A, this film deals with real relationships and all the troubles and anxieties that they entail.

As well as the charismatic Rogan and Heigel the supporting characters are excellent too,from Bens' stoner mates ("Tell him not to jerk off with a noose around his neck - it's dangerous"), Alison sister and brother in law("You look like Babe Ruth's gay brother... Gabe Ruth") as well as smaller parts, in particular 'Saturday Night Lives'' Kristen Wiig as Jill, a snobby TV executive("We don't like liars in Hollywood") The film never sags during it's lengthy 2 hour running time, even the trip to Vegas brings in the laughs with a hilarious conversation on magic mushrooms about the amount of chairs in their Hotel room ("Isn't weird how chairs exist even when you're not sitting on them?) One of the best comedies of the year so far and, well why not, the feel good hit of the Summer! 9/10
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Captivity (2007)
5/10
A no thrills horror bore.
4 August 2007
Captivity hit the headlines earlier in the year when the billboards for the film were withdrawn in New York and LA after complaints, all 'good publicity' for the movie the producers no doubt thought, how wrong they were.Three weeks after it's release it had only pulled in a miserable $3.6M, and registered just 8% on Rotten Tomatoes, oh dear, things aren't looking good as I settle down to view the latest "torture-porn" flick vomited out of Hollywood.

Directed by "acclaimed director" Roland Joffe, he of "The Killing Fields" and "Super Mario Brothers", which he likes to omit from his c.v. the question was, is this as bad as people say? Well in all honesty, yes it's a very poor film, but it's biggest crime is that it's so dull.The "Saw" and "Hostel" film franchises are pretty average to poor horror movies but at least they're fairly interesting, the first hour of this film was akin to watching paint dry.Things do pick up a little towards the end but by then you've gone past caring. The only plus point I can muster from this film is the eye candy that is Elisha Cuthbert, great to look at in a leather dress, but this doesn't disguise the fact that she still can't act for toffee.Another major failing of the film is that for a horror/thriller it is neither suspenseful nor scary.The film just about fails on all levels really.
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Spider-Man 3 (2007)
8/10
A fine but flawed third outing
19 July 2007
The first Spider-man movie for me, alongside 'Batman Returns', was, and still is one of the great comic book movie adaptations ever, great story, characters you cared about and some great action set pieces.The second Spidy movie gained even more plaudits, except for me, yeah it was still great to look at but it was starting to get bogged down in Peter Parker's private life, and more so, Mary Jane's.

So we come to Spider-man 3, and I have to admit was wasn't expecting that much, but over-all I was pleasantly surprised.Let's deal with the major minus point this film has, one inherited from the previous film, Mary bloody Jane.This character spends the entire movie, moaning and complaining about how her career isn't panning out as hoped, how Spider-man is too busy to pay her enough attention.Please, if there's a fourth outing can we please kill this irritating excuse for a woman off!The scene in the restaurant when Parker slaps her made me stand up and cheer, yes that's how much she annoyed me.Another minor niggle was that there were a lot of villains for one movie, I thought Venom was nothing more than Spider-man with nasty pointy teeth.

Let's limit the amount of bad guys so that the one's we do have get plenty of time to smash things up,fight Spider-man and generally cause havoc. Now onto the good stuff, again the film is a visual feast, the scenes involving Sandman were spectacular and also the scene early on involving the crane.An appearance by Bruce Campbell is always a bonus, especially when his character is a snooty French restauranter.The action is fast and furious, yeas it does get a little bogged down with the amount of characters but this is two hours of fine pop-corn entertainment.

8/10
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8/10
A children's film that treats them like adults
18 July 2007
Joss Hutcherson plays Jess, a lonely bullied kid who befriends the school newbie Leslie (the superb AnnaSophia Robb), together they invent an imaginary world, Terabithia, which they explore to escape the drab mediocrity of their school and in Jess' case home lives.

I have to admit I was expecting something along the lines of "The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe", but I couldn't be more wrong.The film is set in small town in modern day America, Joss' parents show very little love or affection to him, something he becomes more aware of when at Leslie's house when they 'help' paint a room.The film also deals with very adult themes, that as a child bad things can happen, you can lose people you love and care for.

The two leads are excellent, and for two actors barely in their teens they should have promising careers ahead of them, my only criticism is that I wish Zooey Deshanel would put a few pounds on, she does look a bit skinny nowadays! 8.5/10
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Vacancy (2007)
5/10
One of the lamest endings to a horror flick you'll see.
16 July 2007
Warning: Spoilers
I had high hopes for this film.Things start of promisingly, if a little predictable.A bickering couple, Kate Beckinsale and Owen Wilson, break down in the middle of nowhere.They begrudgingly decide to stay the night at a run down motel.Soon though they start to hear strange noises but things really turn sinister when they discover some video tapes and realise they are to be the future stars of a snuff movie! So far so good.

**SPOILER ALERT** What completely ruins this film is the appallingly lame ending.I was really expecting an evil twist to precedings but all you get is our heroine managing to dispatch with all the villains, call for the Police, and find that her husband wasn't actually killed when stabbed by one of the gang!I can't remember when I was so annoyed at a films finale, utterly lame, and one of the most disappointing movies of the year.
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Turistas (2006)
6/10
Predictable slasher
14 July 2007
'Paradise Lost' starts off looking like a promising little horror movie.A group of back packers are stranded in Brazil after their bus crashes, they think they've hit the jackpot when they hook up with some locals in a secluded beauty spot, beach, beer and babes, what could go wrong? Soon though the film descends into a world of 21st Century horror clichés, evil locals, semi naked women, lots of screaming, running and one hell of a lot of swimming! It transpires that an evil local doctor wants their organs to sell to the rich, the film includes a scene you won't forget in a hurry when a naked girl has her kidney removed, a scene so gory it brought back memory's of the 1980's video nasties!!! Sadly though there's very little here on offer to recommend this film, we seen it all before in the 'Hostel' and 'Saw' series.
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Sicko (2007)
9/10
Shocking and powerful stuff
11 July 2007
'Sicko' is the latest documentary from Micheal Moore, a guy people seem to love or loathe, I'm in the former, I thought 'Fahrenheit 911' and 'Bowling For Columbine' were extremely well made and thought provoking films. 'Sicko' deals with the American health care system, one which is surely an oxy-moron after watching this documentary.I don't think I shall ever criticise the NHS ever again after seeing what happens in the US.

One interview feature's a woman who's husband was refused a possible life saving bone marrow transplant by her health insurers, he died weeks later.You view this and really wonder what the hell is going on in 'the land of the free', the insurance companies seem to purely operate to make as much money as possible and will do anything to get out of paying.Time and time again they check the fine details of an application looking for small details, one woman is refused treatment when it is disclosed she once had a yeast infection!!

Things are brought into terrible perspective when you see the free health care available to people in Canada, France, here in the UK and Cuba, yes Cuba,America's great evil neighbour.It is here that some rescue workers from 911 are treated for various conditions, all they are asked are their names and dates of birth!

After watching this you realise that the US "health care" system is one real sick joke.
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8/10
Good old fashioned brain dead actioner!!
11 July 2007
12 years after the pretty poor 'Die Hard With A Vengeance' everybody's favourite action hero John McClane is back.This time he's taking on computer hackers, hell bent on bringing the good old US of A to it's technological and economic knees.

Bruce is his usual wise ass self, and he is well supported by Justin Long and Kevin Smith (yes Silent Bob!) as computer geeks, Mary Elizabeth Winstead as his daughter and Maggie Q as the super sexy ninja baddie Mai Lihn.The only disappointment cast wise Timothy Olyphant as head honcho Thomas Gabriel, he didn't seem to exhume enough menace I felt, which is a pity as this is just what he did as Todd in the awesome 'Go'.

The action is crash bang wollop as you would expect from the Die Hard franchise, though it must be said the finale involving a US jet fighter is one of the most ludicrous action scenes I've bared witness to for some time, that pilot really was a poor shot! Leave your brain in the lobby, kick back and enjoy folks, "Yippee Kiya Mother......."(no swear words in the pc 21st Century folks!)
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6/10
A poor follow up to a fine remake
9 July 2007
A few years ago it was announced that there would be a remake of Wes Cravens 70's classic exploitation horror flick 'The Hills Hav Eyes', this quite frankly filled be with much trepidation until Alexandra Aja was named as director.Aja's previous feature had been the superb French horror flick 'Switchblade Romance' and he delivered the goods again with a top notch remake.

So as the remake was a hit out comes another 'Hills' movie, there was actually a 'Part 2' originally released back in 1985, also directed by Wes Craven, which was a bit of a turkey by all accounts. This film though follows straight on from the first one.A group of soldiers have to deliver equipment to a group of atomic scientist in New Mexico where search and destroy missions have been taking place to kill all remaining mutants.

Well we're soon in cliché-ville, the soldiers all bitch at each other, manage to lose their weapons, wander off on their own and get a pick axe in their head.You know what's going to happen as each dumb ass goon get's picked off one by one. The film has zero suspense and the dialogue is appalling, though there are worse ways to spend 90 minutes,the film isn't boring which it must be said is it's one and only plus point.
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Outlaw (2007)
7/10
Under-rated
9 July 2007
When the directors (Nick Love) previous credits have been 'The Football Factory' and 'The Business' you know what to expect. As in the director's previous movie's, this stars Danny Dyer, a guy people either love or loathe, me? I don't mind the cheeky cockney.The main man though is Sean Bean, a former paratrooper who assembles a gang of like minded individuals out to extract justice on Britain's streets, something they see the law is failing to do so.

Very much like a Death Wish' 2007, or the under-rated Michael Douglas flick 'The Star Chamber', this is a movie about revenge and vigilantism.The film has received many negative reviews, The Guardian labelling it "crime revenge porn", yes it's non pc but the ideas in the film are what a lot of fed up Britain's are thinking right now, something the po faced liberals hate to see expressed.

Things do get very daft in the final third of the film, the 'outlaws' get embroiled in a 'Heat' style gun fight when previously they couldn't fight their way out of a paper bag, but the whole movie has an earthy gritty feel and the cast is a pretty good one, Bob Hoskins as a Police 'grass', a very subdued Danny Dyer and the always reliable Sean Bean.
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1408 (2007)
9/10
Top class horror/thriller
3 July 2007
I'd read positive reviews of this film so I had a look at the trailer, boy it looked good.Written by Stephen King, starring Samuel L Jackson and the God that is John Cusack, I was really looking forward to this cookie.

Cusack plays a horror writer who spends the night in the infamous room 1408 of the Dolphin Hotel, a room that legend says, no man nor woman has stayed in for an entire night.

After having to endure the new wave of 'horror' that has spewed out of Hollywood such as Hostel and House Of Wax in the past it was a real pleasure to watch such a riveting well acted and nervy film as this.No all out gore for gores sake, no nubile teens running around to keep the male audience awake, no, just a good old fashioned horror movie that keeps you guessing to the final frame.

Quite reminiscent of the classic 'The Shining', this
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8/10
Another great British film from Shane Meadows.
3 July 2007
After the quite awesome 'Dead Man's Shoes' I was really looking forward to Shane Meadows follow up.Set in 80's England, newcomer Thomas Turgoose plays 12 year old Shaun, his Father recently killed in The Falklands, bullied at school, he befriends a gang of mods and skinheads.Things change though when the gang is infiltrated by National Front member Combo and things start to take a sinister direction.

The performances are excellent, Turgoose a revelation, this is is first major role, in fact he couldn't even get a part in his School play, Stephen Graham as Combo, another power-house performance.There are a few quibbles though, Shaun's Mother disappears from screen when he gets involved with the NF and also Shaun's 'love interest' was rather pointless and quite frankly unbelievable.

Those point's aside, this is another great film from Meadows, not in the same league as the aforementioned 'Dead Man's Shoes' but still a great effort and one the British Film Industry can be proud of.
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Date Movie (2006)
3/10
Poor lazy film-making
7 June 2006
Dreadful yes, but no worse than I expected, that's how low/high my expectations.

The real head-scratcher about this movie is that it parody's comedy's, when Airplane came out its whole coup-de-grace was its mickey taking of serious genre movies, in particular the Airport and disaster movies of it's time.

Date Movie spends almost 15 minutes of it's short running time almost re-enacting entire scenes from the 'Meet The Parents' films, and then throws in some spoofs of 'When Harry Met Sally', 'Say Anything' and the pants in the sink gag from 'Planes,Trains And Automobiles'!! (really topical stuff there guys)

Saving graces? Well there are a few amusing moments, but the trouble is, that for every good gag you get dozen or so off target. Oh, and Alyson Hannigan does look so cute.
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8/10
the view according to www.georgevader.co.uk
25 December 2005
The original (Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory) is a great kids movie with a very dark under-belly, so the prospect of a remake directed by Tim Burton,a guy who has directed some of my favourite films from the past decade,Mars Attacks! Sleepy Hollow, Edward ScissorhandsEd Wood (we'll forget the dull Big Fish And flawed Planet Of The Apes) and starring the charismatic and talented Johnny Depp filled me with high expectations.

I'm happy to say my expectations were met and surpassed.Depp is marvellous as the eccentric Wonka, the sets are out of this world, virtual eye candy throughout the entire film, the songs catchy and fun.There's no overdose of sentimentality, the criticism of the Americanisation of the movie and the unnecessary addition of Wonkas childhood to the film are completely unfounded, in fact the final 'new' scene was a very warming and touching finale to a magical movie.
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